GI Joe: The Movie, Evotized!
by L1701E
Summary: Chapter 27 up! Complete! The Misfits (both coasts) and the Joes must protect the BET from Cobra in this Misfit remake of GI Joe the Movie! RR Please!
1. Prelude to Problems!

GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!

Hello, Misfit fans, East and West alike! This is L1701E! Now we all know about GI Joe: The Movie. But what if it featured the East and West Coast Misfits? Well, this is how I think it would happen! This fic will have new characters, and a Misfit's vicious streak will be revealed to the world! Now, enjoy this story!

Disclaimer: No characters are mine except the ones I created, and the ones belonging to Red Witch and others, including a very special appearance from a surprise author's OC.

To Red Witch: Don't worry, Virus will lose it! BTW, has anyone noticed Virus appears to be slowly becoming a madman?

To Raliena: So can I, Rae. So can I. It's so funny!

To Metal Dragon1: Great! I can't wait? When will Razor make another appearance?

To Wizard1: Well, here you are! And when's Chapter Four of "Karaoke Dance Party" coming out?

It's Profile Time Again! *crowd hoots, cheers, and hollers* Anyway, now we look at a non-mutant member of my Evo-verse Avengers, the world's first super-powered rocker, the fearless, the fabulous, Kid "Rock 'n' Roll" Razor!

Kid Razor

Real Name: Robert Redford Parkins

Class: Mystically-enhanced human

Hair: Brown (Short, as Bobby), Blond (Long, as Razor)

Allegiance: Avengers

Powers: The source of the Fearless Kid Razor's powers is his magical guitar. The guitar generates a mystical energy known as the Power of Rock. When he is in his Razor form, Robert Parkins possesses superhuman level agility, reflexes, flexibility, and reaction time. He also has superhuman hearing and a sense of balance that allows him to even walk tightropes without falling.

His guitar also allows Razor to fly, shoot powerful energy beams from its head, and create protective forcefields. It has been recently discovered that when his forcefields are up, Razor is immune to all forms of telepathic probing, attack, and detection.

The most unique power Razor possesses is what's known as his "physical invulnerability". Razor cannot be hurt by pressure or physical blows, even though he feels the pain. However, Razor can be shot, stabbed, or impaled unless he gets a forcefield up.

As Razor, the part of Bobby's brain that controls fear is closed down, causing Razor to become truly fearless.

Birthplace: Cleveland, Ohio

Bio: Born and raised in Cleveland, Bobby Parkins is the only son of George and Brenda Parkins, local businessmen. At the age of six, Bobby was given karate lessons as a birthday present, and he's studied ever since. As a kid, Bobby grew to love martial arts, comedy, pro wrestling, and his father's collection of classic rock records. At seven, Bobby took up guitar, and dreamed of being a rocker, despite suffering slight stage fright.

As a teen, Bobby joined a band known as the Firecrackers, consisting of his friends Ronald "Rip" Jones on guitar and vocals, his girlfriend Wendy Anderson on lead guitar, Tommy Baines on drums, Tommy's older brother Alex on bass, and Daniel "Fingers" Carrington on keyboard (Fingers is a mutant, but his mutation is his green hair. Cleveland is a very mutant-friendly city). One day, Bobby bought a guitar at a pawn shop that contained the spirit of his musical idol, glam rocker Ronnie Rocker. 

Bobby discovered he could tap into a mystical energy known as the Power of Rock, transforming him to a mighty warrior. As Razor, Bobby's short brown hair turned into a long blond lion's mane. Bobby, a normally shy kid, found that as Razor, he was fearless, cocky, and quick with quips and kicks. Using these powers, he battled a dimension-conquering demon known as Xantor. Razor was aided by Spider-Man, the Fantastic Four, and the Avengers. Ronnie became a mentor to Razor, helping him with control issues.

At this point, his mystical-based powers came to the attention of the New York Hellfire Club's Black Queen, the immortal mutant sorceress known as Selene. She used her crystal ball to watch over the rocker, unbeknownst to him. She watched him battle enemies like Tusk (An egomanical mutant who has a wooly mammoth's head), Dr. Reptile (A scientist who got transformed into a reptilian creature and went crazy), Sonic Blue (A teenage armored genius who has super speed and sonic blasts. He reformed and now aids Razor on occasion), The Maestro (An insane classical composer with a destructive violin), Iron Maiden (A mutant woman with powers like the X-Man Colossus), and the Punker (An anarchist with superhuman strength, durability, and a sonic scream). When Selene revealed herself to Razor, she requested the guitar, claiming she could help Razor unlock its true power. When he refused, she trapped Ronnie in the Astral Plane through a necklace with a jade music-note pendant she wears around her neck simply to amuse herself. Razor swore vengeance and pledge to someday drive his guitar through her heart. 

Razor accepted Captain America's invitation to join the Avengers, and he's been their resident rock 'n' roller ever since. His jokes and quips have caused him to have different relationships with different people. He hates the X-Man Cyclops, and he thinks of former X-Man Jubilation Lee, aka Jubilee, who has a major crush on him, as an annoyance.    

As an Avenger, Razor has worked alongside the X-Men, and both the East and West Coast Misfits. He thinks of the Misfits as a fun bunch, and the X-men as a bunch of prudes, even though he does have respect for Wolverine (Razor's favorite X-Man to joke about is Storm. He constantly refers to her as Tina Turner as a joke.). 

Chapter 1: Prelude to Problems!

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(The Pit, Medical Ward)

Kyle James Wildfire, the cocky Boston-born electrokinetic codenamed Thunderbolt, walked into the GI Joe Medical Bay. He was holding his arm, bloodied because he got it gashed. And today, for unknown reasons, he was in a particularly foul mood today.

"Hey!" He called into the room. "The Thunderbolt's arm is causing the Thunderbolt to bleed to death! Lifeline! Bree!"

"They're not here." An unfamiliar voice said. Kyle walked in and found a girl clad in a backless green-and-black uniform with high white boots and green visor, and her hair in a blond bob. However, she appeared to be Indian, and she had flesh-colored antenna, solid green eyes, and insect-like wings sprouting from her back. Kyle jumped back a bit.

"**What the $%#& are _you_?**" Kyle hollered. "What are you?! Some kind of reject from a cheap monster movie?! Who is the dead monkey behind this sick joke?! Oh I'll bet that jabroni Sushi is behind this! Oh when I get my hands on him, I'm gonna fry his…" Kyle snarled, electricity building up around his free fist. "Where is he, bug-girl?" The insect-girl picked up a clipboard.

"Kyle Wildfire." She read from a file. "Alias Thunderbolt. A member of the West Coast Misfits. You can fly, and create and shape electricity. Caution must be taken because subject has great power, big mouth, and hot temper." She smiled. "No kidding." She looked up at Kyle. "Lina Chakram. They call me Dragonfly. I'm the new medic."

"Whoopie." Kyle grumbled, jumping on the bed. Kyle tended to look down on medics. "That idiot Sunfire slashed my arm with his katana! He was trying to kill me!" 

"From what I heard, he accidentally slashed it." Lina examined Kyle's arm. "It's not too bad."

"NOT TOO BAD?! WHAT KIND OF A MEDIC ARE YOU!?!?" Kyle roared in her face. "I NEARLY _BLED TO DEATH_ HERE, YOU STUPID BUG!!!" Lina cleaned her ears. She was warned about Kyle's temper and his mouth, but he seemed really angry today, like he was in a terrible mood. "Since you know so much about the Thunderbolt, you can tell me about your powers." 

"I can fly, my wings can slice steel as well as generate powerful winds accompanied by a sonic blast if they flap fast enough, and I have this." She spat some of her healing silk on Kyle. The wrestler's son wretched.

"That's _sick! Get it off! Yech, that's **disgusting**!_" Kyle hollered.

"It's not spit, Blunderbolt. It's silk. My silk has healing abilities." Lina smiled. Kyle smirked outwardly, but he seethed inwardly. He _HATED_ being called "Blunderbolt". 

"Goody. Those wings can slice steel?" Kyle asked. 

"Yes." Lina replied, walking to get a bandage to help Kyle heal. Kyle laughed.

"Well then, the Thunderbolt would love to see you slash some Cobra heads off with those things!" Kyle grinned. Lina turned to him and shook her head.

"No." She said. "I'm a medic. I'm a non-combatant. I'm not a fighter." Kyle's face paled. He looked horrified and disappointed. For some reason, he felt his blood boil. He felt this surge of anger towards her.

"Really?" Kyle said darkly. "That's a shame. But you know what they say…" Lina blinked. 

"What?" 

"That it's not the powers, it's the willingness to use them." Kyle warned. "The Thunderbolt believes that sometime, the only way to stop something or solve a problem is to resort to violence." He added the last part as a joke: "If you don't have to, resort to it anyway." Lina shook her head.

"That's not a very wise philosophy, Kyle." She said, wrapping the bandage. 

"So you _are_ a coward." Kyle shook his head. "Figures. At least Lifeline had the guts to face Sabertooth." 

"I'm not Lifeline. And just because I'm a medic, that does not mean I am a coward." Lina said. Kyle walked away.

"Whatever." He waved.

"Wait, Kyle…" Lina realized. "You're on the West Coast Team! Why are you in the Pit?" 

"Ahh, the Malibu Joes and us are here to help protect some funny-looking device. They call it the B.L.T. or somethin'." Kyle grumbled. On the way out, down the hall near the infirmary, Kyle ran into his older brother Jake.

"Hey Kyle." The East Coast Misfit codenamed Red Dragon said. "What's up? I see you met our new medic." 

"Yeah." Kyle shrugged. "She seems like a bit of a chicken to me. You know, the type that runs away at the sight of their own shadow?"

"Kyle, she's had it rough." Jake said. "Her parents disowned her and said she was a monster." 

"HA!" Kyle laughed. "She couldn't scare that jabroni Duncan Matthews! And **everything** spooks that dumb ape!" Kyle laughed. Jake noticed the bandage.

"What happened?" Jake nodded at the bandage. Kyle looked at it.

"Ah, that screwy Sushi tried to take my arm off." 

"Funny. According to _Toshi_, you scared the bejesus out of him when you stomped into the dojo, yelling and screaming for no reason." Jake chuckled. Kyle glared.

"Look Jake, I am **not** in a good mood." Kyle growled.

"I noticed." Jake said. "What's wrong?" 

"I'm fine." Kyle stomped away. Jake shook his head. He knew his younger brother. He knew that Kyle had always had a bit of a short fuse. But something must've **_really_** got under his skin to bother him like this. He knew Sunfire and Thunderbolt never got along, but that was because they never could see eye-to-eye on anything, not because of hatred. _I'll go talk to Toshiro. Maybe Sunfire knows something about this whole thing._ Jake walked off, looking for the Solar Samurai.

Well, things are certainly off to a rough start. Why does Thunderbolt not like Dragonfly? What's with his mood? What are the West Coast Misfits and the Malibu Joes helping the East Coast Misfits and the Pit Joes protecting? What is Cobra up to? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!


	2. West Coast Coffee Craziness!

GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!

To Red Witch: Yeah, I guess Virus seems to be slowly losing his grip on reality as my stories progress. You do have a point.

To RogueFanKC: No, Kyle doesn't have a crush on Lina. In fact, he _loathes_ her. He hates her, and knowing the Thunderbolt, he's not exactly going to be nice to people he doesn't like…

To Descendent: Well, here's some more insanity for you!

To Sparky Genocide: I doubt Golobulus could create something like Apocalypse. I do need some ideas for rawhides in the Beach-Head rawhide scene.

To Raliena: Glad you like it! Here's some craziness for you!

To Wizard1: Well, think about it! Kyle likes to fight, Lina doesn't. Kyle's proud of the fact he fights, Lina doesn't like to fight. There you go.

If I didn't respond to your review, I'm sorry! My dad took the family PC for repairs and it should be back Wednesday at the earliest, so I was unable to see any new reviews. I'm writing from a laptop computer and unless I'm near my campus, I can't access the Internet on it. Thanks for Understanding!

It's Profile Time Again! This time, we look at another member of Kid Razor's world, a character who will be revealed here, Sonic Blue! 

Sonic Blue

Real Name: Spencer Burton

Class: Technology User

Affliation: Ex-Kid Razor villain, now-Kid Razor ally, honorary Avenger

Hair: Brown

Eyes: Blue

Powers: Sonic Blue's powers come purely from his light, yet tough armor. In the original Sonic Blue armor, Burton can reach speeds of 150 mph. (Burton constantly modifies the armor, and its top speed has increased now to a little over 350 mph). From his hands, he can generate powerful blue blasts or beams of sonic energy similar to the sonic blasts that the mutants known as Banshee and Siryn can create. His armor enhances his reflexes and reaction time to match his speed. His armor also grants him slight superhuman strength, able to lift 2 tons (Burton doesn't mind. He designed his armor for more for speed than power). The armor also allows protection from small-arms fire as well as blows from superhumanly strong foes to a point.

Recently, Burton has modified his armor with nanotechnology, allowing it to be more compact than ever, and to repair itself, and his body, even in the middle of battle at an accelerated rate

Birthplace: Cincinnati, Ohio

Bio: Born to a poor single mother, one would think that at first sight, Spencer Burton was your average teenager. However, he was born with an extraordinary gift: His mind. Spencer's IQ has been tested to be over 350, making him a super-genius. However, due to his family's finances, he was unable to go to special schools. Undaunted, Spencer spent time at the library and on the Internet, learning a variety of subjects. The subjects that interested him the most were robotics, electronics, and mechanics.

This knowledge ended up changing his life when a near-tragedy struck him. Spencer's beloved mother Delilah was diagnosed with cancer. Unable to afford treatment, Spencer became desperate. Using his knowledge, Spencer built a suit of armor out of parts he salvaged from a junkyard.

Coming to Cleveland to test the armor, Spencer ran afoul of the mutated reptile expert Dr. Reptile, and the psychotic composer, the Maestro. The two villains convinced him to help them embark on a crime spree. They promised him a cut, but they actually planned to double-cross him and use him as the fall guy. Kid Razor intercepted them during the spree. While he brawled with Dr. Reptile and Maestro, Spencer took the cash and ran, hoping to race back home. However, Razor caught up with him using his Bon Jovi Booster. Spencer explained he was desperate, and he needed the money for his mother's treatment. Razor said he'd help Spencer only if the armored hero surrendered the armor and turned himself in. Spencer agreed, and Razor kept his word by holding a fundraiser concert.

Due to the circumstances of Spencer's case, Burton only served several weeks of community service and he was allowed to have his armor back only if he found some good use for it. Burton gladly agreed, and went home to Cincinnati to start a career as a crimefighter. 

When Selene caused a tremendous fire throughout Cleveland and several supervillains (Including the Wrecking Crew, the Maestro, and the Absorbing Man) to run rampant due to her magic, the Avengers responded (in the Evo-verse, the Misfits and the X-Men helped as well), and Sonic Blue offered to help. The incident became known as the Cleveland Inferno, and Sonic Blue, for his service, was given honorary membership in the Avengers. 

Sonic Blue remains in Cincinnati, defending his hometown from evil.

Chapter 2: West Coast Coffee Craziness!

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(The Pit)

"What is this thing?" Velocity pointed at some schematics. He and the other West Coast Misfits were hanging out in one of the Pit's meeting rooms. 

"It's called the Broadcast Energy Transmitter, or B.E.T." Siryn remembered, lounging on a couch. "It's some kinda energy generator thing. I cannae remember." The kids were bored. Ali was playing with light flashes, Rahne was asleep, Ace kept scratching pictures of burgers and guitars on the wall with his claw, Terrell was trying to read the schematics, Proudstar played harmonica, Tommy chewed gum, X23 was giving juggling a try, Sunfire was meditating, and Rictor was building a house of cards. 

"Hey Tommy, what was with the new codename?" Rictor asked the shark-teen. Tommy Sharpe changed his codename from Shark Man to Chilljaw.

"I thought Chilljaw would be a better codename." Tommy shrugged. 

"I think it's nice." Ali said.

"A lot better than Shark Man." X23 nodded in agreement.

"Me bored. Ace bored. A bored Ace is not a happy Ace." Ace murmured. "Ace go eat." Almost like a feral zombie, the lion-like rocker staggered out of the room. "Ace eat. Ace need food. Ace hungry."

"Ace always hungry." X23 rolled her eyes.

"I'll come too." Ali agreed, following Ace. She also did a zombie walk.

"What is this, the Ministry of Silly Walks?" Rahne scratched her head.

"Who wants to do a silly walk?" Proudstar raised his arm tiredly.

"Okay." The kids shrugged. The kids were all so bored, they'd gladly do silly walks. They all walked out of the room, doing a silly walk. Kicker and Lady Jaye noticed.

"Never let those kids get bored." Lady Jaye said. Kicker nodded in confusion.

"Uh huh." She agreed. The West Coast Misfits silly-walked to the cafeteria, where Ace stumbled upon a canister of something.

"Hey guys, BA's infamous coffee." Ace grinned.

"What's coffee?" X23 wondered.

"Yo, I heard that stuff is against the Geneva Convention, man!" Terrell gulped nervously.

"I heard from Lance that stuff is muy powerful, man." Rictor said in awe.

"Crikey! By thunder, that's the infamous coffee!" Tommy chuckled.  

"Oh man, I had that stuff once. Mighty powerful." Rahne blinked. "Makes ye go mad." 

"Sure, Rahne." Ali said sarcastically.

"No way that coffee can be _that_ powerful!" Siryn chuckled. 

"I have a bad feeling about this." Toshiro gulped.

"Ahh, let's try it! How bad can it be?" Proudstar smirked. A few minutes later, one could spot Dial-Up and Psyche-Out talking.

"I'm very concerned about Kyle." The communications specialist said to the psychiatrist. "I've noticed he's been more confrontational than usual lately." 

"Maybe it may have something to do with his powers. Jake told me that soon after his powers emerged, he felt a great evil forming within him. It's obvious what _that_ ended up becoming." Psyche-Out replied.

"Yeah. Draconis." Dial-Up gulped nervously. She wasn't there when Draconis revealed himself to the mutants, but from what he heard, Draconis was extremely dangerous. He was like the Hulk, only more intelligent, more ferocious, and none of the humanity the Hulk had. "If Draconis is so dangerous, I wonder why no one's bothered to…" She was cut off by the sound of a _YEEEEEEEEEE-**HAHHHHHHHHHHH**_ from the cafeteria. Dial-Up and Psyche-Out looked at each other.

"Uh-oh." They said together as they peeked in. 

"Hey guys! Lookie what I can do!" A hyper Ali laughed. Tommy pitched a plate in the air, and Ali blasted it with a yellow beam of laser light from her hands. The West Coast Misfits were all hyped up on BA's coffee.

"Since when could Dazzler do _that?_" Dial-Up blinked. The kids were in BA's coffee: Rahne leapt around in wolf form, Theresa flew around singing, X23 was doing backflips up and down the wall, Terrell was racing around in a circle saying "You guys" over and over, Thunderbird and Rictor were stomping around throwing things, Ace was skittering on the ceiling, Tommy spat ice water, creating a ramp for skateboarding.

"Whoo-hoo!" Tommy laughed as he boarded and Dazzler blasted. Toshi was throwing fireballs everywhere. 

"Alright, where are those…" Kyle peeked in. "HEY! You Jabronis drank BA's coffee without me! That's it! I'm gonna beat up Dragonfly! This was her fault!" Kyle growled.

Well, things are getting weird. What is the Broadcast Energy Transmitter? What does it do? Will Cobra come after it? What more insanity will happen? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!


	3. New Villains!

GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!

Okay, we're going to the movie! Enjoy this!

To Raliena: Glad you and your friend like the story! I don't know where your school is, so I can't send coffee! Sorry!

To Sparky Genocide: Huh. Those are some funny ideas. I'll see what I can do.

To JCKIDSMART: Glad to see you, and there will be some fights in the future.

To Aaron: Well, Kyle really doesn't know Lifeline.

To Red Witch: Glad you like the story! I've only seen the movie once or twice along. BTW, what inspired you to create Dragonfly?

To Wizard1: Well, with Kyle, who knows. Maybe he'll end up with his own version of Draconis. I dunno. I was struggling for ideas, so I did the silly walks bit.

To Metal Dragon1: Read the new chapter of your story and loved it! And maybe it is just too much electricity. Glad you like Tommy's new codename and about BR, Firestorm, and BA's coffee, you do **NOT** wanna know. Trust me.

It's Profile Time again! Now we look at a Malibu Joe who's as cool as ice whether at the radio or outside it, the wonderous Dial-Up!

Dial-Up

Real Name: Rumiko Watanabe

Nationality: Japanese (She had to obtain American citizenship to join the Navy, so she is technically Japanese-American. She still has her native passport)

Affiliation: United States Navy (Formerly worked for the Japanese government as an operative).

Primary Military Specialty: Communications Specialist

Secondary Military Specialty: Gunner's Mate, Machinist 

Birthplace: Unknown (But she was born in the main island of Japan)

Bio: Dial-Up comes from a long line of samurai, and is trained in Bushido. She also grew up near an American army base, so she learned both English and Japanese as a child. Her father was a local businessman and her mother was a homemaker. When she saw ships sail into harbors as a girl, she wanted to live a life on the sea, despite her father's disapproval. She also had developed an interest in radios, constantly tinkering with them.

At some point in her life, Dial-Up worked for the Japanese government as an agent, and was one of their best. She would eventually join the United States Navy, and work in the communications room, which she enjoyed, even though her cool expression seemed to betray no emotion. 

When recruited to GI Joe, Dial-Up struck a friendship with the GI Joe Dial-Tone due to their mutual interest in communications equipment. When she was sent to Malibu Base, her beauty caught the eye of the Malibu Joes' practical joker, Jester. Jester constantly flirts with Dial-Up, much to her chagrin. She often seems to show no emotion, a look she claims to have practiced since a child, but when she's angry, the object of her anger often ends up often ends up with a foot in the mouth. She secretly is a huge fan of the Lethal Weapon films, because she adores action/comedy movies.

Chapter 3: New Villains!

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(A base in the Alps)

"Man, I can't believe this." Jester chuckled to Dial-Up. "Look at all those kids." The two Malibu Joes watched the members of the East Coast and West Coast Misfits brawl in a field. It was another of their team-wide arguments.

"Tell me about it." Cover Girl noted as she walked up to the twosome. "I remember when it was just Althea. Then we got the Triplets. Then Claudius. Then Toad & Beaky. Then Blob, Avalanche, Quicksilver, and the Scarlet Witch. Then Starchild and Darkstar. Then Pyro. Then Red Dragon. Then Lila Cheney. And now Dragonfly."

"And let us forget the West Coast Team." Dial-Up nodded. "First it was just Siryn, X23, Dazzler, Wolfsbane, Thunderbird, Thunderbolt, Sunfire, Wildstar, and Velocity. Then we got Rictor. And of course we got Shark Man, who now goes by Chilljaw." 

"How many kids is that?" Jester counted on his fingers. "Whoa. 17 East Coasters to 11 West Coasters. We need to catch up fast!" 

"Almost 30 mutant kids." Dial-Up chuckled. "Of course, the X-Men don't exactly consist a small number either. The Professor, Storm, Wolverine, Angel, Beast, Cyclops, Jean Grey, Rogue, Foxfire, Nightcrawler, Shadowcat, Gambit, Colossus and Psylocke make up the main team. And there's the New Mutants: Cannonball, Iceman, Magma, Multiple, Boom-Boom, Mirage, Berzerker, Husk, Bedlam, and Sunspot." Jester counted on his fingers as Dial-Up spoke. "That makes 24, Jester."

"Oh, thanks." Jester scratched his chin. "Well, that makes it almost even." He then thought about each of the powers the kids had. "Hey! Between the mutants of the X-Men, our Misfits, and your Misfits, we have practically every special power under the sun!" 

"How did we end up with so many kids?" Cover Girl scratched her head. 

"Tell us about it." Jester grinned, putting his arm around Dial-Up's shoulders. The Japanese Joe glared at the pranking pilot.

"If you wish to wake up the next day with both your arms attached to you, you will take your arm off me." Dial-Up warned sternly. Jester quickly moved his arm with an innocent grin.

"Sorry."

"Good thing I don't have to play parent to _all_ of them." Cover Girl sighed gratefully. "Recondo has Paul, Craig, and Lila. Barbecue has Pyro. Airtight took Red Dragon in. I got Lina. Lina and Paul are sweet kids. Lina's a little bit shy, but she's sweet, and I think Freddy has a thing for her." Cover Girl chuckled. "She likes him."

"Thunderbolt _abhors_ her. Thinks she's a coward. She's back at the medlab." Dial-Up responded. "She takes her duties as a medic very seriously."

"She wants to be a doctor, but I think it's something her parents wanted her to do. Now, they think the only thing she'll do is try to enslave humanity."

"How could they just dump her? She can't help being a mutant…" Jester started.

"Any more than you can help being a knucklehead, Jester." Dial-Up smirked.

"Hey!"  

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(Cobra Base)

"Cobra Commander, you are a **_BUNGLER!!!_**" A voice roared. The gathered forces of Cobra and the Dreadnoks cringed. A tall, muscular, imposing man walked into the room: Serpentor. Technically, he was Serpentor III. The first one was destroyed, and thanks to a screw-up by the Dreadnoks, Serpentor II became a drag performer.

"Serpentor?!" Cobra Commander said in shock. "But that's impossible! You can't be Serpentor! You're in men's clothing!" 

"I must admit, this is a pleasant surprise." The Baroness chuckled.

"Man, Mindbender must be smoking some freaky stuff to make him try _this_ again." Zanya whispered to Leathersuit, make the alligator-like Dreadnok chuckle. Serpentor III was oblivious to this. What everyone else was oblivious to was a weird eye poking out of the water. Except for Virus, who noticed out of the corner of his eye. However, the mentally ill genius decided to ignore it.

"Cobra Commander. Time and time again, you have failed to destroy GI Joe and their pathetic mutant charges!" Serpentor snapped. 

"There are so many of them!" Torch whined. "I mean, it's bad enough that we have those bloody Joes and the Misfits, but now there's more of both!" 

"There is a West Coast Misfit team now, and the Malibu Joes." Baroness said to the artificial snake warrior.

_What was Mindbender **thinking** trying this again? I've heard the phrase "Third time's the charm", but this is ridiculous!_ Destro grumbled. He then heard something bubble out of the water nearby the base. "What was that?" The Cobras turned around and saw a shocking sight: It appeared to be a woman, clad in a long black cape and odd purple swirly costume. Her skin was green, her eyes were snakelike, her face had pink markings around the eyes, and she was bald except for a long ponytail of green hair. 

"P-p-p-p-p-p-Pythona…" Cobra Commander whispered under his breath. The woman walked slowly over the water, towards the Cobras.

"_TOAD!!!!!_" Virus roared, grabbing a chainsaw and racing towards her. "_DIE AGENT OF TOAD!!!!_"  The snake-woman sneered, and clicked her fingers. A huge man clad in a pink costume with silver armbands and boots with bat-like wings raced out of nowhere and slammed Virus hard, knocking the psycho into a wall, unconscious. The other Dreadnoks ran to help out their comrade.

"Thank you Nemesis Enforcer. That one is very sick in mind." The snake-woman said to the large man. Nemesis Enforcer was a genetic creation. He was created to be an "Ultimate Warrior". 

"What do you want, Pythona?!" Cobra Commander snarled.

"Silence, fool!" Serpentor III snapped. "I wish to hear the lady." 

Uh oh! We're in trouble now! Who's Pythona? What does she want with Cobra? What insanity will happen? Did anyone realizes there were lots of mutants around? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!


	4. Capture of Serpentor!

GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!

To Red Witch: So _that's_ where you got Dragonfly from. Huh. BTW, when I introduce my Rawhides, you may recognize a couple of them.

To Metal Dragon1: Yeah, the third Serpentor is born! What would happen if he met the less stable Joes? Who knows, man. Who knows. And what do you have planeed for the next chapter of "Take the Long Way Home"? Read the new chapter and loved it!

To Wizard1: When is Chapter Four of "Kareoke Dance Party" coming up? I WANNA READ IT!!!!

To Aaron: I doubt Nemesis Enforcer can hold out long against Jake. In his Dragon Mode, Jake gets stronger the more he fights. Nemesis will last a while, but Jake will in the end get enough strength to beat him down. I do plan to stay true to the movie. I've only seen it once or twice myself.

To Sparky Genocide: I think that's funny about Serpentor III being made from various teen celebs. As for your Firester/Pyro/Sunfire thing, I don't know. I'll see. As for the new recruits, you'll find out when you meet my Rawhides! They're a mix of "new" Joes, and mutants! 

It's Profile Time Again! *Crowd cheers* This time, we look at a Joe with more hobbies than a collector's store! Ladies and gents, meet Red Dragon's handler: Airtight!

Airtight

Real Name: Kurt Schnurr

Affiliation: Army

Rank: E-4

Primary Military Specialty: CBR (Chemical, Biological, and Radiological) Warfare.

Secondary Military Specialty: Ordinance, Misfit Handler (Red Dragon)

Birthplace: New Haven, Conneticut

Bio: As a kid, Airtight was considered weird. And who could blame him: He raises scorpions, collected plastic dinosaurs, played odd jokes, and even managed to get a tiger shark! 

As intelligent as he is weird, Airtight grew fascinated with CBR weapons, and studied them in the Army. In GI Joe, he managed to collect quite an impressive batch of samples of various CBR weapons. He also grew to love wrestling, and he manages to start various collections, from normal ones like baseball cards, to weird ones like fungus. 

In possession of his own lab, Airtight was made the handler of the Misfit Jake Wildfire, codename Red Dragon. A wrestling fan, Airtight was thrilled. Under Airtight, Jake's main duty is to help Airtight around the lab, and to help care for Toothy, a velociraptor-like creature. Toothy was born when Craig Starr, the Misfit codenamed Darkstar, blasted a muffin made by X-Man Kitty Pryde, codename Shadowcat, with his eye laser. The molecules of the badly-made muffin and the laser formed DNA and Toothy was born.

Airtight is also a very big practical joker.   

Chapter 4: Capture of Serpentor!

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(Cobra Base)

"What do you want?" Serpentor III asked Pythona. The snake-like sorceress smirked.

"I come from Cobra-La." Pythona smirked.

"Cobra-La?" Leathersuit asked. "Sounds like some planet from a cheesy sci-fi B-movie." Pythona raised an eyebrow at the alligator-like teenage Dreadnok.

"Cobra-La is an ancient civilization driven underground by man. We require a device."

"What are you taking about?" Zartan wondered.

"The Broadcast Energy Transmitter. The humans known as GI Joe have one."

"Virus could _build_ a Broadcast Energy Transmitter for you." Zartan grumbled. "So why should we steal it from GI Joe?"

"I do not trust the inventor." Pythona said. "I sense his mind. It's chaotic. Too dysfunctional. Typical of the state of the severely mentally ill." 

"We know Virus is sick in the head. You don't need to remind us." Serpentor III grumbled.

"Besides, you wish to see GI Joe destroyed as much as we do." Pythona added.

"You do have a point." Serpentor nodded.

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(GI Joe Base, the Alps)

"Well, is the BET hooked up?" Duke asked a Malibu Joe with short black hair and clad in a blue uniform with brown boots and backwards blue cap. He had appeared to be in his late thirties. He was born Eddie Polanski, a Marine from Seattle, Washington. His codename was Fusebox, the Joe electrician. He could fix anything that needed an electrical current. 

"Got it boss." Fusebox shut the panel. "All our weapons are connected to this thing. Man, I tell you, this B.E.T. thing could power all of Malibu for a year! I'm surprised that Cobra's not going to come after this thing."

"I wouldn't count them out for long." Duke sighed. "Heaven knows they'll be here soon to try and get their claws on this thing."

"I'd like to see them try. We got almost 30 hyperactive mutant kids just waiting to do _something_ with their time." Fusebox chuckled.

"CHILLJAW!!! GET OUT OF THE POOL!!! AND STOP EATING THE LIFE PRESERVERS!!!!!" The voice of Beach-Head yelled.

"ACE, STOP SHOWING OFF THOSE LETTERS!!!! YOU NEARLY GAVE TWELVE JOES HEART ATTACKS WITH THOSE!!!!!!!" Lady Jaye screamed.

"WHO GAVE THE WEST COAST KIDS COFFEE?!" Hardcase roared. "VELOCITY'S RUNNING AROUND, STARTING TORNADOS OVER HERE!!!" Suddenly, the "tranquility" was interrupted.

"**_COOOOOOOOBRAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!_**" Serpentor cried as he rode to the base on a HISS Tank. There were also numerous other tanks and planes all ready to attack.

"It's Cobra! They're after the BET!!!" Duke yelled. A blast knocked Duke and Fusebox away from the BET. The electrician was knocked out, and Duke was on his back. "Ohhhhh…"

"Got him!" Wild Weasel grinned. "Now to get the BET and uh oh." He noticed a certain blond girl clad in a green-and-yellow costume fly to him. 

"**_WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!_**" Siryn wailed, her sonic beam shattering the Rattler.

"AAAGH!!!! MY BUTT!!!!!" Wild Weasel screamed. Turns out ol' Serpentor underestimated the might of the Joes and two teams of Misfits. The planes ended being assaulted by Red Dragon, Sunfire, Thunderbolt, and Siryn. The other Misfits helped deal with the ground troops.

"Hey jabroni!" Kyle called at Serpentor III. "What is your name?"

"I am…"

"**IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOUR NAME IS!!!! KNOW YOUR ROLE AND SHUT YOUR MOUTH!!!!**" Kyle nailed Serpentor with a thunder-charged slap. Serpentor staggered a bit, and smirked. 

"I am quite stronger than the other two." He chuckled. Kyle grimaced. He slapped Serpentor again. 

"You're still just a stupid jabroni!" Kyle sneered. He slapped Serpentor one more time. "How ya like that Jabroni? Yeah, I'm Rick James, %$#&@!!!!"

"HA!!" Thunderbird leapt up and slammed Serpentor III hard with a shoulder tackle, knocking him to a cage of flames created by Pyro.

"WHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!" Pyro cackled triumphantly. "Got you!" Serpentor snarled at the Australian. 

"As soon as I am free, you will be first to die." Serpentor said. Pyro giggled madly.

"I got you now, King of the Dryer Fairies!" John grinned maliciously. "I'm gonna make you pay for stealing all my socks for your world-conquering machine!" Serpentor blinked.

"You're as insane as that idiot Virus." 

"COBRA!!!!! RETREAT!!!!!!" Cobra Commander screamed. He knew that the Joes, with all the Misfits, were unstoppable at this point. Duke looked at Serpentor.

"Good job, Pyro." He complimented.

"Can I burn him?" John asked with a grin. 

"Maybe later." Duke shrugged. "Roadblock! Send a unit out there and find out where the heck they're going!" 

"You'll never defeat Cobra-La." Serpentor smirked.

"Cobra-La?" Duke asked.

"Sounds like one of Pyro's insane sleep-ramblings." Kyle sighed. "Anyway, where's that jabroni Dragonfly?" 

"Tending to the wounded." Thunderbird replied, pointing to Lina helping out Barbecue. Kyle walked to her.

"What were you _doing?!_ The Thunderbolt busts his butt, and you were just standing there doing nothing!" Kyle snapped. "You chicken!" 

"Lay off, Kyle." Barbecue said. "Thank you, Lina." 

"My pleasure." Lina smiled. "Hope you feel better."

"Listen you little bug." Kyle snarled. "I do not take too kindly to cowardice. You _ever_ pull that stunt again, and you'll get a million volts through you!" Kyle stomped away, leaving a confused Lina.

"What'd I do?" Lina asked Barbecue. The fireman shrugged. Pyro gleefully ran up to him.

"Guess what, Barbecue? I caught Serpentor and Duke said I can set him on fire later!" he giggled madly.

Hoo boy. Things are going up now? What'll the Joes do with Serpentor? How will the bad guys react? Will Kyle ever accept Lina? What'll the Joes do? Can they protect the BET? What'll happen next? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!


	5. New Problems!

GI Joe, The Movie: Evo-tized!

Disclaimer: I'm sorry if I forgot. I own nothing except what I created.

To Wizard1: Yeah, CC will never be the same. Virus is slowing losing his grip on reality as we go on. I don't know. When is Chapter 4 of "Kareoke Dance Party" coming up?!

To RogueFanKC: Yeah, I think someone does need to give Kyle a hard slap in the face. Don't worry about it. I do plan to have some Fred/Kyle conflict.

To Red Witch: Oh I think Kyle is in big trouble indeed. Big trouble.

To descendant: Yeah, Dave Chappelle is very funny. I loved the Rick James sketches he did. I love South Park too. Do you like South Park? My favorite character is Tweek. He's a laugh riot: "TOO MUCH PRESSURE!!! AAGH!!!"

To Haretrigger: I aim to please. Hope you read and enjoy my other stories!

It's Profile Time Again! *Crowd hoots, hollers, cheers, and claps* This time, we look at a Joe who's a deadly as she is pretty, one of the most important, and one of the original members of the GI Joe team, the scintillating Scarlett!

Scarlett

Real Name: Shana O'Hara

Affiliation: Army

Rank: Master Sergeant

Primary Military Specialty: Intelligence

Secondary Military Specialty: Classified

Birthplace: Atlanta, Georgia.

Bio: At first glance, one would expect Scarlett to be a southern belle, based on her name and birthplace. However, Scarlett is a living weapon, a special agent with almost superhuman talents.

A bit of a tomboy, Scarlett, like the Misfits Red Dragon and Thunderbolt, was born into a family of warriors. Her father and three older brothers were all martial-arts instructors. At age 9, she began her training herself. She was so talented, she gained her first black belt at only 15! She was not just talented in body, but also in mind. She graduated magna cum laude from two Ivy League Universities, and she excelled in training courses offered by _all four_ branches of the armed forces, including Covert Ops School, Marine Sniper School, Special Air Service School, and the Marine Tae Kwon Do symposium.

Among the many weapons she's qualified for, Scarlett is qualified for her specialty and favorite weapon: the XK-1 Power Crossbow.

In GI Joe, she quickly became one of their most vital members, commanding missions from the beginning of her tenure. She thinks of Clutch as a chauvinist because of his antagonistic behavior, and she's the object of affection of both Duke and the ninja Snake-Eyes.

As for her relationship with the Misfits, she loves the kids, but wishes they weren't so crazy! Scarlett has bonded with Red Dragon, considering he also came from a family of warriors in a way. Jake came from a family of pro wrestlers. He recently converted Scarlett to wrestling fandom.  

Chapter 5: New Problems!

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(The GI Joe base brig)

"You pitiful humans shall pay!" Serpentor roared at his guards. Alpine, Bazooka, and Gung-Ho was guarding him alongside Thunderbird, Blob, Velocity, Quicksilver, Sunfire, Scarlet Witch, and Thunderbolt.

"Yeah, yeah." Alpine waved off the comment.

"Too bad you didn't have too long to enjoy power, huh Serpy?" Gung-Ho grinned. Meanwhile, Fred and Kyle were talking.

"Look Thunderbolt, I can't stand the way you treat Lina! She has feelings too!" Fred snapped.

"Yeah: Frightened, terrified, and afraid!" Kyle grumbled.

"That's not funny Kyle!" Fred snapped. Kyle snarled.

"I'm not _being_ funny, Fred. I'm being serious. She doesn't belong here. She's no warrior." Kyle growled.

"She fights death and disease, Kyle. That's what she faces." Fred glared.

"BULL!!!" Kyle snapped. "The Misfits are a team! How can we be a team when one member refuses to do their part?! Let's say the Thunderbolt is surrounded by Vipers, guns locked and loaded. And the only one to help the Thunderbolt is Dragonfly." Kyle argued. "Let's just say the Thunderbolt will end up swiss cheese before Dragonfly helps him!" 

"That's not true, Kyle! Just because she doesn't like to fight, that doesn't make her a coward!" Blob snapped.

"Yeah, it makes her a **CHICKEN!!!!**" Kyle snapped. 

"Not all problems can be solved with fists, Kyle." Blob warned.

"Oh coming from a former bully, that says something alright!" Kyle snapped.

"I had issues, okay?!" 

"Yeah, like your taste in women." Kyle smirked. "First, the Red Menace, than the Kentucky Fried Insect!"

"**_DON'T YOU CALL HER THAT!!!!!!!_**" Blob throttled Kyle. The other Misfits pried the two apart. 

"Save it for Cobra!" Thunderbird snapped. 

"Kyle, back off!" Wanda ordered. 

"Hello everyone." Lina smiled as she walked in. She was carrying a plate full of sandwiches. "I made these for everyone."

"It can cook." Kyle grumbled under his breath. He snatched a sandwich, glaring at Lina.

"Thank her, Kyle!" Blob ordered sharply. Kyle just walked away, ignoring the large mutant. 

"Sorry about Kyle." Toshi bowed to Lina. "He has acted rather unusual all day."

"I'm so sorry, Lina. I don't know why Kyle hates you so much." Fred apologized. Lina shrugged.

"He's irritated about something." Lina shrugged. In the shadows, Kyle watched her hatefully. His eyes glowed yellow.

"You will fight, Lina. Or else I'll make sure you'll never be able to breathe on your own again." His brown hair turned black and his eyes' glow darkened from yellow to blue briefly before turning back to their normal colors. "You do not deserve to be a Misfit, and I will make you realize it. You do not belong. You are no warrior. I will make sure you regret joining us."

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(The mountains of the Alps)

Roadblock, Quick-Kick, Bulldog, Lady Jaye, Jester, Rock 'n' Roll, and Lionheart followed the retreating Cobra forces in a scouting vehicle. 

"Where the bloody heck are they heading?" Lionheart wondered.

"I got a bad feeling about this." Jester said. 

"Let's not lose our mind, or else us Cobra will find." Roadblock ordered.

"Aw man, look!" Rock 'n' Roll noticed the Cobras went into a cavern.

"Let's go! Yo Joe!" Lady Jaye ordered. The Joes drove into the cavern. They found themselves in an odd place. It looked like a pink-and-red-shaded alien landscape, with weird glowing pods and strange vegetation. "Where are we?" 

"It looks like another planet." Bulldog said. 

"Cobra-La." A voice hissed. The seven turned around and saw Pythona and Nemesis Enforcer. 

"Who are _you?_" Roadblock snapped. 

"I am Pythona, and this is my associate, Nemesis Enforcer." The snake-like sorceress motioned to Nemesis Enforcer. The winged humanoid snarled. Bulldog and Lionheart leapt out of the jeep, ready for a fight. Bulldog cricked his neck, and Lionheart activated her laser claws. A snarling Nemesis Enforcer took down the two mutant Joes easy before they had a chance to attack.

"Bulldog! Lionheart!" The other Joes raced to their fallen comrades.

"They say mutants are the next stage in human evolution." Pythona sneered. "Evidently the mutants haven't evolved enough." 

"Fire!" Roadblock ordered. The other Joes fired their weapons, but the tracer bullets bounced off the winged creature's extremely tough hide. Energy built up around Pythona's hands, and she fired it at the Joes, knocking them out. The two marched to the Joes.

"You humans will never be able to stop us. And even your next stage, the mutants, will be exterminated." Pythona smirked.

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(GI Joe base)

"I'm so worried. I hope Mac is okay." Kicker paced up and down the Joe quarters. 

"I'm sure he's fine." Lila shrugged. "He's tough."

"Yeah, you worry too much." Ali grinned. She looked at her hands. "Man, I get _another_ power. First, the forcefields, now the lasers! What's next?" 

"When I read your code, I noticed your great potential." Xi said. "Those lasers are powerful now, and they'll get stronger as you get older. I also read that you may be able to learn to create holograms." Ali blinked.

"Wow." Ali said. "And I thought all I could do was create light tricks." 

"No." Xi shook his head. "You probably belived your powers were weak because of the way you used them before joining us."

"Yeah, I used them to create light shows." Ali blinked. 

"Hey, Farrah! Xi, Lila." Wipe-Out grinned as he walked in. Ali rolled her eyes.

"Hi, Wipe-Out." Ali greeted. Wipe-Out was fond of calling Ali Blaire "Farrah" for obvious reasons. "Hey dude, you guys will be getting some new recruits! One of them's my cousin!" 

"You mean Jack, the guy who could turn into any animal?" Ali remembered. 

"Yup. He wanted to join the Misfits. Here's a picture of him." Wipe-Out handed the kids a picture of Jack. He looked like an 18-year-old version of Wipe-Out.

"Are all your family cloned?" Lila raised a black eyebrow.

Well, things are getting interesting? What madness will happen next? What is Jack's codename? Will the captured Joes be freed? Will Cobra come after Serpentor III? Can the Joes and the two Misfit teams stop Pythons and Nemesis Enforcer? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!


	6. Reactions and New Recruits!

GI Joe, the Movie: Evo-tized!

To Wizard1: Can't wait for the new chapter! Why is Kyle so hard on Lina? Well, remember when she described her powers in the first chapter? Kyle thinks her powers will make her a great fighter. However, she doesn't want to fight, so Kyle thinks she's going to just let her potential go to waste. Yes, according to jake, one of Draconis' first signs of his existence was his taking over Jake's body and brutally injuring a girl because she turned him down to a dance.

To Sparky Genocide: DUDE!!! Oh, there will be new Misfits.

To Red Witch:  Perhaps. We'll just have to wait and see.

To Metal Dragon1: Hey dude, when's the next chapter of "Take the Long Way Home" going to come up? What do you have planned next?

It's Profile Time Again! *Crowd hoots, hollers, screams, and claps* This time, we look at another one of the Joe caretakers, Spirit!

Spirit

Real Name: Charles Iron-Knife

Affiliation: Army

Rank: Sergeant First Class

Primary Military Specialty: Infantry, Tracker

Secondary Military Specialty: Social Services, Cartographer

Birthplace: Taos, New Mexico

Bio: A Native American, Spirit was born so far below the poverty line, no one in his family realized they were poor! Born near the Grand Canyon, Spirit proved to have an almost uncanny talent for direction and exploration. In the tradition of his ancestors, Spirit was raised to connect with nature and have respect for it. He also was trained as a shaman, or a holistic healer.

In high school, he earned some extra money working as a hunting guide. After graduation, he joined the Army, where he became a qualified sniper and served in Southeast Asia. When he returned home, he completed his education, earning a degree in psychology. He re-enlisted and was recruited to join GI Joe.

In GI Joe, Spirit became known as one of the team's most respected and honorable warriors. His life would change when he ended up caring for an abandoned and beaten Lance Alvers, codename Avalanche. Alvers' powers and mind were screwed around with by Magneto's usage of genetic enhancers and mind control drugs on him. After Alvers stood up to Magneto, Magneto left Lance to die in the desert, where Spirit found him alongside Dusty and Cross-Country.

Lance bonded with Spirit, and he became Avalanche's legal guardian. Spirit helped Lance trust humans, and it's believed that Spirit may be training Lance as a shaman.  

**A/N: L17 here! I'm going to screw around with the Joe Universe! Hey, if Red Witch could do it, so can I!**

Chapter 6: Reactions and New Recruits!

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"Come in! Roadblock! Come in!" Dial-Tone yelled into his head set. He and Dial-Up were in the base's communications center, and they had just lost contact with Roadblock's team. "Dial-Up, can you get Jaye?" The Japanese Joe shook her head angrily. She smacked the console, anger heating up her normally cool face, and she let out some curses in her native tongue. 

"I cannot track them!" She said with frustration. 

"We'll find them, Dial-Up. Don't worry." Dial-Tone reassured the Malibu Joe he took under his wing. She looked up at him.

"I'm…I'm…I'm concerned about Jester." She admitted. Dial-Tone chuckled.

"I thought you hated him." He laughed. Dial-Up shook her head. 

"Not in _that_ manner." She admitted. "I do find him annoying at times, with his lack of maturity."

"I know you, Dial-Up. I know you're a bit of a Jim Carrey fan." Dial-Tone smirked. "And I know that you _did_ find it funny when Jester TP'd Hardcase's home." Dial-Up sighed.

"I have to admit…" She sighed. "Jester is a good person underneath his endless joking around. I guess it'd be tough to imagine Malibu Base without him."

"Yeah, and Whithalf wouldn't be the same without his Morale Upkeep Officer." Dial-Tone chuckled. His face turned sad. "We have to report this to Hawk." Dial-Up nodded. When he turned, she looked up at the sky, and mentally whispered a small prayer in Japanese for her comrades, and for Jester.

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(The GI Joe base)

"**_WHAT?!?!_**" Kicker screamed. Hawk had just called her and told her Quick-Kick was now missing. "No! Hawk, that can't be true!" Hawk apologized on the other end. "No!" Ali, Lila, and Ace ran in. 

"Kicker, what's up?" Ace asked. A teary-eyed Kicker put down the phone. 

"Quick-Kick's missing." She sobbed. 

"What?!" Ali said.

"He went with Roadblock, Jaye, and some others to find out where Cobra retreated to. Dial-Up and Dial-Tone lost contact with them. The last report they got was they ended up in some weird cave that looked like a landscape from another planet…" Kicker looked like she was about to cry. The kids blinked in disbelief, especially Ace and Ali. Quick-Kick had become like a father to all the West Coast Misfits, and Kicker was the mother figure to them.

"Oh God…" Ali covered her mouth. Ace looked down at the ground.

"Is he alright?" 

"We don't know." Kicker covered her face. "We don't know." She sobbed. Ali hugged Kicker, tears flowing down her eyes. Ace went out to gather the other West Coast Misfits and tell them the news. 

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(Another part of the base)

"Alright, you slobs." Beach Head growled, looking over at the new recruits to the Misfit and Joe teams. He looked at clipboard as he looked at the new recruits. The first new recruit he looked at was a young man with semi-long blond hair, a green headband, and a uniform with various gadgets on it. "Sgt. David Lewinski, codename Hi-Tech. The new Operations Support Specialist, huh?" 

"That's me!" The blond man grinned. "I heard your laptop needed lookin' at. I'll look at it later for you." Beach Head blinked.

"Uhhhhh, thanks." Beach Head blinked. He looked at Hi-Tech's file. "Says here you're an X-Positive. A mutant."

"Actually, that's technical." Hi-Tech shrugged. "I'm not _really_ a mutant. As a kid, I messed around with my computer while it was on and some electronic parts, and one day: POW!!! Got struck by lightning. Hit me _and_ the electronic stuff. When I got out of the hospital, I discovered I had a weird mental power over electronic devices. Kept it secret my whole life. I leanred to never play with my electronic devices outside in the rain."

"Well, here we got quite a few mutants running around. Most of them are younger than you kid, but just as mature." Beach Head grumbled. He looked at the next candidate, a pretty young woman with short brown hair that went down to her chin. "Sgt. Paige Adams. Codename Mayday. Malibu Base's sniper. Says you're also an X-Positive."

"Unlike Techno-Master over here, I am a real mutant, sir." She replied. "Superhuman sight. It allows me improved visual range, natural night vision, and the ability to see radiation." 

"Maybe you should meet Low-Light. He'd love you." Beach Head grumbled. He looked over at the next recruit, a blonde woman in a gray uniform with a red bird on it. He smirked in recognition. "Finally did it, huh Janack?" 

"Yes, I made the team." The woman replied in an Eastern European accent. 

"You two know each other?" Hi-Tech asked, pointing at the blonde recruit and Beach Head.

"Yeah." Beach Head replied. "Daina L. Janack. You got the codename Vorona. Born in Ostrava in the Czech Republic. A former member of the Oktober Guard." 

"Oktober Guard?" Hi-Tech asked. 

"Ever heard of the Warsaw Pact?" Vorona asked. Hi-Tech nodded. "The Oktober Guard was the Warsaw Pact nations' version of GI Joe. Not nearly as numerous as this team. I heard rumors they're forming a new Guard with mutants. With them, I was a sniper, as well as a helicopter pilot."

"Not to mention you had a temper like a wild bull who hasn't slept or eaten in five days with a firecracker up its butt." Beach Head muttered.

"**_WHAT DID YOU SAY?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!_**" Vorona whirled around and roared in Beach Head's face, making him fall over.  

"Never mind." He grumbled as he got up. _She still has that temper. I think we're in trouble._ Beach Head sighed as he read the next report. He looked at the new Joe, a Hispanic man clad in a red-and-yellow fireproof suit with short curly black hair. He carried a flamethrower back similar to Pyro. "Eric Suarez, codename Burner. The Malibu Joes' new flamethrower."

"That's me, man!" He chuckled. "You name, I can toast it!"

"Speaking of toast, Pyro and Firestorm would love you, kid." Beach Head looked at a teen girl with red hair. "Angelica Jones, codename Firestar. You can generate beams of microwave energy and use microwave energy to fly."

"Hello." She waved. Next to her stood a girl, around 12. She had dark gray hair in a braid, light gray skin, and was clad in a Spider-Man t-shirt and jeans. 

"Olivia Osnick, codename Spyder." Beach Head looked wryly at her. "You essentially have a spider-based mutation." He chuckled. "Kinda short, aren't you _Ollie?_" The gray-skinned pre-teen grabbed Beach Head and pulled his face to hers, a fist under his nose.

"Call me _Spyder_ and I won't knock your nose off!" She said. Vorona laughed.

"Oh, now **_that's_** rich!" The Czech woman laughed. Beach Head rubbed his neck and looked at the next two recruits: Two blond kids. One looked like an 18-year-old version of Wipe-Out. The other was clad in a black uniform with a sash filled with pockets, a yellow 8-pointed star on the left breast, and his hands only had three fingers each. "Jack McCormick, codename Beast King. The ability to transform into any animal." He looked up and saw a gorilla staring at him! "_AIEEEEE!!!!!!!!_" Beach Head screamed. The gorilla turned back into a laughing Beast King.

"Whoa, dude!" Jack laughed. "You totally need to take a chill pill, man!" Beach Head glared.

"You're as bad as your bum cousin." Beach-Head grumbled. He looked at the last recruit. "Hmmm, you're only known as Longshot. And you're from another dimension. You have hollow bones, granting you great agility, you can shift luck in your favor, and you're also handy with daggers YIE!!!!" Beach Head dodged a dagger. It knocked his clipboard off. 

"Yup." Longshot grinned. He high-fived Beast King.

"Awesome! You were great hey dude what're you looking at?" Jack wondered. Longshot was staring at Ali walking by with a glazed-over look in his eye. Gary Wright's "Dream Weaver" played in his head.

Well, this is going to drive the X-Men nuts if they ever get wind of this! How will the new guys fare? What madness will happen? What'll happen to the captured Joes? What'll happen next? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!    


	7. Training in Insanity!

GI Joe, The Movie: Evo-tized!

To Metal Dragon1: I agree with you about Pyro and Firestorm liking Burner. You think I'm missing some reviews? If that's the case, then please re-post them! BTW, how soon is the new chapter of 'Take the Long Way Home' going to be posted? I just can't wait to read it! 

To Red Witch: Yeah, I can't exactly remember how those training scenes went. So, if I screw this up, sorry! But Beach Head will be driven nuts either way.

To Aaron: Mayday/Paige Adams and Vorona/Daina Janack are both characters from the new GI Joe comics. Hi-Tech is a character from the Spy Troops movie and is a newer action figure. Yep, the new Misfits are Firestar, Spyder, Longshot, and Beast King. I want to bring in Arcade later on. I'm still wary of him. Of course I had to get Longshot and Dazzler together! They hooked up in the comics, didn't they? As for casualties, I have no idea.

To Wizard1: Glad you like the new recruits! I have no idea what 'Vorona' means. I heard that was going to be Daina's new codename. I don't know too much about Shatterstar, so I don't plan to bring him in anytime soon, and there's that confusing thing with him and the patient. That's _part_ of the reason for Kyle's attitude. Yeah, you definitely do _not_ want to be in Cobra's shoes. 

To Sparky Genocide: Well, Dial-Up isn't as annoyed by Jester as she claims. Actually, Hi-Tech, Vorona, and Mayday are not original characters. See my response to Aaron's review. I may bring Spiral in soon. I don't plan to bring Arcade in right now. Well, let's find out how the new guys drive Beach-Head nuts!

Let's get this story over 100 reviews! WHOOOOOO!!!!!!!

It's Profile Time Again! *Crowd hoots, hollers, cheers, and claps* Now we look at a Joe who lives a life of flame, a man who can tackle any raging inferno, Barbecue

Barbecue

Real Name: Gabriel A. Kelly (He is not related to Senator Robert E. Kelly)

Affiliation: Army

Rank: E-4

Primary Military Specialty: Fireman

Secondary Military Specialty: Infantry, Misfit Handler (Pyro)

Birthplace: Boston, Massachusetts

Bio: Barbecue would have been the seventh in a direct line of Kellys to serve the Boston Fire Department. He loves riding fire trucks, and he enjoys the sound of sirens wailing. He also enjoys the fact that as a fireman, he gets to kick doors down and brandish an axe. 

Barbecue is more known for being a party animal. He knows almost every party trick there is, and he knows exactly how to liven up an occasion. Recently, Barbecue joined the small group of Joes that ended up in the care of a teenage mutant. In Los Angeles, Barbecue helped rescue the Australian mutant pyrokinetic St. John Allerdyce, codenamed Pyro. Pyro had been betrayed and left for dead by his fellow Acolytes. Barbecue and Pyro bonded after that, and when Pyro joined the Misfits, Barbecue was named Pyro's handler.

The other Misfits often joke that Barbecue and Pyro are perfect for each other: St. John loves starting fires, and Barbecue enjoys putting them out! 

Chapter 7: Training in Insanity!

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(The GI Joe base training area)

Beach Head stood in front of an obstacle course, with all the standard equipment. With him was the mutant recruits Firestar, Spyder, Longshot, and Beast King.

"Okay, you little maggots." He said. "This obstacle course has some lasers and your standard obstacles. Now I want you to navigate this course as fast as you can." He looked at the recruits. _Now which one of these newbies can I torture first? The pretty boy with the three-fingered hands sounds like a good first victim._ "Longshot, go!" The Mojoworld native only shrugged and walked through the course in a calm manner. The lasers that adorned the course fired at him. Now, at the speed the Mojoworld warrior walked, the lasers would hit him for sure. But thanks to his good luck powers, the lasers never even grazed him! He calmly walked to the other side, then waved with a grin to a bug-eyed Beach Head. 

"Hi!" He grinned. Beach-Head grumbled.

"I hate him. Okay, Surfer Bum, you try!" He said to Jack. 

"Dude, you seriously need to take a chill!" Jack grinned. He looked at the obstacle course. "Dude." He turned into a mole and dug into the ground. He tunneled under the obstacle course. He re-emerged on the other side, turned back into human form, then waved with a grin. "Hey Beach Ball! I did it!" Beach Head's eyes bugged out again.

"Oh come on!" He moaned. "Alright!" He sighed. "Firestar, Spyder, let's see you get through this." The twosome shrugged. Firestar took to the air and flew over the course, Spyder following. Firestar used heat beams to melt the laser cannons, and any she missed fell under Spyder's electro-webs. Beach Head grumbled. 

"I hate working with mutant kids." Beach Head growled. 

"I'm gonna go talk to that Farrah-haired girl." Longshot grinned as he walked off. 

"I'm gonna go surf." Beast King laughed.

"In the _mountains?!_" Spyder asked in disbelief.

"Mountain surfing?" Jack thought about it for a second. "AWESOME!!!!!" He ran off, morphing into a cheetah. Firestar decided to follow him in the air. Spyder scuttled after them. Beach Head noticed the adult recruits, Hi-Tech, Vorona, Burner, and Mayday walking up to him. 

"Maybe we can finally get some _sane_ training done around here." Beach Head grumbled.

"Remember the plan, guys." Hi-Tech whispered to the other three Joes, who nodded with a snicker. 

"Go!" Beach Head called. What the four Joes did next caused Beach Head to jump up and down and scream out every curse word known to man. Hi-Tech ran first, using the weird powers he obtained as a child. His eyes glowed electronic green, as did the lasers. He mentally commanded them to shut down. As soon as Hi-Tech took off, the others followed. Mayday used her mutant sight to keep everyone appraised, and Vorona and Burner used their sniper rifle and flamethrower to take care of the obstacles. "**_OF ALL THE MOTHER$%#@^* @$^@&#!#!$#*$@@%^#*#*#@^!^#$*$#^@&#%@!&#@^*!&##@&$^@*#&@^#*@$&^@*$^@(*#^*@^#*^#*@^#&@!#^%#*!&#*&!@%!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAGH!!!!!!!!!!!"_** The four Joes laughed their heads off as they walked away.

"See you around, Pickle Head!" Hi-Tech called.

"**_AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!_**" 

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(The Stockade)

"Kyle, _please_ don't screw this up! We need you to guard the perimeter!" Blob snapped. He and Duke were talking to Kyle in the perimeter guard room.

"Okay, okay sheesh!" Kyle grumbled. With a smile, he leaned back on his swivel chair and put his yellow boot-covered feet on the console. "Just keep that jabroni Lina away from me. She's as dependable as an alcoholic at a wine-taster's convention." 

"Why you--?" Fred made a motion to knock Kyle's teeth out, but Duke held him back. 

"Easy, Fred. He's just doing it to tick you off." Duke said. Fred calmed down. 

"And she also is as useful in a bar brawl as a wet noodle. Sorry. I take that back. A wet noodle **_is_ **useful in a fight compared to her." Kyle added with a laugh. 

"YOU'RE DEAD!!!" Fred tried to bash Kyle's skull in again. However, he was stopped by the sound of giggling. Falcon walked in, a pretty blonde lady with him, clad in a pink dress. 

"Hey Fred, that chick sounds like _she_ could kick some butt, compared to _your_ girlfriend." Kyle smirked, pointing at the blonde. "The Thunderbolt prefers hot kick-butt chicks, not deformed cowards."  

"Why you little-?!" Blob made a motion to strangle Kyle, but Kyle's smaller size made him faster and more agile than the Blob, allowing him to easily dodge the Blob and run away. He ran around the room laughing, an angry Fred hot on his heels. 

"Who is this?!" Duke snapped at Falcon, pointing at the blonde. 

"My girlfriend Heather." Falcon replied.

"You goofball! You know civilians are not allowed on the base without advance notification and authorization! It's for security reasons!" Unbeknownst to the three, Fred, or Kyle, the console computer activated, and data briefly flashed on it for a moment. 

"I thought it was authorized!" Falcon explained. 

"Uh-huh." Duke nodded, crossing his arms. He noticed the camera around Heather's neck. "Excuse me, ma'am." He gently took the camera off her, popped open the back, and pulled the film out. 

"Hey!" She exclaimed. In the background, Kyle's laughing and Fred's snarling and yelling could be heard. 

"Sorry." Duke apologized. "Standard procedure, ma'am." He handed the camera back. "Falcon, get her out of here!" Falcon sighed. "Scratch that, I will! Falcon, take over for Thunderbolt. It's obvious he's not going to do his job!" Duke walked away with Heather. Falcon walked to the two mutants. 

"Fred, Kyle, you two help the others guard Serpentor. I got this." Falcon grinned. The two shrugged and went inside. Falcon sat at his post, until he noticed Mayday walk by, still laughing after the incident at training that drove Beach Head crazy. Falcon grinned.

"Hey Mayday!" He ran off, abandoning his post. In the stockade, the gang met up. They all shot looks at Kyle.

"Look Kyle, we know you don't like Dragonfly. But she's gonna be here in case something happens and someone ends up hurt." Alpine warned. 

"Everyone watch him." Sunfire whispered to the other mutants. "I fear for Dragonfly for some reason." 

_So do I, Sunfire. So do I_. Fred gulped.

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(The swamps)

Heather walked out of the swamps, triumphant smirk on her face. She threw off her hat and wig, revealing herself to be Zarana. 

"I can't believe that bloody worked!" She laughed. "It worked like a charm, Virus." She looked around. "Virus? _Virus?_ Where are you?" Her question was answered when she heard insane laughing. As well as see a rock floating in the air, scrawling the words "Althea loves Virus 4ever" over and over on the tree. "_VIRUS!!!_" Virus made himself visible, using a light refracting device he built hidden in his belt. "Did you get the information?" 

"Yeah, I did. I got everything. The layouts, and info on defenses!" Virus cackled. "I hope Pythona keeps her promise. I want Althea alive. She can mutate Toad into a gecko for all I care. I built a machine that'll free Althea from the spell she's under! Then we can be happy again!" He turned his head around rapidly over and over. "Hear that? She's calling me! I can hear her in my mind! She needs help! Toad's going to make my sweet water angel bear his monstrous offspring!" 

"Ho brother." Zarana grumbled. "You're an insane idiot, you know that?"

Uh oh! I think the Joes are in trouble! What is causing Sunfire and Blob's fear for Dragonfly? Will Cobra get the BET? What do they plan to do with it? Will Falcon ever stop goofing off? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!  

  


	8. Abandonment of Duty!

GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!

To Red Witch: Glad you liked the Beach Head torture! Yeah, Falcon screws up. But he's not the only one…

To Sparky Genocide: Kamakura? Well, I may introduce him down the line. I'm being true to the movie, so Falcon is going to the Slaughterhouse, but he won't be alone…

To Wizard1: When's the next chapter of "Karaoke Dance Party" coming up? I want to read it! 

To Metal Dragon1: Oh, okay. As for the Firestorm bio, next chapter! I think I did one already…

Hey, I want to get over 100 reviews for this story! So if you read, please review!

It's Profile Time again! *Crowd hoots, hollers, cheers, claps, and chants* Well, now we look at a Joe who's more spaced out than an alien, Footloose!

Footloose

Real Name: Andrew D. Meyers

Affiliation: Army

Rank: E-4

Primary Military Specialty: Infantry

Secondary Military Specialty: Special Services (Basketball coach)

Birthplace: Gary, Indiana

Bio: Born and raised in Gary, Footloose had a great start in life. He was an A student, an Eagle Scout, valedictorian of his high school class, and captain of his track team. However, while studying for a degree in Phys Ed, he suddenly dropped out. He claimed his reason was to find himself. He moved to the coast and became weird for three years. In Venice Beach, he got inspired to get some meaning into his life and joined the Army. He took Basic and AIT training at Fort Benning. He also graduated jump and desert training schools. 

After serving in GI Joe, he was sent to work with a team of Joes who were situated in a base in Malibu, California. That base has also become the headquarters to the West Coast Misfits.

Note: Footloose tends to talk like a hippie, amusing the West Coast Misfits to no end, and driving some of the other Malibu Joes crazy. 

Chapter 8: Abandonment of Duty!

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(Joe Stockade)

"AAAAAAAGHH!!!!!" Serpentor III screamed in his cell. He ran around, trying to put out his flaming body. Pyro peeked inside, laughing madly. He was joining the other Misfits there.

"Take that, evil Dryer Fairy King! WHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!" Pyro cackled madly at the flaming Cobra Emperor.

"At least _he's_ having fun today." Toshiro grumbled. Alpine nodded in agreement. 

"Well, he was given carte blanche by Duke." The mountain climber chuckled. He then looked over at Toshiro. "I heard you've been thinking about leaving the team." 

"Yes." Toshi sighed. "I've always been a solo guy. I still don't feel…comfortable on a team. I really have no real friends besides John Proudstar. And he's a bit of a loner himself." Alpine smiled.

"I see your problem. You're too guarded. You need to open up to others, Toshi." Alpine grinned. "The other kids will miss you if you leave. And so will Ace. Why not hang out with Bazooka? He'll be your friend if you give him gum." Toshi looked at the jersey-and-helmet-wearing Joe. Bazooka was watching Teletubbies, and laughing. 

"That moron?" Toshi said in disbelief. Alpine shook his head.

"You're too judgemental. That's another thing you need to work on." Alpine walked away to stop Pyro from setting fire to everything else in the stockade. Blob and Dragonfly were conversing. Thunderbird was fidgeting nervously, waiting for a good fight to roll around. Wanda was beating up Pietro, and Terrell was eating a sandwich. 

"Hey jabronis!" Kyle called as he walked in. He shot a look at Dragonfly. "And chickens." Fred glared. Kyle sneered back. "The Thunderbolt says, how's our prisoner?" 

_Kyle **has** been acting more aggressive and vicious lately!_ John Proudstar realized. _Something seriously wrong is going on here. Kyle's normally rather loudmouthed and confrontational, but he never was like **this!**_

_Oh no. I think Kyle may be having the same problem Jake did!_ Wanda gulped. _Oh great! I remember when Draconis first emerged. He was practically invincible! The more we fought him, the stronger and stronger he became! If Kyle's becoming dominated by **his** dark side, then we're in big trouble! If one Wildfire is powerful, then two Wildfires are unstoppable!_

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(Outside the stockade)

"Mayday! Mayday!" Falcon ran up to the laughing sniper. "Hey! Wait up!"

"Huh? What's up, Falcon?" Mayday/Paige Adams asked. Falcon smoothed his dark hair.

"Well, I was wondering if maybe…well…you might like to go for a meal with me sometime." Falcon asked, trying to be at his most charming. Mayday put her hands on her hips. 

"Falcon, don't you have a job to do? Knowing Cobra, they'll strike back hard if they want to get Serpentor back." Mayday said.

"Oh relax, Mayday!" Falcon grinned. "They won't attack! I mean, Cobra can't get in! Several members of the East and West Coast Misfit teams are guarding the Snake King. And my post is just watching a TV screen. They don't _really_ need me. They can go without me for a half hour." Mayday walked away.

"Go do your job, Falcon!" She scolded. 

"Hey wait! Mayday!" Falcon chased after the sniper. Meanwhile, inside the stockade, a Misfit was growing very bored. 

_God, the Thunderbolt is bored._ Kyle grumbled. All day, he was irritable, and for some odd reason, he lashed out at the new medic Dragonfly. He noticed Lina walk away.

"I'll be at the medlab if anyone needs me." Lina "Dragonfly" Chakram walked out of the stockade and towards the medlab. Kyle sneered.

_The Thunderbolt thinks he and this little cowardly freak need to "talk"…_Kyle walked off.

"Where are you going, Thunderbolt?" Blob asked suspiciously. Kyle shrugged.

"The Thunderbolt's going to the training area. He needs to get rid of some excess volts." Kyle replied nonchalantly as he walked off. It was known that sometimes, Kyle became irritable when his body held too much electricity. Blob looked over at the West Coast Misfits on the team for approval. 

"Let him go." Velocity said. "After he throws some lightning bolts at some of those flying target thingies, he feels a lot better." 

"Besides, if Kyle's body holds too much electricity, every time he gets touched, the person touching him ends up with the mother of all static shocks!" Thunderbird chuckled. "It happened to Hardcase three times!" 

"Thanks!" Kyle ran off with a grin. He did go to the training area, but immediately left after throwing a couple bolts of lightning at a punching bag. _Well, now that fat moron thinks the Thunderbolt's taking care of some personal problems, The Thunderbolt and that dopey Dragonfly can have our little "talk"…_ Outside the stockade, Mayday was avoiding Falcon.

"Falcon, Duke's going to be **_steamed_** if you don't go back to your post and doing your job!" Mayday snapped. 

"I'm telling you, they don't need me!" Falcon groaned. "The guys can take care of anything!" 

"Falcon, quit goofing off and…" Mayday started to warn until the Joes heard a KABOOM!!!!! "Oh no!" 

Oh no is right! What was that explosion? Was it Cobra, or something else? Can the Joes deal with it? What'll happen next? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!


	9. Dark Times!

GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!

To Red Witch: Please review Chapter 8! Loved the new chapters to "Firestar's Day Off"!

To Sparky Genocide: Yeah, those do sound like interesting ideas! Alright! I'll see what I can do!

To RogueFanKC: Yeah, Kyle plans to jump Dragonfly. 

To MetalDragon1: Please review Chapter 7! BTW, what do you have planned next for "Take the Long Way Home"? I can't wait for you to put up a new chapter!

To Wizard1: Please review Chapter 7! Yup, **two** guys are going to hit the Slaughterhouse. BTW, when's the next chapter of "Karaoke Dance Party" coming up? 

It's Profile Time again! *Crowd hoots, cheers, hollers, claps, and chants* Okay, we got a special Profile Time for you. We'll take another look at a Malibu Joe who many consider insane, as per Metal Dragon1's request, the demolitions expert, Firestorm! 

Firestorm

Real Name: Charles Burns

Affiliation: Marines

Rank: Sergeant

Eyes: Green

Hair: Red (In the beginnings of a mullet)

Primary Military Specialty: Explosives Ordinance Disposal (EOD)

Secondary Military Specialty: Demolitions

Birthplace: St. Helens, Montana

Bio: Born at the foot of a volcano, Firestorm seemed to have an almost obsessive love for all things that exploded, set on fire, or went very, very fast. Firestorm's temper, as fiery as his hair, has often gotten him in trouble a lot as a kid.  

At the age of 16, Firestorm got his driver's license. He constantly fixed up his car for more speed, and he thought of speed limits as evil. He racked up a world's record for speed violations, a record that still stands to this day!

His dream was to live a life where he could blow things up, set fires, and go fast. A job at a fireworks factory was nice, but it wore thin. Inspired by a commercial, Firestorm signed up for the Marines. In the Marines, Firestorm became the world's premier expert on anything that blew up. Explosives were a source of spiritual cleansing for Firestorm. 

On a mission in the jungle, Firestorm met and befriended a Macaque monkey who ended up being known as Blast Radius, or BR for short. BR, proving to be very smart, ended up becoming inseparable from Firestorm, and his partner in operations. 

In GI Joe, Firestorm fit right into the regular insanity. He often took live bombs back to the base to detonate later, preferably near anywhere belonging to Malibu Joe 3rd-in-command Hardcase. He quickly found a friend in the East Coast Misfit St. John Allerdyce, codenamed Pyro, who enjoyed setting fires just as much as Firestorm.

**A/N: The end to this chapter gets pretty heavy, so I'd just like to warn you. Thank you.**

Chapter 9: Dark Times!

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(The GI Joe base)

_Oh please don't let Cobra attack the stockade, oh please don't let Cobra attack the stockade! I'll get into **really** big trouble!_ Falcon moaned as he and Mayday ran to the explosion's source. However, what he saw filled him with relief: in the Joe motor pool, a jeep had been blown up. Standing near its flaming smoking wreckage was a giggling Firestorm. BR was doing a tribal dance around the flames. 

"I BLEWWWW IT UP!!!! BLOWED UP _REEEEEEAL GOOOOOOOOD!!!!!!!_ WHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Firestorm cackled madly. Falcon sighed in relief. 

"Oh, it's only Firestorm blowing something up." 

"Hey! That's _my_ Jeep! AAAAGH!!!!!!" Beach Head screamed. 

"Oops." Firestorm scratched his head. A jeep behind him exploded.

"OH GOD!!!! NOT MY JEEP!!! AAAAAGH!!!!!" Hardcase screamed. 

"Aw well." Firestorm shrugged. Mayday groaned.

"Oh brother." She glared at Falcon. "Now Falcon, get back to your post!" She grumbled as she walked off. 

"Mayday!" Falcon whined.

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(Inside the Joe Stockade)

The assembled Misfits, as well as Gung-Ho, Alpine, and Bazooka, were just hanging about. Serpentor was sulking in his cell. 

"You humans will release me, or Cobra shall wreak terrible vengeance on you!" Serpentor III snarled. 

"I doubt it." Sunfire smirked. "Cobra has never faced a son of the islands!" 

"Regardless of where you come from, you will be destroyed."

"You're all talk!" Pietro laughed arrogantly. 

"And so is Cobra!" Blob laughed. 

"Cobra has never faced a mighty warrior of the Apache, Serpentor." Thunderbird glared. "And my people _never_ quit." Serpentor smirked.

"If I know my troops, they will come for me. I inspired great respect between us. I would aid my troops in battle, and they would aid me." Suddenly…

**_KABOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!_**

"_WHAT?!_" Gung-Ho roared. Pythona walked into the stockade. Accompanying her were the Dreadnoks and Nemesis Enforcer. Thunderbird snarled, unsheathing his hatchet. The Misfits powered up.

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(The Joe Med-Lab) 

Lina Chakram, the mew medic codenamed Dragonfly, was straightening up. Lifeline was with Flint and Iceberg out looking for Roadblock's unit, and Bree and Stretcher were busy taking care of some business with the new recruits. Lina heard the explosion.

"Oh no!" She made a move to run out, but… "_AAAAAAAGH!!!!!_" A blast of lightning knocked her back against the wall hard.

"Oh no…" A silhouette said in a familiar Boston accent. His hands and eyes were crackling with golden electricity. "You are not going anywhere. You and I have to settle some business first." Kyle Wildfire snarled. His hair turned black, and the electricity around his eyes and hands turned blue. "You are not a Misfit. You don't deserve to be a Misfit. I guess you'll have to learn that the hard way."

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(Joe Stockade)

"Thunderbird, no!" Velocity snapped. With a war cry, the Apache mutant charged Nemesis Enforcer. The winged warrior hit the warrior hard. 

"Ugh!" Thunderbird landed hard on the ground.

"Impetous fool!" Virus laughed, marching in. He was in some kind of Exo-suit. 

"Free Serpentor!" Pythona screamed. The Dreadnoks charged, packing Virus-modified versions of their trademark weapons: A flamethrower bazooka (Torch), a missile-launching backpack (Monkeywrench), a wrist-mounted chainsaw (Buzzer), an electrically charged wrist-mounted blade (Ripper), Twin laser cannons (Zarana and Zandar), A buzzsaw (Zartan), a laser whip (Gnawgahyde), energy-charged gauntlets (Leathersuit), and a laser sword (Zanya).

"YO JOE!!!" The Joes replied. Alpine, Bazooka, and Gung-Ho fired their weapons, while the assembled Misfits used their powers.

"Eat hexbolt!" Wanda shorted out a drill arm of Virus's with her hex powers. 

"We got 'im!" Pyro and Sunfire powered up. 

"Ha!" Virus blasted the fiery mutants with foam that held them in place. 

"AAAGH!!!" A laser grazed Pyro's arm. 

"Time to feel some PAAAAAAAINNNNNNN!!!!!!" Leathersuit grinned. Pietro and Terrell charged him. Leathersuit backhanded them both. He then grabbed Pietro and smashed his leg hard. 

"AAAAAGHH!!! Not again!" Pietro howled as he heard and felt his leg break. Leathersuit punched out Terrell. Gung-Ho raced to the cable that went to the alarms, but he was blasted by Virus, hitting his leg.

"AAAAAGH!!!" The Marine screamed. As the sounds of battle went on, the Cajun Marine crawled to the cable. 

"Oof!!" The Blob was knocked back by Monkeywrench's missiles.

"C'mon…c'mon…Got it!" Gung-Ho, using Proudstar's hatchet, spliced the cable! The alarms sounded.

"Let's go!" Virus fired a beam at the cell Serpentor was in. He held a weird orb. It looked _organic_, nothing Virus would ever work with. 

"Hey Snakey! Catch!" Virus threw the orb. The Dreadnoks noticed a lot of Joes, including the New Recruits, and the other Misfits racing towards them. "Let's go!" Serpentor was engulfed by the pod, and it flew away. "So long, you stupid Joes!"

"_VIRUS!!!_" Toad leapt up and tried to kick Virus down, but the Dreadnok fired more of his foam, engulfing the toad-like teen. 

"Toddles!" Al raced to Todd's aid. Virus sneered. 

"Happy suffocating, Toad."

"So long, humans!" Pythona laughed. She, Nemesis Enforcer, and the Dreadnoks teleported away. Hawk looked over at the damage.

"Oh my God!" Bree and Stretcher raced to help the injured Joes and Misfits. Alpine, Thunderbird and Bazooka were banged up and beaten badly by Nemesis Enforcer, Gung-Ho and Pyro were shot (although the Australian mutant's wound wasn't as severe), Pietro's leg was broken, and Wanda was recovering from Pythona's attack. Velocity and Blob were the only ones uninjured. Velocity made it through luck, and Blob was practically invincible.

"Aw great! Just great!" Hawk grumbled. "Joes and Misfits injured, and Serpentor's free!" He growled in rage. "Where was Falcon?!" Just then, he dropped all thoughts of Falcon when the group heard a bloodcurdling scream, and a clap that sounded like it came from the mother of all lightning bolts.

"**_AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!_**" 

"Lina! She's in trouble!" Angelica screamed. She and Lina were best friends.

"**_NO!_**" Blob yelled as he ran to the med lab. Suddenly, something flew in the air, and landed in front of the Joes. It was Lina. She looked like she was struck by lightning several times over. 

"Oh my God!" Blob and Firestar raced to grab Lina, but static electricity knocked them back.

"Thunderbolt…" Blob snarled. "**_KYLE!!! SHOW YOUR FACE NOW, YOU COWARD!!!!_**"

"I got her!" Bree ran to Lina. "AAAH!!!!" A lighting blast knocked her back.

"**_STAY BACK!!!!! I'M BUSY TAKING OUT SOME TRASH!!!!!!_**" Kyle snarled. He flew over the wounded Dragonfly. "**_SHE DOES NOT DESERVE TO BE HERE!!!! SHE IS A COWARD!!!!! I WILL SHOCK SOME COURAGE INTO THIS WINGED WENCH!!!_**" Kyle blasted everyone back with a shock intended to knock them back. "**_IF ANYONE INTERFERES, I'LL PUMP YOU FULL OF THUNDER TOO!!!! DRAGONFLY ASKED FOR THIS!!!!!_**" 

Oh my God! Kyle Wildfire's gone crazy! Can anyone save Lina?  Can Thunderbolt be stopped? What is causing him to act like this? What is Cobra up to next? Will they get the BET? What'll the Joes do? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!


	10. Aftermath!

GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized! 

To Metal Dragon1: Read the new Chapter of "Take the Long Way Home". Loved it! It was hilarious! Yeah, I am surprised Beach head has no heart problems. Is it possible for Virus to have multiple brain aneurysms and _still_ be a genius? I dunno, maybe. I think it's possible in Virus's case. After all, he's already schizophrenic. What do you have planned for us in the next chapter, and when does Kid Razor appear again? Glad you liked the new Firestorm Bio! And yes, the Wildfire Brothers will have a "Chat"…

To Red Witch: Lina's spray may be useful as an electrical insulator. I don't know. Well, Lina's in the infirmary now, and let's just say Kyle should avoid Fred for a while!

To Wizard1: When'll the next chapter of "Karaoke Dance Party' be up? PLEASE PUT IT UP!!!!

It's Profile Time Again! *Crowd hoots, hollers, cheers, screams, and claps* This time we look at the field commander of the GI Joe team, Duke!

Duke

GI Joe First Sergeant

Real Name: Conrad S. Hauser

Affiliation: Army

Rank: E-8 (Master Sergeant)

Primary Military Specialty: Airborne Infantryman

Secondary Military Specialty: Artillery, Small-Arms Armorer

Birthplace: St. Louis, Missouri

Bio: When Duke first joined the Army, he was fluent in English, French, and German! In the Army, he would gain a background in Chinese and Southeast Asian dialects, and he studied at Airborne School and the U.S. Army Special Language School. He would use his knowledge of language to work with the South Vietnamese. Upon returning home, Duke became an instructor, teaching in _four_ Special Forces schools! 

Before joining GI Joe, Duke befriended future teammate Flint. When Duke joined GI Joe, he would end up recommending Flint to the team.

After joining GI Joe, Duke vowed to "make the sorry lot of you into soldiers"! He would be known for being tough on the Joes, but he earned their respect. When Hawk became the GI Joe team commander, Duke became field commander.

Lines of = is a flashback.

BTW, I'm in a bit of a bind about something. I'm trying to decide if I should include this in my regular Misfitverse canon or not. Any ideas on that would be very helpful.

Chapter 10: Aftermath!

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(GI Joe Base Office)

"_&%$#!!!!!_" Hawk punched the wall angrily. With him was Duke, Siryn, and Wavedancer. "Great! Just great! Serpentor is free, and Thunderbolt goes nuts! Siryn, he was under your command!"

"Not to mention Dragonfly is one of the East Coast Team!" Althea grumbled. Siryn sighed and shook her head.

"I have no idea why Thunderbolt attacked Dragonfly so heinously. I know he never thought too highly of Dragonfly, but I cannae understand his actions."

"He tried to shock us to death, too!" Althea said.

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(A half-hour earlier) 

"**_HA!!!!!!!!_**" Kyle "Thunderbolt" Wildfire appeared to have gone mad. He pitched lightning everywhere, at all the Joes and his fellow Misfits. Ali and Velocity tried to rescue the beaten Dragonfly, but a snarling Thunderbolt blasted them with lightning.

"**_WHY WON'T YOU LISTEN TO ME?!?!_**" Kyle screamed in frustration. "**_I'M TRYING TO KEEP THIS TEAM IN FIGHTING SHAPE!!!!! WE DON'T NEED DRAGONFLY!!! SHE IS WEAK!!!! SHE IS USELESS!!! SHE SHOULDN'T BE HERE!!! SHE HAS NO RIGHT TO CALL HERSELF A MISFIT!!!_**" A snarling Red Dragon stood before his younger brother, in his Dragon Mode. Jake lunged, blasting flames. Kyle easily dodged, but Jake locked in a sleeper hold. Kyle tried to shock Jake off, but his body just kept growing stronger and stronger under the electrical assault. The electrical field around Kyle started to weaken as he fell under the hold. Finally, Kyle fell asleep, and the field disappeared. Jake laid him on the ground, then changed back to human form. 

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(A Lounge on the GI Joe base) 

The other Misfits of both coasts were hanging around. In the next room could be heard some very loud shouting. It was the Wildfire Brothers arguing. Blob punched the opposite wall angrily.

"He should be lucky that he's only facing his brother, instead of me." Blob growled. He heard the sounds of the brothers' yelling increase. 

"_Kyle, she is not a weakling! I hope she takes **your** head off with those wings!_" Jake snapped.

"_She couldn't take off an** ant's **head with those wings!!!_" Kyle yelled back. That was one of the tamer segments of their argument. 

"Why do I get the feeling they'll end up trying to kill each other in there?" Paul sighed.

"I do not understand Kyle's problem with Lina." Xi scratched his head.

"None of us do." Xi said. 

"He thinks Lina's weak because she's a pacifist." A Joe known as Leatherneck said as he walked in.

"You've gotten on Lifeline about his pacifism all the time, Leatherneck!" Craig exclaimed.

"Yeah, but I don't think Lifeline's a coward." Leatherneck shrugged. "He's run into battlefields without weapons. That takes guts. A lot of 'em."

"I hope they kick Kyle out." Wanda smirked. "He deserves it for what he did." 

"He'd make a great Acolyte right now." Blob grumbled.

"Yeah, what he did to Lina? Sounds like something Magneto would do. I should know." Lance shuddered as he remembered the barbed wire.

"Look, Kyle's still one of us, you know." Terrell said.

"Let's see, first he neglected his job, which put my brother, Pyro, and Thunderbird in the infirmary, and then he brutally attacks a medic for _no reason_, putting her in the infirmary!" Wanda snapped.

"Hey, you think I don't care about that?" Terrell snapped. "Thunderbird's my friend, Wanda!"

"I think you're being a little to lenient on Kyle!" Wanda snapped back. "You know what he did!" 

"I saw it, yo! I nearly got fried too!" Terrell yelled. 

"Hey c'mon!" Ace said loudly. "Fighting isn't going to help. Let's just let Jake and Kyle settle this. Al and Theresa are talking with Hawk and Duke as to what to do next." 

"I feel sorry for Falcon." Lila gulped. "He abandoned his post. They'll throw the book at him! Then pick it up, and slap him in the face very hard numerous times with it!" 

"Well, that just brightens our day, Lila. Thanks." Ali said sarcastically, rolling her eyes.

"I feel sorry for Lina." Paul said. "First, her parents disown her for her mutation, then Kyle nearly kills her. I bet she feels terrible."

"She's unconscious." Craig said simply. "Blob and I checked on her. Stretcher said it was a miracle that she was only burned. With the amount of volts she took, Kyle could've permanently damaged her nervous system." 

"I mean, who does Kyle think he is?" Blob growled. "Just because she doesn't like to fight, it doesn't mean she's a coward. And it doesn't give Kyle any right to treat her like she's a punching bag!" Pietro opened his mouth, but Wanda hit him with a golf club before he could say anything. "And he goes on about _my past?!_" 

"Something is wrong with Kyle." Craig said. Everyone looked at him. "I got this odd feeling. I'm no telepath, but I can tell something is wrong with Kyle. Something seriously wrong."

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(Cobra La)

Cobra La was an almost alien landscape, hidden underneath the mountains of the Himalayas. **(A/N: I haven't seen the movie in a long time, so I don't quite exactly remember what Cobra La looked like. If I got it wrong, sorry)** The sky was pink with streaks in red. The trees were odd and purple, rather like purple bulbs on big brown stalks. Amidst a horde of celebrating Cobras, the flying pod containing Serpentor III landed on a cliff. The snake-like tyrant emerged from the pod.

"My troops! I have returned!" He said triumphantly. 

"Ahh, my ultimate warrior." A figure revealed himself. From the waist up, he looked like a normal human. He was bald, had a red seashell-shaped eyepatch over his left eye connected to a headband, and was clad in a green outfit that left his right arm and shoulder bare. However, the lower half of his body appeared to be a red sphere. Upon closer examination, the red came from small crabs. 

"My God!" Virus retched in disgust. Cobra La kind of freaked him out. He never was a fan of organic tech, he felt more comfortable surrounded by computers and machines thanks to his genetic mutation. "What are _you?_"

"I am Golobulus, Supreme Ruler of Cobra La."

"I'd like to know what this Cobra La place is about!" Zanya said. The Dreadnoks looked rather sick at the sight of Golobulus. The arrogant and mentally ill Virus glared at Golobulus.

"Golobulus, huh? Well, I find you sickening!" Virus snapped. Golobulus laughed arrogantly at the mutant hacker.

"Ahh, my people are advanced. Very advanced. Instead of depending on cold machines like you, we breed and use the power of DNA to aid in our daily lives."

"Your _people?_" Baroness and Destro said in shock. Golobulus only smirked at the two and turned to Serpentor.

"Ahh, I see my telepathic message to you worked, Dr. Mindbender." Golobulus laughed.

"What?!" Mindbender blinked. "But, _I_ created Serpentor! All three! The idea was mine!" 

"I was the one who sent you the knowledge needed to do it to you in the first place!" He laughed. 

Well, there's a twist for ya! What'll happen next? What'll happen to Kyle? Will Falcon get punished for his role in Serpentor's regaining freedom? Will Cobra still go after the BET? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!     ****


	11. Trial!

GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!

To Wizard1: PLEASE PUT UP THE NEXT CHAPTER OF "KARAOKE DANCE PARTY"!!!!

To Descendent: Thanks a lot! I read the chapter, and it helped out a great deal. Here's some for you!

To Metal Dragon1: Yeah, something _is_ up with the youngest Wildfire. And whatever it is, it's targeted Lina. Yeah, I think I should keep it canon. I like your recommendations. BTW, when's the next chapter of "Take the Long Way Home" coming up? I want to see Kid Razor appear again! Is he going to face off against Catseye?

To Sparky Genocide: Yep, Golobulus is here! Well, keep in mind, Virus's mental illness is slowly causing him to lose his grip on reality.

To Red Witch: Who says _Kyle_ is the one behind all of this? *evil smirk*. Oh yeah, read the new chapter of "Firestar's Day Off"! Love it, but I am kind of hurt you never mentioned me. I know I don't review your stuff much, but college is a pain and it eats time like Garfield near lasagna!

To Aaron: Well Aaron, I've left some clues that something bigger is going on with Kyle Wildfire. I'll leave it to you to figure out the rest.

To RogueFanKC: That's some punishment. Well, I don't know if Lina will play a part in helping Kyle. I really don't.

It's Profile Time again! *Crowd hoots, hollers, cheers, and claps* Now we a look at a Joe who is infamous for his tenacity, the Joe hovercraft driver, Cutter!

Cutter

Real Name: Ronald "Skip" A. Stone

Rank: Lieutenant (Junior Grade)

Affiliation: Coast Guard

Primary Military Specialty: Hovercraft Captain, Aquatic Vehicle Driver

Secondary Military Specialty: Special Services (In Annapolis, he coached the women's swimming team)

Birthplace: Kinsley, Kansas

Bio: Even though his hometown is exactly 1,561 miles away from both San Francisco and New York City, Cutter has dreamed of a life at sea, thanks to a fishing trip he went to in Florida at the age of 14. 

Infamous for his tenacity, Cutter wrote letters to his congressman endlessly for two years in hopes of getting to Annapolis. Eventually, he gave up, realizing the congressman would never respond because his family lacked the power and the money to make any real influence. He ended up enrolling in the Coast Guard Academy.

In the Coast Guard, Cutter became the best at cracking down on high seas drug smugglers.

He originally didn't desire to join GI Joe, until he learned the Joes had no Coast Guardsmen among them. Offended by this, Cutter drove the Coast Guard's top brass so crazy about it, they had to pull a lot of strings and get Cutter recruited so he would just shut up about it! 

Cutter's tenacity, iron will, contrary nature, and weird sense of humor, often considered to be sometimes annoying by his teammates, are assets on the battlefield. When on a mission, Cutter will never give up until it's accomplished, no matter what.

Note: Oddly enough, even though he is a proud Kansas boy, Cutter is often seen wearing a Boston Red Sox baseball cap! 

Chapter 11: Trial!

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(GI Joe base)

At a courthouse, Hawk, General Flagg, Admiral Ledger, and Wild Bill sat behind a judge's podium. Standing before them were Falcon and Thunderbolt.

"Lieutenant Vincent R. Falcone, codename Falcon. Kyle J. Wildfire, codename Thunderbolt. You two have been charged with the following: Falcon, you have been charged with disobeying direct orders. Thunderbolt, you have been charged with assault of a teammate, resulting in the severe wounding and near-death of East Coast Misfit Angelina "Lina" Chakram, codename Dragonfly. You have a previous short history of verbal abuse towards Dragonfly. Do either of you have anything to say before we pass sentence on both of you?" 

"I had no idea Cobra was going to attack! I though it'd be okay to leave for a half-hour!" Falcon exclaimed. Thunderbolt glared at Hawk. 

"The Thunderbolt's got something to say alright. He believes Dragonfly is only a liability. Her inability to take action against Cobra forces makes her an easy target. I was only trying to show that. You think Cobra would have let her _live_?"  Kyle snapped. "She uses the medic claim to cover up the fact that she is a coward and hereby unfit to be a part of the Misfit team! Hawk, the other guys all take her side! They won't talk to me! They look at the Thunderbolt as if he's some cold-blooded monster!" 

"Wait." Duke and Red Dragon walked in. 

"Duke. Red Dragon. Do you two have anything to say?" Hawk asked.

"Yeah. We think you shouldn't sentence these guys just yet." Jake said. "Look, Kyle's a good guy. I don't know why he has this problem with Dragonfly right now. But there is one thing I do know. I may not approve of my brother's actions after Cobra's raid, but he's still my brother." Kyle sighed.

"I promised our mother I'd take care of Falcon. And I can't do that if he's not on the team." Duke added. Hawk nodded.

"We'll keep that in mind." Wild Bill nodded.

"We must convene in private." General Flagg said. "We will summon you when we have made our decision." The four walked away. Duke and Falcon split off from Jake and Kyle.

"Look big brother, I don't need your help! I'm not a little kid anymore!" Kyle snapped.

"You _ingrate!_" Jake snapped back. "I'm trying to help you! Kyle, what is going on with you!! You've been in an irritable mood all day, and you nearly killed Dragonfly! What is going on?!"

"Nothing is going on!!! This is unfair!!! _I'm_ getting punished for Lina's cowardice!" Kyle replied. 

"Cowardice?! You should talk!! How'd you ambush Lina? You cornered her in the med-lab, then proceeded to pump a million volts into her!!! She never got a chance to fight back!!" 

"She **_doesn't_** fight back! That's the problem!!"

"Since when is _that_ a big deal?!"

"Dad always said, you never should be afraid to stand up. Never be afraid to fight. The Wildfires do not feel fear, Jake." 

"Lina is not a Wildfire, Kyle. And even Dad gets scared sometimes. Some people don't like to fight. That doesn't make them weak, Kyle." Jake said. "Sometimes, a person is stronger for not fighting. Think about it. Remember when Rahne told you about when Lifeline was forced to face Sabertooth?" Kyle nodded. "Lifeline didn't throw the first punch. He never punched at all. He didn't fight back against Sabertooth. And Lifeline won! He beat him!"   

"With a massage, Jake." 

"Lifeline must've been scared to death. Is that why you hate Lina? Because she's scared? It's scary for her, being in a new place. And having to be around someone who does nothing but give her abuse doesn't help in the least!" Jake said. Rahne walked up to the two brothers.

"Hey Rahne." Kyle said. The Scottish mutant never even shot him a glance. It was like he was never there. 

"Lina's awake. She's a little shaken, but alright." She said simply. The mutant lycanthrope turned around and walked off.

"You know Sinclair, it's considered **rude** to ignore people like that!" Kyle snapped.

"I don't blame her." Jake glared. Falcon peeked out. 

"Uhm Kyle, get in here." He said. Kyle and Jake walked in.

"We have decided. Kyle J. Wildfire, Vincent R. Falcone, you two have shown a lack of discipline in your actions. Therefore, we have decided to send you two to the Slaughterhouse!" Hawk rapped his gavel. "Dismissed!" 

"Aw heck no." Kyle groaned. "Great. Once again, Lina Chakram gets the Thunderbolt in trouble!" The West Coast Misfit Velocity overheard. 

"Man, I wonder how Pyro and the injured guys are gonna react when they hear this?" Velocity grinned.

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(Infirmary)

"St. John Allerdyce! Knock that off! You'll set the whole building ablaze!" Thunderbird snapped. Across from his bed was Pyro's. The wacko Australian had created a life-size fire statue of the new recruit Firestar and he was staring at her with a silly grin on his face. Fiery hearts flew around his head.

"I met an angel of fire, Thunderbird…" John sighed happily. Thunderbird groaned. Pietro chuckled.

"Forget it, Proudstar. Pyro's mind is permanently screwed up. He's always going to be insane, just like Craig is always going to be an angry thug OWCH!!!" He was knocked out by a vase to the face courtesy of Wanda, who was there to check on them. 

"You know Firestar's going to flip if she sees that, Pyro." Wanda said. She saw out a window a laughing Longshot and Ali. "Well, maybe you should ask Longshot for help, Pyro. Oh wait, Longshot's sane. Never mind."

"My fire angel…" Pyro sighed longingly at the fiery effigy of Angelica.

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(Cobra La)

"The trial begins!" Golobulus crowed. "Bring out the prisoners!" A group of Cobra-La guards brought out the captured Joes. Virus chuckled as he walked up to Roadblock.

"Hey Globby! This one handles the Toad! Let _me_ kill him! Please!" He got a malicious glint in his eye. "That monster you keep ruined my life, Yank. Now I'll get my revenge."

"What did he ever do to you? He's never met you before Cobra Island and the Samurai-Tron!" Roadblock snapped.

"Ever since I was born, he's tried to ruin my life!" Virus screamed. Evidently his delusions had begun to warp his memory of his past. "He always laughed at me! And then I met Althea. It was a beautiful spring day. We fell in love. We were so happy. Until Toad came along and stole her away! He used some kind of magic spell, and I swore one day I'd rescue her! She talks to me telepathically! She cries for help in my head!" 

"We got a name for that. It's called paranoid schizophrenia." Lionheart laughed. Virus slapped her. "You bloody brat!" She kicked him hard in the groin, making the Dreadnok howl in pain. Zartan and the other Dreadnoks laughed. They appreciated Virus's tech, but as a person, Virus was a jerk at best.

"Take that, you nerd!" Leathersuit laughed.

"You're insane, Virus!" Lady Jaye snapped.

"Ah, several members of the GI Joe team." Serpentor smirked, walking up to Bulldog. One Cobra La guard had him pinned, and a second had his bulldog Davey Boy in some odd cage. "I see your great strength isn't great enough to get you out of this. As soon as we execute you, I'll use your dog's bones as Christmas decorations."

"You lay a finger on Davey Boy and I will tear your bloody head off!" Bulldog spat. "Let me go, you bloody coward! Face me like a man!" 

"GI Joe, we of Cobra La find you guilty of intrusion upon our world." Golobulus smirked. "You shall be used as test subjects for our spores!" 

"Hey, we didn't get a lawyer!" Jester yelled.

"A lawyer would've made things worse!" Lionheart grumbled.

Well, things have gotten plain weirder! What spores is Golobulus talking about? What'll happen to the captured Joes? Can they be rescued? Can Thunderbolt and Falcon survive the Slaughterhouse? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly! 


	12. Meet the Renegades!

GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!

To Sparky Genocide: Well, Kyle's not exactly nuts. Think the story "Hotter than Hellion". And yep, Ol' Pyro loves Angelica! I got the idea from Red Witch's "Firestar's Day Off." I was thinking of doing a fic where Red Dragon goes back home to Boston for a day. I can imagine Angelica treating Pyro like Wanda treated Todd back when he had a crush on her. BTW, Heeeeeeeeere's Carmella! BTW, I'm confused. You said her name was Carmella, but according to the Unofficial Handbook of the Marvel Universe website, her name's Camilla. What's up with that?

To Red Witch: Well, here's what happens next! Enjoy! Have fun on your vacation! Read the last chapter of "Firestar's Day Off". Love it! Thanks for mentioning me! Come back fast! 

To Wizard1: Yep, Longshot's in love! Well, in the original movie, Falcon abandoned his post to flirt with Jinx, but since Jinx is with Wolverine in the Misfitverse, I needed Falcon to flirt with someone else. I think Virus may be beyond help at this point. Thanks for reviewing! Enjoy this chapter! BTW, when's Chapter 4 of "Karaoke Dance Party" coming up? You said it'd be up after last weekend! You can't blame the East Coast Misfits for not wanting to talk about Draconis or the possibility of Kyle developing his own dark persona. **_He beat the living heck out of them when he first fully emerged!_** And he's still around, even though no one's seen hide nor hair of him lately. I really don't know what to do with him. I also think Jake secretly is hoping that Kyle isn't suffering the same way he did. 

To Metal Dragon1: Enjoy the new chapter! BTW, when us Chapter 23 coming up? I want to read it! What do you have planned next? And I'll try to fit your suggestions in. 

To descendent: Meet Omega here, buddy! Hope I did him well!

It's Profile Time Again! This time, we look at one of the stars of this story, the fantabulous Falcon!

Falcon

Real Name: Vincent R. Falcone

Grade: O-2 (1st Lieutenant)

Affiliation: Army

Primary Military Specialty: Infantry

Secondary Military Specialty: Medic

Birthplace: Fayetteville, North Carolina

Bio: For Falcon, the military is a family tradition. Falcon is a second-generation Green Beret, and his half-brother is GI Joe field commander Duke. He can speak French, Spanish, Swahili, and Arabic.

Before joining GI Joe, Falcon served briefly with the 5th Special Forces Group Airborne "Blue Light" counter-terrorist unit as the commanding officer of the "A" team. (His father served in the 10th)

One of the less disciplined members of GI Joe, Falcon's tendency to goof around has gotten him into trouble several times. Despite this glaring flaw, he is very competent at the job. He often gets into fights with Duke because they think differently on many things. 

For unrevealed reasons, Duke and Falcon's mother made Duke promise to watch over Falcon, and Falcon often expresses his impatience with Duke for watching over him.

Chapter 12: Meet the Renegades!

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(Over the middle of nowhere)

A Joe plane flew over a desert. This desert contained the base of the Renegades, a group of loose cannons under the charge of a Joe drill sergeant codenamed Sergeant Slaughter. Thunderbolt and Falcon were on board, as were Wolfsbane, Avalanche, Cover Girl, and Shipwreck. 

"Hey, how many Cobras does it take to screw in a lightbulb?" Kyle tried to joke. However, no one responded. Falcon tried to start a conversation with Cover Girl and Shipwreck, but no one responded. Avalanche and Wolfsbane avoided Kyle. They didn't talk to him. They also tried to avoid even looking at him if they could. "Lance, Rahne, as anyone told the two of you you're both major jerks?" 

"At least we never tried to kill a teammate." Lance replied. "Now shut up, Thunderbolt!" 

"Aye. Ye're already in deep enough hot water." Rahne added. Kyle sneered. He then smirked. If they only knew…

"Hey c'mon! I said I was sorry!" Falcon exclaimed. "I'm not a psychic, you know!"

"You don't need precognition to do guard duty, Falcon." Cover Girl glared. "And go apologize to Alpine, Gung-Ho, and Bazooka. They got badly hurt thanks to you." 

"We're here." Wild Bill said. Kyle looked out the window. 

"Where?" 

"Renegade HQ." Lance said, opening the door. Kyle and Falcon blinked.

"Shouldn't we be landing?" Falcon wondered.

"And isn't this the middle of nowhere?" Kyle asked. 

"Have a good trip! See you next fall!" Lance grabbed Kyle and threw him out the plane.

"And don't come back until ye get yer attitude fixed!" Rahne called. 

"Your turn, Falcon!" Cover Girl and Shipwreck threw Falcon out! The two fell, screaming. 

"Hang on!" Kyle powered up and grabbed Falcon. They hovered down to the ground and looked up at the plane as it flew away. "You jerks! I hope they throw _you_ out of a plane someday!" Kyle yelled. "Man, Lina should be here." 

"Where are we?" Falcon wondered. "We should stick together, Kyle." Thunderbolt nodded. "OW!!" His and Kyle's bags landed on top of him.

"Yeah, I HEY!!!" Kyle was shoved from behind and fell to the ground. "Oof! Hey!" 

"Well, well, well. Kyle Wildfire. How's it going, old friend?" A voice with a Bronx accent snickered, the word "friend" dripping with sarcasm. Kyle turned over and looked up. His blue eyes widened when he recognized the voice.

"Carmella!" He yelped. He looked at a girl, around sixteen. She looked like a scrapper, with some muscle on her. Her olive skin indicated she had some Italian blood in her. She had long brown hair and a black diddy rag on her head. She was clad in an old black Survivor Series t-shirt with the sleeves ripped off, and a pair of black sunglasses hanging on the collar. She also had on black biker gloves, and black wristbands with the Italian flag on them. She also had on blue jeans held up by a black studded belt, and steel-toed black boots. "Carmella Unuscione. What are you doing here?"

"I'm gonna train your sorry self." She sneered, green eyes gleaming with the hope of breaking the youngest Wildfire. Like Kyle, Carmella came from a wrestling family. Her father was the legendary wrestler Angelo Unuscione, aka Unus the Untouchable. Unus and Kyle's father, Eric "Blazer" Wildfire, feuded in the WWE back in the 70s and 80s. Their legendary rivalry was considered the then-World Wrestling Federation's response to the NWA's legendary Ric Flair/Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat feud. When Blazer and Unus wrestled at Wrestlemania I, the match was considered a classic, and it was said to a precursor to the match between Randy "Macho Man" Savage and Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat at Wrestlemania III two years later. The rivalry passed on to Blazer's sons and Unus's daughter. When the Wildfires lived in New York for a while, Carmella took to bullying Kyle. She never was able to get one over on Jake, though. "How's your brother? Still hiding behind Jake?"  

"Hide _this!!!_" Kyle fired a thunder blast. Carmella smirked. Her body became surrounded by a green energy field. The lightning attack bounced off the field. The field then formed a big hand and swatted Kyle to the ground. "Hey!"

"You're not the only mutant here, Kylie." Carmella laughed. "I can generate a forcefield that gives me superhuman strength and invulnerability." She flexed her bicep.

"Ha ha Hey!" He felt something slap him upside the head. He turned and noticed a boy a little over six feet in height. His long black hair hung loose around his head and slightly covered his green eyes. His ears and eyebrow were pierced. He had a handsome face and a bit devil-may-care in general aura. He was clad in a black trenchcoat with blue highlights that went down to his ankles. He also wore torn blue jeans, combat boots, and a black t-shirt that had "Do I look like a %&$#@% people person' on it. His hands were covered by blue biker gloves. Over the gloves, he had a pair of metal fingerless gauntlets with the Greek letter Omega on them in blue. His black-and-blue trenchcoat had a silver Omega symbol on the right breast and the back. A bone-like tentacle snaked out from under his trenchcoat sleeve before retracting itself. 

"And this is my tag team partner." Carmella smirked. "Michael Nagrite from Miami, codename Omega. He's got those bone tentacles made from calcium. He also has great strength, hollow bones granting him great agility, and a healing factor." Omega nodded.

"Call me Mike. Carm and I like dealing with punks like you. Heard you beat up a medic." 

"She was no medic, she was a stupid jabroni coward, now you'd better back up off the Thunderbolt, or else the Thunderbolt will slap the taste out of your mouth!" Kyle snapped at Mike. Omega laughed.

"I'm trained in bushido, shorty." Mike smirked. "Been doing it for years." 

"Bushido this!" Kyle fired another thunder blast. Omega, with a smirk, flipped to the side, then nailed Kyle with a punch to the face. Kyle staggered back, then Carmella took the electrokinetic down with a Clothesline from Hell. The two high-fived.

"Yipe." Falcon gulped. Carmella and Mike turned to him.

"You want some, Lieutenant?" Carmella dared Falcon. "You can't handle me! I carry the blood of the great Unuscione family of wrestling! You are looking at the woman who will be looking at the first female WWE Champion!" Falcon blinked. 

"Well, uhm…" He gulped. "I'll be rooting for ya, heh heh." 

"Easy Carm." Omega put a hand on her shoulder. Even thouch Mike Nagrite loved to fight as much as Carmella Unuscione, he had a much cooler head than she did. The two were like opposites: Mike was calmer and more disciplined thanks to his bushido training, Carmella was hot-tempered and displayed the personality of a typical bully. "Let Mercer, Red Dog, and Taurus deal with him. Sarge said we handle Kyle Wildfire." Carmella grumbled and cursed in Italian. 

"Well well well, lookit what we got here." A man with brown hair in a flattop in a red uniform shoved Falcon. Falcon noticed the uniform had the red Cobra insignia on a white circle. Over it was the black circle with a line through it like the "No Smoking" symbol. 

"A deserter. We don't like deserters." A Samoan man said. He was clad in tight white football pants, and a red jersey with the sleeves ripped off. He carried a staff with two sacks of sand attached to the end.

"We also have a problem with those who beat up medics." Mike looked at a fallen Thunderbolt. Falcon found his nose dangerously close to a scimitar. The holder was a bald Eastern European man with a black moustache and beard. 

"Mercer! Taurus! Red Dog! Omega! Unuscione! Stand down!" A voice barked. The five backed off Falcon, and Thunderbolt, who was getting to his feet. A muscular man clad in camo pants, black combat boots, and a black muscle shirt walked up to the group. He had a whistle around his neck, his short black hair was under a drill sergeant's hat, and his eyes were covered by mirrored Oakleys.

"Welcome to the Slaughterhouse, maggots!" He barked. "My name is Sergeant Slaughter! I see yout two have met my Renegades!" He pointed at the brown-haired man. "Mercer, an ex-Cobra Viper who has seen the light and defected." Mercer sneered at the Joe and West Coast Misfit. Sarge pointed at the bald Eastern European. "Taurus, a former circus performer with an enjoyment for fighting." Taurus crossed his arms. "And Red Dog, a former NFL player who got expelled for constant unnecessary roughness." 

"I like to beat up people!" Red Dog grinned. He ripped the sand sack at the end of his staff open with his teeth, adding a snarl. 

"And my two newest recruits." Sarge smirked. "Carmella Unuscione. Second generation in a wrestling family from New York City. She served time in juvi for accidentally killing a competitor with her powers. She is the Toughest Woman Alive, and she's got a mean streak ten miles long. She has the mutant power to generate a force field that gives her superhuman strength and invulnerability." Carmella used her forcefield to break open a boulder. She did it to show off, then she threw an obscene gesture at Kyle. The youngest Wildfire sneered. Sarge pointed at Mike. "And my final recruit, from Miami. Michael Nagrite, codename Omega." 

"It's okay, Sarge. I already familiarized Kyle with my talents." Mike chuckled. Sarge nodded. He looked at Falcon and Kyle.

"These five were the worst of the worst. I took them and made them the best! These five are my perfect soldiers! And I am going to make _you_ into perfect soldiers as well!" Sarge barked. "Renegades, time for the welcoming! We're going home. Falcon and Thunderbolt, you're walking." Carmella laughed.

"The base is 30 miles from here, Kylie." Carmella laughed. "We'll give you some water and a map, but you're on your own from there."

"Don't call me Kylie, you cow." Kyle growled. Omega chuckled.

"Well Kyle, now you're on the receiving end." Kyle laughed at Mike's statement.

"I can **fly** me and Falcon there." Kyle laughed.

"Good point." Sarge nodded. "Mercer, collar!" Mercer put a thin silver metal and plastic collar around Kyle's neck. "A little souvenir we picked up when we once raided a base of Magneto's." Carmella snarled at the mention of the Master of Magnetism.

_Too bad he escaped before I got my hands on him._ Carmella snarled. _I **will** get Magneto, and I **will** break his neck. Thanks to him, my father is in prison for the rest of his life!_

"That collar neutralizes mutant powers." Sarge explained. "We used it to help train Omega and Carmella. Now let the training begin!"

Hoo boy! Things are going to go really wrong for Falcon and Kyle, I just know it! What'll happen next? Can Flacon and Kyle survive? What is Cobra up to? What about everyone else? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly! 


	13. Plans Revealed!

GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!

To Metal Dragon1: Yep, I'm gonna keep on asking until you put the next chapter up! And I did pick up on Firestorm. Well, he somehow got Unus put in prison, and Carmella has sworn revenge.

To Wizard1: Actually, Omega is a character belonging to Descendant. He's the star of "Brotherhood Evolution", a real good and funny fic! You should read it! Omega Red had different powers. He had tentacles, but they emitted deadly pheromones. Mike's do not.

To Sparky Genocide: Well, descendant did let me use him, and I thought he'd make a good Renegade. He's the counterpart to Carmella. His cool head helps keep her hot temper in check. Carmella doesn't think of herself as a Misfit. She looks down on the Misfits. She thinks of herself as a Renegade. So does Omega, but he has respect for the Misfit teams. 

To descendant: I'm glad you liked it. And I'm glad you liked the way I interpreted Omega. I imagined him as the type who was cool under pressure, and has a bit of a "Yeah, whatever" attitude. 

To Red Witch: Have fun on your vacation!

It's Profile Time again! *Crowd hoots, hollers, screams, chants, and claps* This time, we look at one of the new Joe recruits, Hi-Tech!

Hi-Tech

Real Name: David P. Lewinski

Class: Altered human

Affiliation: Army

Rank: E-4

Powers: Thanks to an act of goofiness in a lightning storm, Hi-Tech's brain was modified with new pathways that allowed him to mentally access and control electronic devices. He can command computers to display information he desires, to turn themselves off (He has to turn a device on manually to be able to control it), and he can use his powers to "read" the health of electronics and circuits. He also has displayed signs of enhanced memory ability. He is often mistaken as a mutant because of it. His powers have also given him some hacking talent. Hi-Tech has no X-Gene.

Primary Military Specialty: Armament Research & Design, Electronic Warfare

Secondary Military Specialty: Telecommunication, Electronic Research and Development

Birthplace: St. Paul, Minnesota

Motto (From his filecard, found on YoJoe.com): "If it isn't alive or art, I can fix it" 

Bio: From when he could turn on a computer, Hi-Tech was fascinated by mechanical and electronic devices. He would often take apart old video game cartridges and other assorted items to see how they worked.

At the age of twelve, Hi-Tech was working in a junkyard in a lightning storm. He made the mistake of taking apart a radio when he was struck by lightning, which also hit the radio. Somehow, the lighting-charged electronics mutated his brain. In the hospital, he discovered he could mentally command his room's television to change channel simply by mental command. He practiced this talent in secret, and he used it to help with his hobby of repairing electronics. 

Hi-Tech is a kind-hearted soul who just can't say no. He often spends his free time helping to repair the electronics of other Joe members. He doesn't mind, because he likes to think of it as practice. In the GI Joe team, Hi-Tech maintenances electronic offensive and defensive systems that the team uses against Cobra. 

Chapter 13: Plans Revealed!

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(Cobra La)

"What _is_ this place?" Lady Jaye asked Zanya. The Joes were held in a cell in Cobra La's prison. Bulldog and Jester noted the bars were made from what appeared to be odd-looking crabs.

"Amazing." Bulldog noted. "Lionheart, Jester! Look at this! Somehow these crazy Cobra La people managed to combine technology and animals." 

"Wow. Robo-Crabs." Lionheart poked a crab shell, and she got shocked. "Eep! Hey! Crabs can't do that!"

"These can." Zanya smirked. 

"Look you little brat-" Bulldog reached through the bars in an attempt to grab Zanya, but he got shocked. "YIIIII!!!!!" 

"Talk about a shocking development." Jester chuckled. 

"Shut up Jester." Cover Girl groaned.

"I see you have met the capabilities of Cobra La." Golobulus hovered over to the entrapped Joes. 

"Eww, it's a mutant version of the Glob." Lionheart's face twisted in disgust.

"What is this place?" Lady Jaye snapped.

"The last remaining vestiges of a great civilization." Golobulus responded. "You see, we were the original rulers of Earth. That is, until your Ice Age came along. We ended up driven underground because of man. Man's ability to adapt to temperature changes and their growing intelligence allowed them to drive us underground. You creatures should _never_ have taken over! So we planned, and observed. We also witnessed the emergence of your next phase in evolution: The mutant population of the world."

"Yes." Pythona laughed, looking at Zanya. "Some mutants possess great powers. I have seen your mutant children. What do you call them? The East Coast and West Coast Misfits, ah yes. Well, with the new project I have Dr. Mindbender and the one called Virus working on, they will be of no concern." The Joes growled.

"Ha!" Zanya scoffed. "Good luck getting _those_ two to work together. Dr. Mindbender and Virus are very arrogant and they don't like each other. Virus specializes in machines, and he doesn't think too highly of organic life-forms that aren't named Althea and can control water. Dr. Mindbender is a geneticist, and he thinks Virus is a stupid loudmouthed psycho punk."

"He _is_ a stupid, loudmouthed psychotic punk who hates all organic life." Lionheart grumbled.

"Why are you after the BET?" Roadblock asked.

"I really was hoping Cobra Commander could retrieve it for me, but as usual, his forces failed. He shamed his fellow warriors of Cobra La."

"WHAT?!" The Joes yelled.

"Yes, the one you call Cobra Commander is a native of Cobra La. He was a scientist that we sent to hopefully destroy humanity. He disfigured himself when an experiment went wrong in his lab. But, he was a bumbler." He pointed to the next cell. In it was a very unhappy Cobra Commander, cursing under his breath. He was held to the wall. "However, I have a new plan to take back our planet. As you know, the BET can send energy anywhere. I plan to send some mutagenic pods I created up over the planet. I will use the BET to provide the heat energy needed to allow the pods to mature. Once they do, they'll explode, blanketing the earth in spores. The spores will turn every human on the planet into mindless snake animals, then Cobra La will retake its rightful place as the rulers of the Earth!" Golobulus held up a pod, a brown football-shaped thing. "Allow me to demonstrate." He held the pod up to Cobra Commander. The pod exploded, covering the commander in his spores.  

"Oh my God!" Lady Jaye cried in shock.

Uh oh! Looks like our heroes are in really big trouble now! Will Golobulus's plan succeed? Will Cobra get their claws on the BET? Does Virus really hate organic life? What are the Joes and the Renegades up to? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly! 


	14. Escape!

GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!

To Metal Dragon1: When's the next chapter of "Take the Long Way Home" coming up? Please put it up! It's a great story!

To Red Witch: COME BAAAAAAACK!!!!!!!

To Aaron: Yup, Thunderbolt and Falcon are staying with the Renegades for a while. I'm glad you like Carmella and Mike. 

To Wizard1: Yeah, you should. "Brotherhood Evolution" is a very good story. It's funny at times. In one chapter, the Brotherhood discusses way of killing Pietro for betraying them. It's real funny! What does Virus think Althea is? I dunno. (Virus: A goddess…*sighs longingly*)

To Sparky Genocide: Now there's some nice ideas! I'll see what I can do! Thanks! 

It's Profile Time Again! *Huge crowd hoots, hollers, cheers, screams, and claps in delight.* Now, we look at a Joe who is considered one of the few "sane" Joes around. He's a master chef and a master gunner, Roadblock!

Roadblock

Real Name: Marvin F. Hinton

Affiliation: Army

Rank: Sergeant First Class

Primary Military Specialty: Heavy Machine Gunner, Infantry Heavy Weapons

Secondary Military Specialty: Cook, Misfit Handler (Toad and Blob)

Birthplace: Biloxi, Mississippi

Bio: When Roadblock was a kid, no one expected this rather large Southern boy to be a member of GI Joe. As a kid, he was a member of his church choir and a Boy Scout. His big dream is to be a gourmet chef. When he grew up, his size came to his advantage when he took a job as a bouncer. He saved up his wages so he could hopefully study at the Escoffier School in France, a cooking school.

He was convinced to join the Army when a recruiter claimed they could train him as well. Roadblock took well to Army life, except he found Army cooking horrible. In the Infantry, he became skilled with his specialty weapon, an M-2 Browning .50 caliber heavy machine gun, a weapon that most soldiers can't even lift! The gun earned him a spot on the GI Joe team.

While doing recon in the jungle, Roadblock and his unit found a battered and beaten Todd Tolensky, the future Misfit codenamed Toad. Toad had just been abandoned and thrown out of a jet to die by Magneto and the Brotherhood. Toad befriended the Joe, and Roadblock ended up becoming the Joe guardian to him. Later, when Toad's former teammates Blob, Avalanche, Scarlet Witch, and Quicksilver ended up living with the Joes, Roadblock also ended up caring for Fred Dukes, codename Blob. Roadblock found that Blob had a love and talent for cooking, and the Joe is helping Blob nurture that talent.

Chapter 14: Escape!

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(Renegade HQ)

The headquarters of the Renegades was basically an old jumbo jet that crashed into a big rock. An exhausted Kyle Wildfire and Falcon trudged into the airplane entrance. They noticed the Renegades, except for Carmella, sitting at a table. They looked like they were cleaning up from a meal. Now, why didn't Kyle fly himself and Falcon to the plane? He couldn't. The Renegades put a collar on Kyle that shut off his mutant abilities, forcing him and Falcon to march 30 miles.

"Remind me to break Unuscione's neck." Kyle panted.

"I'll remind you if you remind me to _kill_ Hawk for this." Falcon wheezed. Omega smiled as he approached the guys.

"You're late. You missed dinner." He said. "You should've arrived earlier."

"**_ALRIGHT YOU PUNKS!!!!_**" Carmella's voice roared. Mercer, Taurus, Omega, and Red Dog yelped in fright. "**_WHICH ONE OF YOU STOLE MY DIARY?!_**" She stomped down. She sneered at Kyle and looked around. The four were gone. Sgt. Slaughter was left, and he was not intimidated by Carmella's attitude. Only one other person on earth was not intimidated by Carmella Unuscione, and that was Jake Wildfire. Kyle can remember one particular time when he was being bullied by Carmella…

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(The Bronx, six years earlier)

"Aaagh!" A seven-year-old Kyle Wildfire landed on the grass of the park, on his butt. A ten-year-old Carmella Unuscione stood over him, a smirk on her face, and fists on her hips. 

"Well shorty boy, you're just like your old man. A big joke." She grabbed Kyle by the front of his Legion of Doom shirt, and put his face up to hers. His eyes started tearing up. "Here, let me wipe those tears." She cocked back her free fist, only for her wrist to be held back. Carmella turned her head, and she found herself staring at the face of a ten-year-old Jake Wildfire.

"Back off, Carmella." He said simply. "Leave my brother alone." Carmella smirked. The Italian-American girl wrenched her fist away and dropped Kyle. 

"Ah. Big brother to the rescue, huh?" Carmella laughed. "Well Jake, as soon as I knock you flat, I'll knock the baby out." Jake just stared at Carmella with a fearless glint in his eye. He crossed his arms.

"Go ahead and try." 

"Okay." Carmella threw a punch, but the young Jake dodged, grabbed her arm, and flipped her over in a judo throw. "Wahhhhhh OW!!!" 

"Now leave my brother alone." 

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(Renegade HQ, Present time)

Kyle smirked. Carmella could _never_ get one over on Jake, no matter how hard she tried. The Italian-American girl growled as she looked around. She noticed a couch was shaking. And shuddering. A growling Carmella used her forcefield to knock the couch over, revealing Red Dog, Taurus, Mercer, and Omega hiding. They looked scared out of their minds.

"WE DON'T KNOW WHERE YOUR DIARY IS!!! **PLEASE** DON'T HURT US!!!!" The four screamed. 

"Uh, is this it?" Falcon held up a small black book with a gold lock on it. Carmella snatched the book, and smacked Falcon with it. "OW!! What'd I do?" 

"Don't mind her, Falcon. She can't be nice to anyone if the world depended on it." Kyle laughed.

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(Joe Infirmary)

Lina Chakram was feeling really down. It was bad enough that she was rejected by her family, but now her own _teammate_ rejected her. She couldn't understand what made Kyle believe medics were weak. She looked at the Misfits who sat with her. Quicksilver was knocked cold. He just lied there drooling with a huge lump on his head. Thunderbird was watching a wrestling match on the TV, and he was yelling. 

"You suck Randy Orton! I could beat you into the ground, you punk! Yeah, you'd better run, boy! You'd better run! Because if Mick Foley don't get you, I will!" John Proudstar yelled at the TV. Pyro was staring longingly at the fiery effigy he created of Angelica. 

"_Fire Angel/How I love you/You looks set my heart ablaze…_" Pyro sang. He then scribbled on a notepad. Evidently, he was working on lyrics. It was the fifth song he wrote today about Angelica. She sighed. 

"Is something wrong?" Lina turned and saw Jake Wildfire. 

"H-h-hi, Red Dragon." She said nervously. She was kind of creeped out by Jake's blue eyes. Even though they were warm, there was a bit of intensity in those eyes. Jake smiled.

"Hey, Dragonfly. Mind if I sit with you?" Jake pulled up a chair. Dragonfly shook her head.

"Why?" She asked Jake. "Why did Kyle brutalize me like that? What have I done to him to deserve that? Ever since I told him I was a medic, he's claimed over and over that I'm a coward." She started tearing up. "I'm not a coward. I just don't like to fight! Why doesn't he understand that?" Jake put a hand on her shoulder.

"I don't know. I don't know. I do see where you're coming from, though. Kyle doesn't see you as someone worth respecting because you don't admire him and you don't use your powers in the way he thinks they should be used." Jake reasoned. "He doesn't quite understand that one doesn't have to use their powers to fight to be able to do good things with them."

"Well, I shouldn't have been surprised." Lina sighed. "I have heard rumors that Kyle mouths off Stretcher all the time." 

"Well, Kyle is slightly afraid of doctors. You see, Kyle is deathly afraid of needles." Jake chuckled.

"That _would_ explain why in his records, he never got his booster shot." Lina blinked.

"Yeah, I remember we once took him to get his tetanus shot." Jake laughed. "You never heard a kid scream as much or as loud as Kyle did **that** day. It took six doctors to hold him down and one guy nearly got tinnitus!" Lina burst out laughing at the thought of the self-proclaimed mighty Thunderbolt cowering in fear of a needle. "Well, glad I could help. See ya!" Jake got up.

_Oh yes, Jake. You helped in a greater way than I thought._ Lina mentally laughed. She just had a great idea.

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(Cobra La)

"Roadblock! You and I are the strongest! Let's rush the door!" Bulldog said. 

"Right! Stand back everyone!" Roadblock ordered. He and Bulldog charged the door. Between Roadblock's natural strength and Bulldog's mutant strength, they could bring down the door. They did, but something went wrong. The door exploded in a big flash of light. "AHHHH!!!!!" Roadblock was blinded. Bulldog's eyes were protected by his mirrored shades.

"Alright everyone! Let's grab the Commander and go!" Bulldog and Davey Boy raced to the pod where the Commander was hanging. He was beginning his transformation into a snake. "Aw good God, Davey Boy! This ain't right!" 

_I know. We're rescuing this moron Cobra Commander!_ Davey Boy grumbled. Bulldog rolled his eyes. It wasn't what he meant. 

"Let's go Bulldog yeow!" Jester got grabbed by some vines, and the other Joes were being attacked by strange creatures. Some were like mutant brown dragonflies. Others were like iguanas that had necks and heads like cobras. 

"Help me!" Roadblock cried. "I can't see!"

"Come!" The mutated Cobra Commander said. "I know a way out! Through the river!" He and Roadblock escaped through a river that led out of Cobra La, unable to help the other Joes.

Well, looks like business is about to pick up, as Good ol' JR would say! What'll happen next? How will Roadblock get help? Will the other Joes be rescued? Will the Renegades whip Falcon and Kyle into shape? Will the Joes ever learn of the existence of Cobra La? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!                


	15. Insanity and a Mission!

**GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!**

To Wizard1: Oh yeah, Lina's plotting revenge against Kyle. In fact, after this fic, I plan to introduce a new villain! Oh, the Commander _will_ be returned to normal. And I think you'll be surprised by the way how he gets restored. BTW, when does the new chapter of  "Karaoke Dance Party" come up?!

To Aaron: Yeah, when Carmella's angry (Which is not rare), the Renegades run for cover!! I'm glad you liked this chapter. Kyle's dark nature is growing, you know. And who knows what could happen as a result!

To Sparky Genocide: I'm glad you enjoyed seeing the renegades fear Carmella! Thanks for the suggestions. I'll see what I can do!

To Red Witch: YAY!!! YOU'RE BACK!!! WHOO-HOO!!!!! BTW, I read "Mutants on Film"!! Love it! Will you bring in the Starr Brothers, please?! Maybe you can bring in Paul Starr as Dylan Hunter's friend, and Craig Starr as Dylan's Bodyguard. All I know is that Lance-zilla and Peter-mora are going to rampage Hollywood!

To Metal Dragon1: Oh yes, Lina did get an idea for revenge! Well, thank Sparky Genocide for the idea of Evo-tizing Carmella. Anyway, when will the next chapter of "Take the Long Way Home" come up? I just **_HAVE_** to read it! I want to see Kid Razor make another appearance! PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE!!!!!!!!!

It's Profile Time Again! *Crowd hoots, hollers, cheers, and claps* This time, we look at another one of the New Recruits, the mutant with Joe membership in his blood, Beast King!

Beast King

Real Name: Jack McCormick

Affiliation: Misfits (West Coast team)

Powers: Beast King has the ability to mentally alter his DNA to match any known animal. In essence, Jack can change into any animal. In his animal forms, he does maintain his intelligence, but cannot speak in most of these forms. He can only change into animals he's seen. He also, like Rahne Sinclair, the West Coast Misfit codenamed Wolfsbane, can change into a 'transitory' form or form characteristics of other animals, but that talent is rarely used. In animal form, Beast King can communicate with other animals. For example, if Beast King turns into a bee, he can communicate with other bees and tell them things. Beast King can switch animal forms in less than a quarter-second in the heat of battle. 

Birthplace: Malibu, California

Bio: As a child, Jack McCormick loved two things: visiting the Malibu Zoo, and surfing alongside his older cousin John, who would eventually go on to join GI Joe as Wipe-Out. He lived a relatively normal life as a surfer bum until one day. At the age of 18, Jack went to bed one night, and dreamed he was swinging in a jungle. He woke up the next morning to find himself an orangutan! 

Emma Frost came to meet the McCormicks alongside the Hellions. Frost hoped to recruit the shape-shifter, but as with the attempt to recruit Kyle Wildfire, the West Coast Misfit codenamed Thunderbolt, it turned into a disaster. The Hellion Monet St. Croix, known as M, learned of Jack's relation to Wipe-Out, and she made a derogatory comment about him and GI Joe. In anger (Beast King looks up to Wipe-Out), Beast King transformed into a woodpecker and attacked her head! The Hellions tried to defend their comrade, but Beast King's ability to switch animal modes in less than a second confused and threw them off. The fight was finished by Beast King turning into a bee, and calling all the bees in a nearby hive to attack the Hellions. As they ran away, Wipe-Out arrived to visit, wondering what the heck was going on. Beast King's parents explained to Wipe-Out, and the surfer suggested Beast King join the Misfits. Beast King accepted. 

Note: Beast King is every bit the surfer bum as Wipe-Out. Beast King is a certified lifeguard and surfing instructor. 

Chapter 15: Insanity and A Mission!

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(A lounge)

Firestar, Spyder, Beast King, and Longshot were all lounging around. The four mutants were discussing where they were going.

"Spyder and I are going to the East Coast Team." Angelica sighed. "Whoopie. That nut Pyro keeps giving me flowers and calling me Fire Angel." 

"Longshot here and I are _totally_ going West Coast, dudettes." Jack laughed. "Blondie's gone ga-ga over that Dazzler chick." He pointed at Longshot, who was staring into space with a silly grin on his face. "Dude…hello? Hello? Earth to Longshot?" He snapped his fingers in front of the Mojoworld native's face. Nothing happened.

"Man Longshot, you need help." Spyder shook her head, sipping juice from a straw.

"Dude, my family loves this! This'll get you laughing!" Jack turned into a chicken and started doing a goofy dance and clucking. Angelica and Spyder burst out laughing. Psyche-Out peeked in.

"Uhm, can I talk to the four of you for a second?" The Joe psychiatrist asked. The new mutants walked out, except for Longshot.

"She thought I was cute…" He sighed. Psyche-Out led Angelica, Jack, and Spyder to a window. Jack turned into a parrot and landed on Psyche-Out's shoulder. Psyche-Out motioned to what was happening on the other side. It was a screaming Hardcase. He was being attacked by Law's dog Order and Snake-Eyes' wolf, Timber. They were ripping at his pants. 

"Can you kids explain this?" 

"Awk! Looks like Hardcase really loves animals! Awk!" Jack replied in his parrot form. 

"Now from what I've heard, somebody soaked Hardcase's underwear, all of it, in meat. Funny, but wrong. Very wrong." Psyche-Out said. He crossed his arms. "Do you have any idea who did it?" The three looked at each other.

"Maybe it was that moron Pietro." Spyder shrugged. They heard giggling. 

"I guess you got your answer." Angelica said. Psyche-Out looked out the window and saw a laughing Trinity hovering over the screaming Joe. Paul ran up to Angelica, carrying some chocolates.

"Here, Angie. From St. John." Paul handed Angelica the chocolates. She groaned.

"Remind me to smack that psycho Aussie when he gets out of the infirmary." Angelica groaned. She held up a book St. John gave her. "He wrote this for me. It's some gothic novel." She opened it. Paul noticed the title on the book: "Moonlight Metal". 

"Uh oh." Paul gulped. Angelica's eyes widened.

"**_OH MY GOD!!!!_****_ SHE'S DOING WHAT WITH A GUITAR?!?!?!?!?!_**" 

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(Meeting Room, Renegade HQ)

"Carmella, get Falcon and Kyle in here!" Sarge ordered. He and the other Renegades were gathered around a table. Carmella nodded and got up. She grinned as she walked outside. She had dug a big pit, put live angry scorpions in it, then threw Falcon and a powerless Thunderbolt in it. The two spent the past two hours screaming and dodging scorpion strikes. 

"Carmella, get us out!" Falcon screamed. Carmella crossed her arms.

"You wusses! This is to help you improve your ability to react." Carmella grumbled.

"Carmella Unuscione, so help me God, get the Thunderbolt out of here, or the Thunderbolt will find a way to get this collar off, then give you the **mother of all shocks!**" Kyle snapped. Carmella smirked.

"Ahh, shut your mouth!" Carmella snapped. She threw down one end of a rope, then activated her forcefield. "You clowns are lucky. We got a mission, and you're joining us unfortunately." Falcon and Kyle grabbed the rope. With one mighty tug, Carmella pulled them up. 

"WAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!" Kyle and Falcon were sent flying. They hit the ground hared with an "OOF!!!!!!!!!" Carmella unceremoniously grabbed them by their collars and forced them to their feet.

"C'mon, you morons! We got a mission, and the Sarge doesn't like to wait!" Carmella said.

"I thought you don't like people ordering you around." Kyle smirked. Carmella glared. She huffed and walked to the HQ. 

"Man, what's her problem." Falcon whispered to Kyle. Kyle shrugged.

"She has problems. Major problems." Kyle whispered back with a snicker. The three entered.

"Wow, Carm. You must be mellowing. Normally, you beat up the new guys, then drag 'em in." Mike snickered. Carmella grumbled.

"Shut up, Sunshine." She grumbled, going back to her seat.

"Glad you're here." Sarge chuckled at Kyle and Falcon. Kyle pulled at his collar with a grumble. "Anyway, we got word that several members of GI Joe have been captured in the mountains. They have no idea where they could be. We've been ordered by Duke to invade a Terror Drome there and see if we can extract any information."

"Sounds easy." Mike scoffed.

"Think you clowns can handle it?" Carmella smirked at Falcon and Kyle.

"Up your nose with a rubber hose, Unuscione." Kyle snarled. 

"How will we be able to sneak in?" Falcon wondered. Sergeant Slaughter smirked.

"Ask Mercer. He used to be a Cobra Viper. He knows."

Well, the Renegades have got a mission! Can they pull it off? What of the others? What'll happen next? Will our heroes win? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!  


	16. Attack on the TerrorDrome!

GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!

To Wizard1: When are you putting up the next chapter of "Karaoke Dance Party?" I NEED TO READ IT!!!!! PLEASE!!!!!

To Red Witch: Glad you liked the part with the scorpions! What're you up to next?

To Sparky Genocide: I thought Firestar would react that way to Pyro's book. That sounds like a good suggestion! I would not be surprised if Carmella and Kyle are more interested in trying to knock each other senseless rather than concentrate on the mission. 

To Metal Dragon1: Yeah, I saw that scene in the commercial and I thought it'd be funny to put in. Well, Kyle's collar _may_ come off… And by the way, I think a Terror Drome is like a Cobra outpost.

It's Profile Time again! *Crowd hoots, hollers, cheers, and claps* This time, we look at a member of the Joe team that is not afraid to charge into battle, who always stood up for right, and who has a bit of an obsession complex: Lionheart!

Lionheart

Real Name: Hannah Dawson

Rank: Corporal

Class: Mutant

Powers: Lionheart has the mutant talent to telepathically communicate with any member of the cat family. She can also charge her fingernails with energy, transforming them into extendable "laser claws". The claws can extend up to eight inches in length, and they can slice through tempered steel (The laser claws are powerful enough to slash through Cobra's most advanced models of Battle Android Troopers).

Primary Military Specialty: Fixed-Wing Aircraft Pilot (Single & Multi-Engine) 

Secondary Military Specialty: Intelligence, Infantry 

Sent to GI Joe from England's Royal Air Force

Birthplace: London, England

Bio: Born and raised in the rough streets of London, Hannah and her older (by two years) brother, the GI Joe codenamed Bulldog, lived rough childhoods. Their father left their mother before she was even born. At the age of four, Lionheart and Bulldog's mother was attacked and murdered by street punks. The incident traumatized Bulldog, but Lionheart barely remembers her. They ended up living with their Aunt Edina and Uncle James.

Lionheart grew to be a sweet girl, but she tended to have a bit of a mouth. Young Lionheart discovered she had a talent for quips, and a love of airplanes. She also tended to have a slight obsession complex around boys she liked (Nothing _really_ psychotic).

At puberty, Lionheart's feline telepathy emerged when she heard the thoughts of her cat Muffin. She unwillingly unsheathed her laser claws in front of her adopted parents. Luckily, they accepted her special gifts. 

At the age of 18, Lionheart joined the Royal Air Force, and quickly became known as much for her flying prowess as her love of verbal comedy. (It's believed she also served with British Intelligence, but much of that is classified)

Lionheart, along with Bulldog, were selected by their CO to join GI Joe in America as part of a special training program. The siblings became handlers to the East Coast Misfit team. In GI Joe, Lionheart developed a crush on Pyro's handler, the GI Joe codenamed Barbecue. She constantly chases him around, much to his torment.

Chapter 16: Attack on the Terror-Drome!

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(Renegade HQ)

"Okay girls, that's the plan! Any questions?" Sarge asked. Omega raised his hand. "Mike."

"Why don't we make it interesting?" Mike smirked. "Let's make it educational." Sarge nodded.

"Alright." He said. "Renegades, we're goin' in with no weapons."

"No weapons?!" Falcon exclaimed. "How can we take down a Terror Drome without weapons?"  

"We improvise!" Sarge snapped. "You got a brain! A soldier has to be able to _think_!" 

"Thinking. Not a Wildfire's strong suit, huh Kylie?" Carmella smirked at Kyle. Kyle glared.

"You should talk, Spaghetti-head." Kyle glared. "So, will the Thunderbolt be allowed to use his powers?" 

"You're being trained. None of us are using our weapons." Sarge said.

"So, Carm, you or I aren't using our powers." Omega said. He put on a control collar, and so did Carmella.

"I never needed my powers to win a fight." Carmella smirked.

"Even if you _could_ use your powers, you'd never beat my brother. You _never_ were able to take my brother down." Kyle spat. Carmella glared.

"_You_ are not Jake Wildfire." Carmella spat back.

"Alright, kids." Sarge said. "Mercer, guide us through." Mercer used a pointer to guide the soldiers. "The Terror-Drome has a ventilation point here. The layout has barely changed since my days as a Viper." He started. The ex-Viper led the Renegades through the map. "…And here we can reach the central computer and get out the information. The radio room is next door." Mercer finished.

"Easy." Omega laughed. "_Too easy!_" 

"Let's do this!" Taurus said.

"Alright!" Red Dog laughed.

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(Cobra Terror-Drome, an hour later)

In a guard room, two Vipers were talking.

"I'm telling you, there is no **way** that Spider-Man could take the Hulk!" Viper #1 said. "A cousin of mine saw the Hulk tear apart a town!"

"Spider-Man can beat anybody!" Viper #2 said. "Even the Hulk! I saw him in action take on this overmuscled psycho with a tongue, sharp teeth, and black costume. He **whooped** 'im! Real good, baby!" They felt a tap on the shoulder. 

"Huh?" The two turned and saw Carmella. 

"Hello, ya mooks!" Carmella punched them out, then knocked their heads together. She waved the other Renegades, Falcon, and Kyle. 

"Yeah, steal a play from Hogan's book." Kyle chuckled at Carmella. 

"Shut up, Kylie." Carmella snarled. The Renegades held the guns racked on the wall.

"Sweet." Red Dog grinned. 

"Alright." Falcon nodded. "Let's go!" 

"You heard the man, Renegades!" Sarge ordered. The Renegades charged to the radio room. Omega turned on the computer.

"I got it! I know where the captured Joes are! They're in a place called Cobra La in the mountains!" He pulled out a printout.

"Let's go!" Sarge ordered. The Renegades were about to leave when the alarm klaxon sounded.

"Aw great!" Omega grumbled. "Who sounded the alarm?" 

"It must've been automated!" Kyle realized. 

"Sarge, may we-?" Omega tugged at his collar. Sarge nodded. "Let's party!" Omega, Carmella, and Kyle took off their collars. Kyle let some electricity flow between his fingers.

"Jabroni-beating time!" Kyle smirked. Several Vipers ran in. "Ha!" Kyle blasted the Vipers with a thunder attack. Carmella and Omega took care of some others: Carmella smacked some Vipers around with her forcefield, and Omega grabbed one with his tentacles and used the Viper as a club to smack the others. Sarge tried to operate the radio, but a stray tracer bullet hit the radio, shorting it out.

"Nuts!" Sarge grumbled.

"Looks like we're fighting our way out!" Falcon said, firing his rifle.

Hoo boy! Looks like things are about to go really insane! What'll happen next? Can the Renegades, Falcon, and Kyle escape the Terror Drome and tell the Joes about the prisoners? Will Cobra attack? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!


	17. Attacks and New Problems!

GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!

To Sparky Genocide: Oh, I hope to put in some somebody-kicking-Pietro's-butt in soon!

To Wizard1: Glad you liked the butt-whoopin'! Yeah, I think that Pyro should've kept his books away from Angelica! Yeah, Carmella should **never** be messed with Here's some more madness for everyone! And that $10 is money in the bank! Yeah, the meat underwear came from Cheaper By The Dozen! PLEASE PUT UP CHAPTER FOUR SOON!!!! 

To Red Witch: Too bad you won't put the Starr Brothers in. Oh, this I have got to see! Read the new chapter of "Mutants on Film" and loved it! 

It's Profile Time Again! Since we looked at Lionheart last time, It'd only be appropriate to take this opportunity to look at her older brother, Bulldog!

Bulldog

Real Name: Bryan Dawson

Rank: Corporal

Affiliation: Royal Air Force

Class: Mutant

Powers: Bulldog can telepathically communicate with any member of the dog family. He also possesses superhuman strength. It's unknown how much strength Bulldog has. The most he has lifted at one time was 60 tons.

Primary Military Specialty: Fixed-Wing Aircraft Pilot, Single and Multi-engine

Secondary Military Specialty: Infantry, Bladed-Combat Instructor (Bulldog is an expert fencer and swordsman) 

Sent to GI Joe from the Royal Air Force of Great Britain

Birthplace: London, England

Bio: Born two years before his sister Lionheart, Bulldog grew up in the tough streets of London. At the age of two, Bulldog's father left him and his mother, who was pregnant with Lionheart. When Bulldog was six, he and Lionheart lost their mother to street punks. Bulldog was traumatized by the incident, and to this day, he blames himself for his mother's death. 

Raised by his Aunt Edina and Uncle James, Bulldog hated living with his aunt and uncle, despite the fact he was never abused by them. He ended up a troublemaker, stealing and causing general mayhem throughout the neighborhood. 

At thirteen, he discovered his "canine telepathy" when cops sent their dogs on him, and they turned! He also discovered his strength in a brawl when he punched a guy and sent him flying across the street! At the age of 18, Bulldog was offered a choice by the courts: Join the military, or face a life behind bars. Not wanting to go to jail, Bulldog chose the former.

In the Air Force, Bulldog's hot temper was cooled, and he befriended the GI Joe known as Big Ben. He also traced his lineage out of curiosity, and discovered he and Lionheart were distant relatives of one of the knights of King Arthur's legendary Round Table! Bulldog started taking an interest in chivalry and knights in general, learning the art of swordfighting. As part of a special training program, he and Lionheart were sent to America and GI Joe. They became handlers of the future East Coast Misfit team. 

When the siblings met the X-Men for the first time, Bulldog found himself attracted to the X-Man Ororo Munroe, codenamed Storm. It's caused him to constantly fight with the GI Joe codenamed Shipwreck.

Chapter 17: Attacks and New Problems!

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(Terror-Drome)

"There's too many of 'em!" Mercer exclaimed.

"I planted the bomb!" Sarge exclaimed. "Let's go! We wither go bye bye or boom boom!" The Renegades escaped the Terror-Drome as it exploded. "Fantastic." 

"Now how are we going to warn the Joes, jabroni!" Kyle snapped at the Sarge.

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(The base)

"I feel great! I can't believe I recovered so quickly!" Lina smiled as she walked out of the infirmary alongside Firestar and Spyder.

"Yeah. Amazing." Spyder agreed. "I guess the Thunderbolt didn't hurt you as bad as we thought." 

"The metal floor absorbed most of the electrical attack." Angelica explained. "Man, Thunderbolt went nuts back there! What got into him?"

"Don't mention him." Siryn grumbled as she walked by. "I am seriously considering kicking him off the team." 

"He _did_ ask for it." Lina sighed.

"Uh-huh." The other two agreed. They heard an explosion and an alarm sound. "YIKES!!!" A load of Cobra Rattlers came over the base, dropping bombs like rain. 

"WHAT THE--?" Duke roared.

"We're on it!" Ace flew into action in his F-16. Several other Joes flew planes in as well. 

"All those who can fly, Let's go!" Siryn ordered. She took to the air, alongside Red Dragon, Sunfire, Firestar, and Beast King, who turned into a pterodactyl. The flying Misfit members aided the Joe jets as best they could. 

"Hey look!" Sunfire pointed  at what appeared to be giant dragonflies and other insects flying in. "What?" He nearly got shot down by Serpentor in his flying chariot. 

"**_COBRAAAAAAAA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!_**" Serpentor crowed the battle cry. The giant insects fired laser beams left and right. It forced the Joe jets and the flying Misfits to concentrate more on flying defensively, making them vulnerable. The ground troops weren't faring much better. The Vipers and HISS Tanks were joined by Cobra-La Guards. As well as what appeared to be giant maggot-like tanks. They also were ambushed by huge ground dwelling worms. The insect-like land animals were gumming up the tanks and upturning them.

"Nuts!" Shipwreck snarled. He started going into a cursing fit as he attacked some Cobra La guards with his bare hands.

"Man, even Cobra's army and air force are ugly!" Ace grumbled as he fired his claw lasers at several guards. 

"No kidding!" Blob agreed. He was pounding at a tank. 

"**_WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!_**" A sonic scream rained down on the ground-based Misfits. 

"SIRYN, CUT THE SCREAM!!!!" Toad yelled.

"IT'S NOT SIRYN!!!!" Rahne and Althea screeched. A figure flew out of the sky and landed in front of the mutants. It looked a lot like Nemesis Enforcer, only blue instead of pink. Its arms and chest appeared to be made of metal and robotic in nature. It also had hair: Long, wild, and black. The white bat-like wings also had mechanical trim. 

"Uh oh." The teenage mutants said together. The creature snarled.

"Me Gilgacon." The creature snarled. "And me destroy Misfits! Me have all Misfit powers!" He demonstrated by calling on Avalanche's powers. Pythona smirked as she observed. 

"Yes, Virus and Dr. Mindbender do work well together." She chuckled. Meanwhile, Duke was grappling with Serpentor III. 

"You think you can stop me?" Serpentor laughed. "I have fought since time immemorial!" 

"Fight this!" Duke flipped Serpentor into a monkey flip. He and the serpent-man glared at each other. 

"Ha!" Falcon charged Serpentor III and rammed him with a shoulder tackle. 

"Falcon!" Duke said. Lina ran up to Duke.

"Are you injured?" 

"No, I'm alright." Duke replied. Serpentor glared at Falcon, unsheathing a snake javelin from his costume. 

"You think you can stop me, mere human?" Serpentor snarled. He raised the javelin. "No one can stop Cobra La! Die, arrogant Earth scum!" He threw the javelin at a shocked Falcon. 

"NOOOOOOO!" Duke ran into the path, and he got impaled through the heart! 

"No! Duke!" Falcon and Lina raced toward a downed Duke. Kyle saw the whole thing, and his blood boiled. However, it wasn't Serpentor he was in the mood to kill for this.

"YOU!!! THIS WAS YOUR FAULT!!!" Kyle grabbed Lina and started choking her. "IF YOU HAD TAKEN ON SERPENTOR, DUKE WOULD HAVE A HOLE IN HIS HEART!!! YOUR FAULT!!! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT, CHAKRAM!!!! IF DUKE DIES, HIS BLOOD IS ON YOUR HANDS!!!" Lina blasted Kyle's face with some silk and flew away in fright. Kyle, with a roar, ripped off the silk. He formed a chain from blue lightning, and pitched one end. The chain wrapped around Lina's throat and forced her to the ground. "GET BACK HERE MURDERER!!!"  

"Kyle, stand down!" Falcon ordered. Kyle turned around. His hair was black, and his glowing eyes were blue. 

"Who said I was Kyle?" He laughed.   

Oh great! Just when things couldn't get any worse! What'll happen next? What the heck happened to Kyle Wildfire? Will Cobra and their unusual allies get the BET? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!  


	18. Darkbolt Strikes!

GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!

WHOO HOOOOOO!!!!!! 86 reviews! A new record! Yes! Yes! Yes! ALRIGHT!!!! YEAH BABY YEAH!!!!

To Wizard1: Yeah, Kyle's not Kyle anymore! Oh, I can't wait for the new chapter! I can't wait! I can't wait! I can't wait! Yes! 

To Red Witch: Yup, things are going go crazy now, baby! Things just don't ever go right for the Misfits, do they? Can hardly wait for the next movie parody. BTW, read the new chapter of "Mutants on Film!" Love it! 

To Sparky Genocide: Well, Kyle is kind of possessed. It's similar to what happened to his older brother Jake in my story "Hotter than Hellion". You should check it out! It's real good! 

To Metal Dragon1: Huh. So **that's **why BR went with Firestorm. I hope Duke makes it, too. I really hope he does. BTW, when does the next chapter of "Take the Long Way Home" come up? 

To Aaron: Yeah, things just get worse and worse for the Misfits, do they? The Misfits had to fight Draconis before. However, Kyle's dark persona doesn't get stronger and stronger as he fights. That may help a little bit…

It's Profile Time Again! *crowd hoots, hollers, cheers, claps, and screams* This mutant was the subject of the first Profile Time segment. He does deserve another look considering he has changed quite a bit. So here he is, Virus!

Virus

Dreadnok Inventor and Electronic Warfare Specialist

Real Name: Vincent James

Affiliation: Dreadnoks

Class: Mutant

Hair: Brown

Eyes: Green

Powers: Virus has the power to transform his body into organic binary code, then take over anything electronic, operating it to his whim. He also recently developed a mutant instinct for invention, much like the mutant Forge.

Birthplace: London, England

Bio: Not much is known about the early life of Vincent James. Nor was it revealed how he joined the Dreadnoks or how his powers emerged. He made his first appearance on Cobra Island, using his talents to possess the Samurai-Tron, an invention of Airtight's designed for guard duty. The incident also revealed he had an obsession with East Coast Misfit Leader Althea Delgado, codename Wavedancer. 

Virus is smarter than any of the Dreadnoks, and quite cunning. However, he is extremely arrogant, and he tends to have a cowardly streak a mile wide. It's also believed Virus is severely mentally ill. 

It's believed that a mere glance from Althea may have caused Virus to have the delusion that he and Althea were a couple, and Toad was a monster out to ruin his life since the day he was born. Virus's possible mental illness has appeared to have grown over time, causing him to have the delusions that Althea is calling for help telepathically (It might actually be paranoid schizophrenia). 

Chapter 18: Darkbolt Strikes!

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(The Joe base)

It was a huge battle. Cobra's new allies, the odd creatures from Cobra La, allowed the ruthless terrorist organization a huge advantage. The GI Joe team, consisting of soldiers that were the best of the best in all the Armed Forces, had allies, as well. The Misfits, two teams of teenagers who were blessed with various superhuman powers by virtue of their genetic codes. Despite the powers of these kids, and the skills of the soldiers, GI Joe was getting beaten mercilessly. And one of their own had appeared to have gone mad.

"What do you mean you're not Kyle?" Falcon wondered. The black-haired Kyle look-alike smirked. 

"You heard me, you lousy soldier." The possessed Kyle laughed. "Call me Darkbolt." 

"Darkbolt." Falcon snarled. "What is going on?"

"Remember Draconis?" Darkbolt laughed. "He is to Jake is what I am to that moron Kyle Wildfire. It was so easy to take over his body. All I had to do was wait. Draconis was impatient. He wanted the body and the power and he was unwilling to wait for Jake to be at his weakest. I, however, am more patient than that." Darkbolt smirked. "I ambushed Kyle while he slept and took over. Heh. Not too hard to do. Did you like my performance? I knew every bit of Kyle's mannerisms."

"Why did you attack Lina, then? What's she done to you?" Falcon wondered. Darkbolt sneered at the struggling Dragonfly.

"The one thing Kyle and I can agree on. She is weak. A perfectly good set of mutant powers wasted. Wings that can slice steel, all put on the back of a coward. Those who don't fight fall first, I've always believed. And Lina makes _us_ weak. She is a pitiful creature, all that warrior potential, and she doesn't lack the fortitude necessary to use it." He formed a blade from his hand of blue lighting and menaced towards Lina, insane grin on his face. Lina tried to get away. "I'll make those wings into swords. They're the only part of you that's useful." 

"_Leave her alone!_" Falcon tried to ram Darkbolt. The evil electrokinetic smirked. 

"You're a fool." Darkbolt's eyes glowed. Falcon found himself frozen in place. He was numb, except for his mouth.

"I can't move!" 

"Of course." Darkbolt laughed. "Did you know the brain uses **electrical impulses** to send orders to the muscles? My powers over electricity allow me to control those signals. Kyle can't do that yet. Your brain can send a message to the leg, but I can reroute it to your arm. The only reason you live now is because I've allowed the signals to your involuntary nervous system to continue normally, as well as the nerves to your senses. The involuntary nervous system controls heartbeat among other stuff. I could overload the heart, killing you." Darkbolt shook his head. "Nah. You still entertain me. After I deal with this weak mound of flesh, I'll destroy everyone here." 

"Why?" 

"Because I can. No one can stop me." Darkbolt laughed.

"Think again." A voice snarled. Darkbolt turned around. "**_RAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!_**" Red Dragon lunged for Kyle in his Dragon Mode, and nailed the electrokinetic with a clothesline. "Kyle! It's me! C'mon! Fight your way out! C'mon, Kyle! It's me! I can beat Draconis and you can beat Darkbolt! I know you're in there! C'MON!!!!!" Darkbolt snarled.      

"I AM **SUPREME!!!!!!!**" Darkbolt charged his fists with his blue thunder and charged Red Dragon. Darkbolt fired a punch, but Jake blocked it.

"Evidently, you forgot. In this form, I get stronger and stronger the more I fight. I don't want to hurt you. Leave my brother alone." 

"Too bad, because I want to hurt **you!**" Darkbolt blasted Jake with a thunder-charged chop. He then fired more chops. With each chop, Jake staggered a little less. His ever-strengthening body was allowing him to resist the shocks. 

_I need a telepath here!_ Jake growled. _To fight Draconis, I was backed up by Jean, Fox, and Ace. None of the Misfits are telepaths. What do I do? How do I defeat an enemy that exists in someone's mind?_ Jake shoved Darkbolt back.

"We got the BET!!! Let's get out of here!" Zartan yelled.

"VICTORY!!!" Serpentor yelled triumphantly. "I'll leave you Joes to destroy each other." He and Cobra left triumphant. 

"What's going on?!" Hawk yelled.

"Kyle's gone mad! He's calling himself Darkbolt now!" Falcon yelled, holding his injured brother. Somebody give me a hand here!" Stretcher ran to do some first aid on Duke.

"It's not Kyle!" Jake exclaimed, grappling with Darkbolt. "It's Draconis all over again! We've got to reach Kyle!"

"How?!" Hawk said. "When Draconis was around, we had a telepath to help her." 

"No!" Darkbolt clutched his head. "Kyle! Stay away! This is **my** body now! You can't have it! Rrrrrr!" 

"Kyle! Fight him! Fight Darkbolt! You can face him!" Jake encouraged.

"What do we do?" Gunbarrel asked Hi-Tech. He snapped his fingers.

"I got an idea!" He grinned.

Aw man! Things are going crazy now? What's Hi-Tech's idea? Can Kyle fight off Darkbolt? What'll happen next? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!


	19. Another Aftermath!

GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!

WHOOOOO!!!!!!! 90 reviews! A new record! Yes! I love it! Yeah! Whooo yeah, baby!!! 

To Sparky Genocide: Yeah. Things just get worse and worse for our heroes, don't they? Hey, that's a good idea you got there with Trinity and Cobra Commander. Hee hee, I can see that.

To Wizard1: Well, Draconis's powers allow him to be arrogant. Like the Hulk, he grows stronger and stronger the more he fights. Therefore, it's very hard to beat him. Darkbolt's not the same, but he can do things with electricity that Kyle hasn't even dreamed of. I'll give you the fact that Hi-Tech **is** a Joe, and Joe plans tend be **very** risky despite their high success rate. Give the plan a chance, though. Good luck.

To Metal Dragon1: CC and Roadblock will reach the Pit soon. Very soon. The Joes will put the smackdown on Cobra La soon. Very soon. You know, that does sound like an interesting idea, an all-animal unit in GI Joe. You got Snake-Eyes's wolf Timber, Law's dog Order, Mutt's dog Junkyard, Shipwreck's parrot Polly, Spirit's eagle Freedom, and Firestorm's monkey Blast Radius. They could be led by Beast King, because he can turn into any animal! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!!!! By the way, when does the next chapter of "Take The Long Way Home" come up? Please put it up! I can't wait! I just CAN'T WAIT, MAN!!!!! 

HH

To Aaron: Yeah, I could imagine Darkbolt being more patient and cool-headed than Kyle. Well, the fight wouldn't be that knock-down. Jake's powers allow him to get stronger and stronger in his Dragon Mode to a point where he could overpower Darkbolt, but he can't use that full power because Darkbolt's possessing Kyle's body. I wouldn't be surprised if Kyle ends up blaming Lina for the whole thing. And you can bet Kyle will **_not_** be happy about the ambush. Gilgacon was created by Virus and Mindbender. The rest of the team was busy with him. I do want to see Althea vs. Pythona in the final battle. 

It's Profile Time again! WHOOOOOO!!!!!!! *Crowd hoots, hollers, claps, screams, cheers, and chants* This time, we look at another of the New Recruits, a former member of the October Guard, Vorona!  
  


Vorona

Real Name: Daina L. Janack

Affiliation: Formerly of the October Guard

Rank: Lieutenant 

Primary Military Specialty: Small Arms Specialist, Marksman

Secondary Military Specialty: Helicopter Pilot, Tactical Expert

Birthplace: Ostrava, Czech Republic (formerly Czechoslovakia)

Bio: Not much is known about the early life of Vorona. However, she has a long history with GI Joe. She was one of the October Guard, the Warsaw Pact's response to the GI Joe team. Known as Volga in the Guard, she fought both the Joes and Cobra, alongside leader Colonel Brekhov, Heavy Weapons expert Horrorshow, Soviet airman Stormavik, the East German soldier Schrage, and later added a flame-thrower named Dragonsky. After some time, Brekhov, Stormavik, Schrage, and Horrorshow were replaced by naval officer Lt. Gorky and a trooper known as Sgt. Misha. Soon after the Soviet Union fell, the Guard broke up.

Over time, Daina grew to respect the Joe team, and after the Guard broke up, she stayed in the Czech Republic, where she became part of the Czech Special Forces. However, she grew tired of the difficulty over there, and she moved to the United States, where she petitioned for membership in the Joe team. 

Daina is an excellent sniper and a talented pilot, but she is really infamous for her bad temper.

Chapter 19: Another Aftermath!

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(The base)

"Uhhhhnh…" Siryn moaned. She and the Misfits had faced the cyborg monster known as Gilgacon. And the monster dominated them, using Red Dragon's DNA to grow stronger and stronger over the fight. It escaped with the rest of Cobra. 

"Bad news, yo." Velocity reported. "Xi, Toad, Wolfsbane, Darkstar, Lila, and Rictor are all out of action. They can't fight anymore for a while. And without Lifeline to heal them, they're in the infirmary for a while."

"Now what?" Althea grumbled. The two leaders looked at each other. 

"Great." Siryn sighed. "Just great. Now what?" 

"We should regroup." Althea nodded. "Where's Thunderbolt?" They heard a roar. 

"Uh-oh." The leaders said. The remaining Misfits rushed to the source.

"Dear God!" Wanda recoiled in horror. The Wildfire brothers were brawling. Jake was in his Dragon Mode. Kyle's hair turned black, and his electricity was blue. "What's going on?" 

"Draconis II." Beach Head replied. "Meet Darkbolt. Kyle's dark side come to life." The Joes watched, powerless to do anything. "He's behind Kyle's erratic behavior and his assaults toward Lina. Turns out he was in control of Kyle." 

"KYLE, FIGHT HIM!!!! I DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH LONGER I CAN HOLD BACK!!!!" Jake roared, desperately trying to prevent the chance he may have to seriously injure or do worse to Kyle's body to stop Darkbolt.

"**_KYLE IS DEAD!!!!!_**" Darkbolt roared. He smashed Jake hard with a lightning baseball bat. However, Jake's body kept on growing stronger, and was growing more immune to the electricity. He swatted Darkbolt away.

"Darkbolt, your attacks are growing less effective on me! Let me talk to Kyle! I can dent Colossus right now! Don't make do this! Let me talk to my brother!" 

"Oh, you'll join him aaaaaaaaah!!" Darkbolt pulled a dart out of his neck. "Who dares huhhhhhh." He fainted. 

"Bulls-eye!" Hi-Tech whooped. "Okay Airtight, get him to the machine!" 

"Machine?" Hawk wondered.

"Airtight has been working on a machine after the whole Draconis incident alongside Forge and Trinity." Jake replied. "It allows people to enter minds." 

"I haven't found a name for it yet, but it'll help us out here." Airtight grinned.

"We also got another problem." Chilljaw said. "Cobra's got the bloody BET."

"Great. One Misfit possessed, several more hurt, and Cobra has the BET."

"Not to mention that creature that had all our powers." Sunfire grumbled.

"It called itself Gilgacon." Vorona remembered.

"How appropriate. Named after Gilgamesh, the warrior king." Gunbarrel sighed.

"It appeared to be a cyborg of some kind." Lance said. "Half monster, half robot. Creepy."

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(Virus's makeshift base, Cobra La)

The room in Cobra-La that became Virus's makeshift lab was heavily modified by the mutant inventor. He was extremely disgusted by the organic nature of the room, so he started converting it into something completely mechanical, where he felt more comfortable. Zartan began to wonder if the inventor's mutation was causing his mind to warp even more than it already was.

"_WHOOO!!!!!!_" Virus squealed happily. Gilgacon slept on a slab with a cover over him. Evidently, the cyborg was in suspended animation. The psychotic mutant danced around the cyborg's "bed", singing happily. "_Oh happy day/The Toad was beaten/Oh happy day…_" He hugged the case. "Gilgacon, my greatest creation! I'm so proud of you! You whooped those bloody stupid Misfits! And I loved the way you smashed Toad's legs. Oh, it was so beautiful." Virus nuzzled the case happily. "The bloody Mindbender's creations never compared to mine! Oh, you're so great!" Buzzer shook his head as he watched.

"I swear, the little nutter's fallen in love with the thing." He chuckled to Torch.

"Nah. Virus seems like the type to date a mannequin." Torch laughed. The two Dreadnoks walked away, laughing.

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(The tunnels of Cobra-La)

Roadblock shivered as the cold snow hit him. The blinded Joe trudged through the snow. He was guided by Cobra Commander, who was mutating into a snake as they went. Now he was coiled around Roadblock, acting as the joe's eyes.

"I was once a man…" He moaned. "A man…"

"Oh man, things can't be anymore bad." Roadblock groaned. "And that snake's moaning is going to drive me mad!" 

Hoo boy! Things may finally be looking up! What'll happen next? Can Airtight's machine help free Kyle? Will Roadblock be able to stand Cobra Commander's whining? Has Virus finally cracked, or does he have some more mind to lose? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly! 


	20. Battle against Darkbolt!

GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!

To Red Witch: I would not be surprised if that **_does_** happen to Virus down the line. I would not be surprised at all.

To Wizard1: WHERE'S CHAPTER FOUR?!?!?!? YOU SAID IT'D BE UP TODAY!!!!!

It's Profile Time again! *crowd hoots, hollers, claps, screams, chants, and hollers* This time, we look at a Malibu Joe who can work with anything electrical, Fusebox! 

Fusebox

Real Name: Edward "Eddie" Polanski

Rank: Sergeant

Affiliation: Malibu Joes, United States Marine Corps

Primary Military Specialty: Electrician, Electronic Warfare

Secondary Military Specialty: Telecommunications

Birthplace: Seattle, Washington

Bio: Born in the same town as grunge rock and Starbucks, Eddie Polanski had electricity in the blood. His father, an immigrant from Poland, worked as a lineman for the electrical company. When he grew up, Eddie also took a job as a lineman, even though his parents wanted him to go higher up in life. 

Fusebox liked the job, but he wanted to make a real difference in life. Inspired by a commercial, Fusebox decided to join the Marines. In the Corps, he took up telecommunications, and he would help fix and faulty wiring on the base. 

He was recruited to the Joe Team by General Whithalf, who was visiting an old friend. The jeep that Whithalf was using had faulty wiring and would've exploded if Fusebox hadn't noticed and fixed it in time. 

Chapter 20: Battle against Darkbolt!

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(Airtight's Lab)

"Heave ho!" A couple Joes hoisted a knocked-out Darkbolt onto a slab. They used insulated straps to hold him down. A helmet was placed on his head. The helmet was attached to a device that looked like a futuristic refrigerator, with a screen on one side, and the door on the side next to it. Jake looked at the device. 

"This device, Jake, will allow you to enter Kyle's mind and hopefully use it to free him of Darkbolt." Airtight explained. "However, this does have risks." Jake nodded.

"Go on." The Boston native said simply. 

"Well, if Darkbolt manages to pull anything fatal…" Airtight gulped. Jake's eyes glowed.

"I beat my _own_ dark half, Airtight. I can take care of that dopey Draconis-wannabe." Jake said simply. He shifted into his Dragon Mode. "Besides, I'm practically invincible in this form."

"Yeah, but Darkbolt's more capable with his powers than Kyle is. He's done stuff that Kyle hasn't. He can actually turn your _own body's_ electrical impulses against you." Airtight said. Jake smirked.

"If I know Darkbolt, he does tend to show off a bit. He _is_ a part of my brother, after all." Jake laughed. He opened the door. "Wish me luck."

"Knowing you Jake, I doubt you'll need it. But good luck anyway." Airtight nodded. Jake went in the door, and he exploded in a flash of light. He found himself on a ramp. An arena, looking like it was ready for WWE SmackDown! He noticed Darkbolt standing in the ring, laughing at a beat-up Kyle. The Thunderbolt was chained to a post, and he looked like he had been beaten several ways over. Jake smirked. Here, he could unleash the full power of the Red Dragon on Darkbolt, and not worry about hurting his brother. 

"Hey jabroni!" Jake called, using Kyle's line. Kyle looked up and smiled weakly.

"Big brother…" 

"So, you think you can handle me in my mind?" Darkbolt laughed. Jake smirked.

"Looks like you need a wrestling lesson." 

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(Lounge)

"What's going to happen to us?" Angelica asked Althea.

"Well, you new guys are going to stay here." She replied. Longshot, Beast King, and Spyder leapt up in protest.

"No way, dude! The world's totally at stake, man! We should help!" Jack snapped.

"Yeah! We're all experienced with our powers!" Longshot exclaimed. "Jack here whooped the Hellions by himself!" 

"So did Thunderbolt. Twice." Althea said. Dazzler walked in. 

"Hey. I checked on the guys. They're okay. Pyro still has his statue up of you, Firestar." Ali Blaire grinned. Firestar groaned. 

"Remind me to _shoot him!_" 

"Thunderbird's screaming at the TV."

"**_C'MON FOLEY!!!!_****_ KILL HIM!!!!!!!_**" Thunderbird's roar could be heard all the way in the lounge. "**_WHOOO!!!!_****_ NOW THAT'S HOW YA WRESTLE!! YEAH!!!"_**

"Hoo brother." Ali groaned. "Pietro's **still** out, and everyone else is fine. Lina's only lightly injured." Wanda walked in. 

"You guys have got to see what Airtight cooked up this time! Jake's in Kyle's mind fighting Darkbolt!" The kids ran into the lab. 

"What's up?" Althea asked.

"Look at this." Recondo pointed at the screen. The screen showed Jake and Darkbolt in an aerial battle, firing lightning and flames at each other.

"Shouldn't they have help?" Althea asked. 

"I don't think we can. Most of the kids are either to exhausted right now or too injured to help." The new recruit mutants looked at each other.

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(Kyle's mind)

"RAAAAAAAGH!!!!!!" Jake got thrown into the ground hard. He then got a set of steel steps to the face. "AWWW!!!!!" Darkbolt laughed.

"I'm pretty powerful too, Lizard-breath!" Darkbolt laughed. Jake jumped to his feet quickly, feeling his body grow stronger. He snarled.

"You haven't gotten me down yet!" 

"Well, we'll see." Darkbolt smirked. Out of nowhere, a dagger grazed his arm. "AAGH!!!!" Longshot appeared on the turnbuckle, brandishing another dagger. 

"Next one goes through the arm, pal!" The Mojoworld native yelled. Darkbolt snarled. He prepped a ball of blue electricity.

"And this goes through your face!" He cocked back his arm, but a pair of heat beams hit his back. "AAAAAAAAGH!!!!!" Firestar swooped by. He then got his face scratched by a pair of talons. Beast King attacked as an eagle. "AAAGH!!!" The animorph got out of there before he could get hit by anything. Spyder helped free Kyle. She knew her electric webs against Darkbolt would be like throwing crumpled paper at a tank. Kyle slumped into her arms. 

"C'mon Thunderbolt…" She lightly slapped his face. "Wake up…" 

"You got friends, Red Dragon." Darkbolt sneered. "Still won't save you." Jake smirked. 

"We'll see, Blunderbolt. We'll see." 

Looks like business is picking up, as good ol' JR would say! Can Jake and the new recruits take Darkbolt out? What'll happen next? What is Cobra La up to now? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly! 


	21. Round Two!

GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!

To Sparky Genocide: Yeah, I doubt Kyle will apologize to Lina. He don't need to. Darkbolt pulled the assault, not Kyle. Oh, we'll see Serpentor III act weird. Trust me. 

To Red Witch: Read the new chapters of "Mutants on Film"! Loved 'em! Oh yeah, BTW, I got some books today and one is a collection of old X-Men comics! Yes! It has the one Thunderbird died in. That part sucked. Here's a fight for you!

To Aaron: Yep, it's the New Misfits and Red Dragon vs. Darkbolt! Wish 'em luck! I'm surprised Virus hasn't taken **those** steps as well with his insanity growing. Anyway, enjoy the new chapter! 

To Metal Dragon1: I do want to use the idea of a GI Joe all-animal unit soon. I can't wait for the next chapter! PUT IT UP QUICKLY!!!! Yeah, I feel for Roadblock, too. Here's an idea for ya: Why not find a way to have a big X-Men/Kid Razor team-up? That'd be sweet. And have Razor crack fun at some other heroes. He thinks of Mr. Fantastic as a nerd (Razor claims to have seen the Invisible Woman naked, which _really_ ticks him off), Spider-Man as a party animal, and he has a great respect for Wolverine. And have somebody slap Scott a lot! And Fusebox is not related to Sgt. Harold Polanski, the Cleveland cop Kid Razor _loves_ to torment.

To Wizard1: Read the new chapter of "Karaoke Dance Party"! Love it! BTW, you never reviewed my story "Omega Attack!" Read it! It's good! Yeah, the fight is going to be tough. I put so many out of action to help streamline the story a bit.

It's Profile Time again! *Crowd hoots, hollers, cheers, claps, and screams.* Thank you, thank you, thank you. Anyway, now we look at a Joe who always has a guitar solo playing in his soul, the one, the only, Rock 'n' Roll!

Rock 'n' Roll

Real Name: Craig S. McConnell

Rank: E-5 (Sergeant Major)

Affiliation: Army

Primary Military Specialty: Infantry, Machine Gunner

Secondary Military Specialty: PT Instructor

Birthplace: Malibu, California

Bio: Before joining the Army, Rock 'n' Roll grew up on the beaches of Malibu, a former surfer and bodybuilder. Needing a purpose in life, he joined the Army.

Rock 'n' Roll, as a sergeant, was one of the original thirteen soldiers that comprised GI Joe. He gained an expertise in gattling weaponry because of his love of loud noises. His favorite is heavy metal from England. He's also known for his quirky sense of humor.

When the Malibu Joes were formed to help counteract terrorist activity in the American West Coast, Rock 'n' Roll signed up happily because their headquarters was right near his hometown! A man who refuses to grow up, Rock 'n' Roll often is as immature as the Malibu Joes' mutant teenage charges, the West Coast Misfits. Despite this, he's in charge of armaments for Malibu Base. 

Chapter 21: Round Two!

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(The mind of Kyle Wildfire)

"Eat this!" Firestar fired a heat blast at Darkbolt, but he countered with a blue electric shield. He then used the shield to slam Firestar into the SmackDown set, knocking her cold.  

"Oh please." Darkbolt yawned. "You're starting to bore me AAGH!!!!" Jake slapped on a sleeper hold. Darkbolt countered with an electric flash in the dragon's eyes, causing him to roar, covering his blinded eyes. 

"AAAGH!!!! MY EYES!!!" 

"Hah! None can beat me!" The evil electrokinetic laughed arrogantly. "I can beat anyone!"

"C'mon Kyle, wake up…" Spyder laid Kyle on the ring and started shaking him. "Kyle, wake up…this is no time for napping…"

"Uhm, beat the jabroni…" Kyle mumbled. "Slap real hard…" 

"Hah!" Longshot threw several daggers. Darkbolt used a thunder whip to send 'em right back! "Yipe!" He cartwheeled back, and the daggers landed on the mat right in front of him. He then got punched hard by a big electric fist.

"KYLE, _WAKE UP!!_" Spyder slapped Kyle real hard. Kyle blinked.

"Who dares slap the mighty Thunderbolt? Ooh, my achin' head." Kyle mumbled before shaking his head, knocking all the cockroaches and cobwebs out. "Ugh. What hit the Thunderbolt? His head is _pounding!_  That's the last time he and Sunfire engage in a 'break-wooden-boards-with-your-head-contest'. Oooooooooh…" Darkbolt looked in horror. 

"**NO!**" He swatted Beast King out of the air, and out of his pterodactyl form. He dove towards Spyder. "_PREPARE TO FRY, YOU SPIDEY WANNA-BE!!!_" He flew into a hard slap in the face from Kyle. 

"You are one **_stupid_** jabroni!" Kyle sneered. "You think you can get one over on the Thunderbolt _twice?_" Kyle laughed. "The Thunderbolt's ready for you now, you wannabe." He looked at Spyder. "Remind the Thunderbolt to kick that jabroni in the groin really hard." He turned back to a recovering Darkbolt. "My turn!" Kyle threw Darkbolt into a turnbuckle and nailed the evil mutant with several Ric Flair-like chops. "Whoo! Whoo! Whoo! Whoo! You suck! Even _Kurt Angle_ doesn't suck as much as you now! And he _sucks!_" Darkbolt headbutted Kyle hard, making him grunt. 

"Oh yeah?" Darkbolt nailed Kyle with a clothesline. He smirked. "Heh. Too easy oof!" He got smashed into another turnbuckle by a bull. The bull changed into an octopus, which attached his tentacles to Darkbolt's head, rendering him unable to see. The evil mutant cursed in a loud muffled voice as he tried to pull Beast King off him. Darkbolt created a huge electrical shock, knocking Beast King off him, and unconscious. The animorph shifted back to human form as he slipped under. Spider fired an electric web, but Darkbolt merely absorbed the electricity. He took Spyder out with a thunder blast. 

"RAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Jake fired an inferno at Darkbolt.

"**_YIPE!!!!_**" Darkbolt created an electric forcefield to protect himself. However, Kyle raced through the field, carrying a steel chair. He smashed his evil counterpart from behind with it, knocking him out. The field dissipated. Kyle smiled up at his older brother. 

"Thanks for the outside distraction, bro. I feel like Eddie Guerrero: I lie, I cheat, I steal!" Kyle sneered at Darkbolt. "Time for you to go!" Kyle created a cannon out of electricity, pointing straight up. He stuffed Darkbolt in it, and grabbed the string. "This trip'll be a real _blast_ for ya, jabroni! Ha HA!!" Kyle pulled, and with a BOOM, Darkbolt was sent flying.

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(Airtight's Lab)

"What the--?" Airtight and the Joes leaned in. Darkbolt's body began to convulse, and suddenly, in an explosion of electricity accompanied by the boom of thunder, a blast of electricity shot upwards, through the roof, and out of sight.

"Whoa." Hi-Tech blinked. The door of the machine Kyle was hooked up to opened, and Red Dragon walked out, carrying the knocked-out new Misfits over his shoulders. He gently placed them down on the ground before he transformed back into his human form. 

"We did it, Airtight." Jake reported with a grin. "Kyle himself nailed the final blow."

"Aw man, what a weird dream." Kyle moaned, holding his head as he sat up. "That's the last time the Thunderbolt reads all his Captain Nebula comic books and graphic novels before he goes to bed. The **very** last time." 

Well, now one problem is dealt with! What happened to Darkbolt? What about the Cobras? What are they up to and why do they need the BET? What'll happen to Roadblock and Cobra Commander? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!      


	22. ReAcquaintance!

GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!

To Metal Dragon1: Can't wait for the new chapter! 

To Sparky Genocide: Yeah, Jake's reaction to Carmella will be interesting. I'll try to put some Cobra humor in and hopefully, more Kyle arguments. 

To Descendant: Read the new chapter of Brotherhood Evolution! Love it! It was great! 

To Red Witch: Read the new chapters of "Mutants on Film!" Loved 'em! Here's some more madness for you!

To Wizard1: Yeah, Kyle and Toshi do sometimes do weird contests. Can't wait to see Chapter 5 of "Karaoke Dance Party"! What'll Craig be up to? 

**Sorry I'm late, folks! My home PC is suffering problems due to an upgrade gone bad, and I had to type from my laptop, and I can't get onto the internet on it until I'm near campus. Sorry! Anyway, I got some better news: I GOT OVER 100 REVIEWS FOR THE FIRST TIME!!!!! WHOO-HOOO!!!!!!!!**

It's Profile Time Again! *Crowd hoots, hollers, cheers, claps, and chants* This time, we look at one of the newer members of the West Coast Misfit team, Chilljaw!

Chilljaw

Real Name: Thomas Sharpe (Commonly called Tommy)

Class: Mutant

Allegiance: Misfits (West Coast Team)

Powers: Chilljaw's mutation makes him appear to be half-man, half-shark. He has gray skin, gills, sharp front teeth, and even a fin growing out of his upper back! Chilljaw has superhuman strength and is resistant to injury. His dual respiratory systems allow him to breathe on land or in water. His senses are enhanced for underwater travel, especially scent (He can identify people by the scent of their blood). His body can somehow store water and cool it to a point where it freezes whatever it touches. He can spit this "ice water" at distances up to 200 yards (He has learned how to create simple structures with his 'ice water', like platforms and loop-de-loops). 

Birthplace: Somewhere near the Great Barrier Reef, Australia.

Bio: The 2nd mutant of Australian blood to join the Misfits, Chilljaw is ¼ Maori on his mother's side. He is the son of renowned shark experts Garrett and Frida Sharpe. Unlike a lot of parents who find themselves with physically-mutated children, the Sharpes accepted Chilljaw. They thought it was funny that they as devotees of sharks would end up with a son that was part-shark. 

  
At the age of ten, The Sharpes emigrated from Australia to America, where they got jobs at a marine institute in Malibu, California. There, Tommy was considered an odd-looking, but cool kid (Malibu, California and Cleveland, Ohio are two very mutant-friendly cities). At the age of 14, Chilljaw's mutant powers emerged when he suddenly got the chills. He spat out a stream of water that froze a plant when it hit it. 

In America, Chilljaw became a local skateboarding hero. When he heard of the West Coast Misfits, he sought them out. He met West Coast Misfit leader Theresa Rourke, codenamed Siryn, at Nick's Arcade, a local teen hangout. He asked her if she would give him a shot at membership in the GI Joe-trained mutant team. Then, he was known as Shark Man.

Chilljaw's first mission with the team was to stop the alien biker gang known as the Crushers. During this mission, the West Coast Misfits met (and battled) the Imperial Guard of the Shi'ar Empire. Chilljaw used his ice water to single-handedly capture the Crushers by freezing them solid in a block of ice. He proved himself and he was allowed on the team.

Recently, he changed his codename from Shark Man to Chilljaw.

Chapter 22: Re-Acquaintance!

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(The snowy Alps, just outside of Cobra La)

The GI Joe codenamed Roadblock trudged through the snow, freezing and handicapped. During an attempt to escape capture in Cobra La, the Joe cook was blinded. Coiled around his body was a half-man, half-snake creature that was beginning to look more and more like a snake every second. The creature was once the ruthless yet incompetent terrorist leader known only as Cobra Commander. Cobra Commander was slowly transforming into a snake thanks to the evil Golobulus. The alien man-monster had used the Commander as a demonstration of his ultimate weapon against humanity: Spores that will alter the genetic code of all humanity into snakes. 

"I was once a man…" The mutated Commander whined. "A man…A _maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnnnn_…I cannot believe I'm going to be turned into a snake…What a way for me, the great Cobra Commander, to go!" The mutating madman sighed. "What'll happen to my organization? Oh, there is so much I haven't done yet! I haven't conquered the world…"

_Like **that** would ever happen anyway._ Roadblock grumbled sarcastically.

"I never captured the Hulk…"

_Some people should **never** be messed with. The Hulk is one of them._ Roadblock was trying his best not to lose it.

"I never got to kill the surviving members of Led Zeppelin…"

_Wildstar__ would **kill** you if he heard that._

"I was once a man, a man who could take the world by its throat and choke it until it turned blue and passed out."

_I'm begging to wonder who is more psychotic, you, Pyro, or Virus?_

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(The base) 

Carmella Unuscione sat on the roof of a building. She never was a social person. Well, she would be _very_ social if social meant beating up anybody that came within reach any time you felt like it and enjoying it. 

"Well Carmella. Long time no see." A familiar Boston accent said. Carmella turned around and saw the one and only Jake Wildfire. Carmella growled. As a girl, Carmella liked to intimidate and bully around other kids. However, Jake was never intimidated by her, and he always stood up to her for the other kids. 

"What do you want, Wildfire?" Carmella snarled. Jake smirked. 

_Same ol' Carmella.__ Always playing the tough chick. Some things never change._ Jake mentally chuckled at Carmella's reaction. It was just like he remembered her. "Just want to catch up, Carmella. One wrestler's kid to another wrestler's kid."

"Our families have fought each other in the wrestling ring for years, Wildfire." Carmella smirked. "Our fathers fought each other all the time in the ring. I enjoyed running your brother into the ground at the Slaughterhouse. Just like old times."

"We didn't live in New York long, Carmy. Just for a year or so." Jake reminded. Carmella growled. She _hated_ being called 'Carmy', especially by a Wildfire. She activated her forcefield.

"I **_hate_** being called 'Carmy'!" She struck at Jake with her shielded fist, but the third-generation wrestler ducked. He then knocked Carmella on her butt with his flame breath. "Oof!" 

"**That** was for my brother." Jake said simply. "He's had a rough day. He wasn't himself today." He added the word "Literally" under his breath. "Nice to see you again." He turned and looked at her. "I heard your father is in jail because of Magneto."

"That $%&#% set my father up!" Carmella roared. "I joined the Renegades to hopefully get my hands on him!" 

"Well, good luck to you." Jake said. Carmella glared at Red Dragon as he walked away.

_Someday, Jake Wildfire.__ Someday, I will beat you and I **will** prove the greatness of the Unusciones! My father has beaten your father and I **can** beat you! But first, I have another goal: I will break every single tiny bone in that coward Magneto's body! I'll make him pay!_

Well, that was interesting! What'll happen next? Will the Joes find Roadblock? Will Carmella ever be able to beat Jake in combat? Will she be able to get Magneto? How is Kyle? Will Cobra Commander ever stop whining? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!

        


	23. Another Intermission

GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!

To Red Witch: Read the new chapters of "Mutants on Film" and loved 'em! Man, the X-Men can't get a break, huh? Hey, maybe have Kelly get a hit placed on him by a horse! That'd be funny!

To Sparky Genocide: Gilgacon playing around, huh? Sounds cool. I'll see. Great ideas!

To Aaron: Well, let's find out what happens now, shall we?

To Wizard1: WHEN IS CHAPTER FIVE COMING UP?!?!

To Metal Dragon1: Read the new Chapter and loved it! So, when'll Kid Razor appear again? I can't wait for the Kid Razor/New Mutants team-up? _PLEASE_ have Razor crack some jokes about the New Mutants! It'd be great! Yeah Carmella _may_ have a crush on Jake. May have.

**Disclaimer: I OWN NOTHING EXCEPT WHAT I CREATE!!!!!!!**

It's Profile Time Again! *Crowd hoots, hollers, cheers, claps, chants, and screams* This time, due to the fact that I cannot access my PC at home due to upgrade problems, we look at a new recruit to the Joe team, Burner!

Burner

Real Name: Eric Suarez

Affiliation: Marines

Rank: Sergeant First Class

Primary Military Specialty: Flamethrower, Incendiary Weapons Specialist

Secondary Military Specialty: Infantry

Birthplace: Dallas, Texas

Bio: Burner is a proud Texan, and a big Cowboys fan. He has their blue star logo tattooed on his shoulder. 

He was born to Mexican-American parents, and he is bilingual, speaking both Spanish and English. His life changed forever when at the age of eight, he witnessed a neighbor's house burn down. Since then, he developed a secret fascination with the primal power of flame.  

Burner is a second-generation Marine, following in the footsteps of his father, Colonel Ramon Suarez (now retired). His younger brother Garrett is a private now serving in Italy. At the age of 18, Burner signed up with the Marines, where he took up studies in incendiary weaponry. Considered one of their best, the USMC gladly recommended him to the GI Joe team. He is right now undergoing basic training. If Burner makes it, he'll be the first Suarez in the team, and Burner hopes to not be the last of his family on the team. 

**Author's Note: I recently picked up the graphic novel "The Return of Superman", and I do want to sometime in the future, do a fic that is set in the future Misfitverse (In essence, the Misfits would be adults) based on it. In fact, I can imagine a certain psychotic mutant Dreadnok playing a part similar to the Cyborg Superman…**

Chapter 23: Another Intermission…

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(A Lounge)

"So that's what happened, huh?" Kyle sighed. He and Jake sat across from each other, and they were sipping hot chocolate. "First you had Draconis, and now I got Darkbolt. Man, the Thunderbolt's head feels like all of Evolution smashed it repeatedly with chairs." 

"**_WHOOOOOOOOOOO YEAH!!!!_****_ ALRIGHT!!!!! YEAH!!!!! HIT HIM, FOLEY!!!! HIT HIM AGAIN!!!!!_**" The voice of John Proudstar was heard from the infirmary. Evidently, he wasn't complaining too much about his hospital stay. "**_C'MON MICK!!!!_****_ GO CACTUS JACK ON HIM!!!!! YEAH!!! NOW THAT'S HOW WRESTLING SHOULD BE DONE!!!! HIT HIM AGAIN!!!! USE THE CHAIN!!! CHOKE HIM WITH THE CHAIN!!!!_**"

"Man, someone should tell Thunderbird how loud he is." Jake grumbled. "Anyway, yeah. That's it. You have your **own** dark half running around now."

"I don't get it. Why us, man? Did our family do something really bad?" Kyle sipped his drink. "We get these awesome powers, only for somehow, those powers create evil personas that try to kill us."

"Like we were destined to be evil or something." Jake sighed. 

"No kidding." Kyle agreed. He then burst out laughing. "Man, those jabronies Lance and Rahne owe the Thunderbolt the mother of all apologies for this, then!"

"They didn't know, Kyle. Relax." Jake groaned. "Just let it go. It wasn't their fault."

"Whatever." Kyle got up. "The Thunderbolt plans to go throw some excess voltage at some of those fling thingies. Or engage in another argument with Toshiro." Jake watched his brother walk off with a grin on his face. He watched as Rahne passed by.

"Look, uhm, Kyle. We had no idea that it was that Darkbolt character in your body. He did do a convincing job portraying you. Ye had to admit that." Rahne chuckled. Kyle shot the Scottish mutant a look.

"You're telling the Thunderbolt that you couldn't tell the difference between the People's Champion and some half-Dr. Evil, half-Doomsday doppelganger with the brains of a gorilla that just got slapped?" Kyle groaned. "Technically, the Thunderbolt should slap those Scottish accent right out of you. However, the Thunderbolt wants to go to bed, so he's leaving." Kyle yawned as he walked away. "Oh and by the way, the Thunderbolt forgives ya, even though you were being a dumb jabroni." Rahne smiled and shook her head. Oh, Kyle.

"Oh, brother." Jake groaned. "Only you, Kyle." He then smiled. "Good to have you back." He sipped his soda.

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(The snowy Alps, outside Cobra La)

"There he is! Roadblock!" Flint called. Roadblock was strangling the mutating Cobra Commander. Quite a feat for a blinded man. The Commander now looked almost completely transformed into a snake.

"Flint?"

"And Lifeline and Iceberg are with me." Flint replied. Lifeline ran over to Roadblock and placed his hands on his head. The medic's healing energies repaired the cook's damaged eyes and everything came into focus. "Are you alright?" 

"Fine now. The Commander?" Roadblock replied.

"I'm sorry. I don't think I can reverse the process." Lifeline sighed sadly as he watched the Commander slither around.

"Aw man. Now what?" Flint asked.

"Aw no! Great time for the friggin radio to be shot." Iceberg grumbled. "I'm asking that new guy Hi-Tech to fix it when we get back. They said he has some weird psychic power over machines. Hey!" The Arctic trooper nearly got his head blown off. "Who threw that?!" 

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(Cobra La)

"Activate the device." Golobulus grinned evilly. Virus looked at the BET, than at Golobulus.

"Mate, I have to ask you." Virus said. "You see, I love one of the Misfits. Althea Delgado."

"Ahh, the water witch." Golobulus responded. Virus struggled to keep his temper in check.

"She and I were in love, until the Toad cast a spell on her and made her love him." Virus started to tear up. "Golobulus, don't hurt Althea. I have a way of freeing her from the spell so we can be happy again." The nerdy Dreadnok begged. "I'd _die_ if anything happened to her. You can mutate Toad into a frog monster for all I care. I love Althea, and I don't want anything to happen to her." Golobulus smirked.

"Virus, when Cobra La retakes our rightful planet, I shall make you a king. And this Althea shall be your queen." The Cobra La ruler promised. With a smile, Virus turned on the device. The fact that he was condemning his fellow mammals seemed to not bother him in the slightest. _Delusional fool.__ His mental disease is slowly robbing him of his humanity. Yes, I can imagine him, no I can practically **see** him one day doing great acts of atrocity for this supposed love of Althea._ The device glowed. And the Broadcast Energy Transmitter's main dish fired a rainbow beam of energy into the air.

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(GI Joe base, Communications Room)

"Holy cow!" Dial-Tone's eyes widened at his monitor. "Dial-Up! Did you pick that up?!"

"Yeah." The Japanese Joe replied. "Dial-Up to Hawk. Better get in here. We just detected a huge energy flux coming from the Himalayas!" 

"The Himalayas?" Dial-Tone's brow furrowed. "Cobra." Dial-Up nodded. Hawk and Falcon ran into the room.

"Where?" Falcon asked. 

'The Himalayan Mountains." Dial-Up replied. "I believe here we may be able to figure out where Cobra got those weird bio-weapons."

"I want a piece of them! Thanks to Serpentor, my brother might die!" Falcon growled.

"Easy Falcon. You stay and help the Rawhides guard the base. They got four inexperienced mutants and four Joes that are most definitely not ready to handle Cobra La." Hawk ordered. Longshot overheard.

_That's what **they** think._ The Mojoworld native thought. _I'd better tell the others._

Hoo boy! Looks like Cobra's gonna get it now! Can the Joes stop Cobra? What'll the Rawhides do? Can Flint and the other captured Joes be rescued? Will Virus become a madman? Will Cobra Commander become human again? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!  


	24. Another Battle!

GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!

To Red Witch: Yeah, that was. I read your new stuff. Love it, although Bulldog is none too happy with the new story. I'm trying to stop him from booking a flight to Transylvania!

To Wizard1: Yeah, I do want to do something like that, but it's going to be tough fixing up the plot, considering most of it revolved around the re-birth of Superman. However, I could imagine Virus destroying an entire city just to get his hands on Todd. Any thoughts? Well, in the movie, the Rawhides helped a lot so we'll see. And Kyle is back to his crazy loudmouthed self.

To Sparky Genocide: I don't think Virus will _ever_ get the hint. His delusions are the cornerstone of his psyche, his very _self_ at this point. He only lives to win Althea's heart. 

To Metal Dragon1: Yeah, Kyle will _always_ have a big mouth. BTW, Animeluvr1 plans to have Kid Razor and the Rock 'n' Roll Cavaliers make an appearance in "Bittersweet" soon!

It's Profile Time Again! WHOOOO!!!! *Crowd hoot, hollers, cheers, claps, screams, and chants* Anyway, we now look at the most famous member of the Joe team, everyone's favorite ninja, the original, Snake-Eyes!

Snake-Eyes

Real Name: Classified

Affiliation: Army

Rank: Master Sergeant

Primary Military Specialty: Infantry

Secondary Military Specialty: Hand-to-Hand Combat Instructor

Birthplace: Classified

Bio: Out of all the Joes, Snake-Eyes has the longest past, yet is the most mysterious. He constantly keeps his face covered, and he never speaks. He seems almost like a human shadow.  

Snake-Eyes is skilled in 12 martial arts, including karate, kung-fu, and jujitsu. He is also expertly skilled in edged weapons.

It is known that Snake-Eyes grew up somewhere in the US, and had served in the military before GI Joe, being trained in mountaineering, underwater demolitions, as well as survival techniques for jungles, deserts, and the Arctic. He also knows some holistic medicine. He served alongside future Joes Lonzo Wilkinson and Thomas Arashikage, codenames Stalker and Storm Shadow. 

After returning home, he learned his parents and his beloved twin sister Terri were killed in a car accident on the way to meet him. Devastated, he traveled the world until he reached Japan. There, he re-met Storm Shadow, who let him train with his family. During this time, the Hard Master of the clan was assassinated, and Snake-Eyes fled the clan shake-up.

He moved to a cabin in the High Sierras, and took in a wolf named Timber. When GI Joe was organized, Hawk and Stalker recommended Snake-Eyes, and he accepted the spot. In the team, he developed feelings for Scarlett. In an early mission, Snake-Eyes rescued Scarlett from helicopter wreckage. A window exploded in his face, scarring it and damaging his vocal chords. As a result, Snake-Eyes lost the ability to speak and more a mask to cover his disfigured face.

Snake-Eyes continues to serve today, although Scarlett's spell over him and first sergeant Duke have caused tensions between the two Joes.

Chapter 24: Another Battle! 

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(Cobra La)

The Joes and the Misfits charged in, ready for battle.

"Let's stop Cobra La once and for all! YO JOE!!!" Hawk yelled. 

"YO JOE!!!" The planes streaked in the skies, and the tanks drove into the ground. 

"Alright, Misfits! Let's finish this!" Althea yelled.

"The Thunderbolt says, let's beat some jabronies!" Kyle charged some Cobra-La guards. "Slappin' time!" He proceeded to slap guards left and right.

"Man, and Proudstar _likes_ that guy's style hey!" Velocity found himself being snared by a vine. "Whoa guys! These things are alive!"

"The vines are all trying to stop us. The plant and animal life is fighting us!" Hawk exclaimed.

"Misfits, use your powers to help us!" 

"Right!" The kids went to work protecting the tanks and planes as the Joes fought Cobra-La's forces. However, one Misfit was having the best advantage: Sunfire. The Solar Samurai's mutant abilities allowed him to rain solar flames on the plant life, incinerating it. 

"Goodbye!" Jake punched out Leathersuit.

"Ew! Keep your hands off me, you pervert!" Althea smashed Virus's jaw with her bo staff. She then used a wave to knock down several Cobra-La guards. 

"Let there be rock!" Lance shook up the ground, creating a fissure that swallowed a couple of the large maggot-like tanks. 

"I found 'em!" Shipwreck exclaimed. He was accompanied by the previously captured Joes. Kicker ran to Quick-Kick and hugged him hard. 

"You featherhead! You really got me worried!" She smiled, impersonating Moe Howard.

"Okay girls, as ol' Proudstar would say, we got a fight on your hands! Let's go!" Gunbarrel cocked his rifle. "We got terrorists to foil!" 

"Look out!" Kicker screamed. Sunfire fell into a branch. 

"Too much…overpowered me…" The Japanese mutant moaned. Two figures swooped down.

"Oh no! Gilgacon and Nemesis Enforcer!" Siryn exclaimed.

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(The GI Joe base)

"Man, I want action!" Burner grumbled. 

"You and me both." Hi-Tech agreed. He and the other new Joes were standing in the cafeteria. Alongside the new Misfits, the new Joes were supposed to stay behind. Falcon was with them, but he was somewhere else on the base to think. Thunderbolt had went along with his fellow West Coast Misfits. He was verbally berating them the whole time for not being able to tell the difference between him and Darkbolt. 

"You aren't the only ones who are _totally_ bored, dudes." Beast King, Firestar, Longshot, and Spyder walked in.

"We can help! We just need to prove it!" Angelica added. 

"Someone's got to stay behind and care for the wounded Misfits and Joes." Vorona said simply. Thunderbird could still be heard screaming at the TV.

"**_KILL HIM, FOLEY!!!! KILL HIM!!!!!_**"

"**_PROUDSTAR, SHUT UP!!!!!!_**" 

"And I'm getting sick and tired of hearing Pyro sing around me! I had to beat him with a pipe to shut that psycho up!" Angelica groaned.

"I think you may have made him crazier, Angie." Longshot rolled his eyes.

"I don't think Pyro's brains can be any more scrambled than they are now." Spyder quipped.

"I wasn't asked to join this unit out of dumb luck!" Mayday grumbled. "GI Joe consists of the best of the best soldiers! I want to prove I earned this spot!" 

"Why not do what the Misfits or Bree would do? Swipe a helicopter." Hi-Tech offered. The other Rawhides looked at the young sergeant.

"Alright." The others agreed.

"Let's do it." Jack grinned.

"Get Falcon. We'll need a commander." Spyder said.

Well, now things are heating up! What'll happen next? Can the Joes and the Misfit teams defeat Cobra La? Will the New Recruits join the battle? Will any insanity happen? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!


	25. Rawhide Rescue!

GI Joe, the Movie: Evo-tized!

To Red Witch: Here's more madness for you! Enjoy!

To Sparky Genocide: Yep, Virus got his butt smashed by Wavedancer _again!_ Well, the Rawhides _did_ manage to get in the action in the original movie.

To Aaron: Oh yeah, the combined Misfits/GI Joe versus Cobra La's forces. This is going to be a slobberknocker, alright! And the Misfits have to take on Nemesis Enforcer and Gilgacon. Hoo boy. Here's some more madness for you! Enjoy!

To Wizard1: Here's more insanity for you! YEAH!!!!

It's Profile Time Again! *Crowd hoots, hollers, cheers, claps, screams, and chants* This time, we take another look at one of the original members of the West Coast Misfit team, the world's first and only rockin' feral, the wonderous Wildstar!

Wildstar

Real Name: Ace Starr

Allegiance: Misfits (West Coast Team), faked membership in the Hellions

Hair: Brown with black tips, in the style of a lion's mane.

Eyes: Chocolate Brown

Class: Mutant

Powers: Ace Starr's mutation gives him the characteristics of the King of Beasts, the lion. Ace's body is very sleek and cat-like. He also has fangs and claws. Over his right eye, he has a birthmark of a blue eight-pointed star. He has enhanced senses, strength, speed, agility, and reflexes. He also can fire blue energy beams from his claws. Ace also possesses a healing factor that is as strong as the ones belonging to Wolverine and his "daughter", fellow West Coast Misfit X23. If Ace falls from high places, he'll land on his feet thanks to a cat-like instinct of his.

Birthplace: Los Angeles, California

Bio: Ace Starr's father is a stockbroker and his mother is a homemaker. However, at the time Ace was born, Ronnie Starr was a roadie, and Cathy Starr was a groupie! Ace was conceived in a Van Halen tour and born during a Kiss tour! Until the age of seven, Ace grew up in a rock 'n' roll world. At seven, Ace and family settled down in LA. During this time, Ace met his friends Mandy Randall, Randy Chang, Micky Alexander, and Eddie Ulrich. Together, the fivesome formed local rock band the Ballroom Blitzers, a band known for playing originals as well as covering 70s and 80s classic rock. 

As a kid, Ace starred in several commercials. His claw beams and other special powers emerged during a fight with a schoolyard bully. As a teenager, Ace was recruited by S.H.I.E.L.D director Nick Fury to go undercover and infiltrate the Hellions, a team of teenage mutants trained to serve the Hellfire Club by its White Queen, real name Emma Frost. As a Hellion, Ace helped fellow teammate Jake Wildfire, now-codenamed Red Dragon, exorcise his dark side come to life: Draconis, the Black Dragon. During that battle, Ace met future teammate X23, a genetically-modified clone of the X-Man Wolverine. Afterwards, Ace took X23 in, giving her the name Athena. 

After that, Ace traveled the world for a while, looking for adventure, and he wasn't disappointed. In Japan, he teamed up with Sunfire to fight a cyber-ninja. In his hometown, he befriended the singer known as the Dazzler and helped the Farrah-haired girl save a teenager/college student hangout. In Arizona, he teamed up with an Apache mutant named John Proudstar to save the Camp Verde reservation from a genetically-modified bear. In Boston, he met Red Dragon's younger brother Kyle, who became Thunderbolt.

During a visit to the X-Mansion, Ace, the Misfits, the X-Men, and the Avengers were attacked by a bio-droid known as the Mimic. Ace gathered up the allies he met in his travels, alongside a Compton native named Terrell Mason, a speedster codenamed Velocity. Together with Siryn, X23, and former X-Man Wolfsbane, Wildstar, Dazzler, Thunderbird, Velocity, Thunderbolt, and Sunfire defeated the Mimic. After that, Ace suggested a new team be formed, and the West Coast Misfits were formed.

Ace still serves on the team today, even though the team has expanded to include Rictor, Chilljaw, and recently, Longshot and Beast King.

Note: Ace Starr is the cousin of East Coast Misfit members Paul and Craig Starr, codename Starchild and Darkstar. His charms are very powerful, netting the hearts of the Hellions M, Catseye, Tarot, and Roulette, as well as the X-Man Husk. 

Chapter 25: Rawhide Rescue!

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(GI Joe base)

"Here's one!" The Rawhides ran into a helicopter. 

"Hey!" One of the Greenshirts tried to stop the helicopter as it took off.

"Sorry dude!" Jack turned into a woodpecker and strafed the Greenshirt. _Just like that Monet chick!_

"AHHH!!" The Greenshirt fell on his butt. He was unhurt, except for a bruised ego.

"Let's fly! Yo Joe!" Hi-Tech said.

"Hi-Tech, you can't fly!" Vorona blinked. Hi-Tech turned with a smirk, and his eyes were glowing electronic green. "No offense, Hi-Tech. I know you're using your powers to interact with the helicopter, but maybe I should help. I am licensed." She took the navigator's seat. "Beast King! Firestar! Flank us!" Firestar flew to the left of the copter, and Beast King flew to the right, as a bird known as a swift. Nobody tried to Falcon. He was too busy plotting ways to torture Serpentor III

_Then I'll dip that mother&$%#@^ in scalding oil…Or maybe I should lock him a room with Trinity…Yeah, that'll work. I'll beat the snot out of that mix-and-match clone, then leave him with Trinity! Then when **they're** done with him, I'll break every bone in his body one by one. I'll get that little son of a…_ Falcon muttered under his breath.

"Man, I'll never get used to that." Burner shook his head as he saw Beast King transform.

"Why?" Mayday smirked. "And remember, you're talking to a fellow mutant." 

"Ever seen 'American Werewolf in Paris'?" Burner asked. The mutant sniper nodded. "Saw it when I was six. Ever since then, I've been creeped out by things that turn into animals. That's why I get nervous around that nice Scottish girl. Even worse for me is that she can turn into a wolf." 

"She doesn't become a rampaging monster, Burner." Mayday laughed. "She's exactly the same as a wolf as she is as a human, except she's more aggressive and can't talk." Burner nodded.

"I understand, but she still creeps me out." Burner shivered. "So does the surfing animorph over there. Not to mention the fact I'm slightly afraid of flying." 

"Relax." Longshot smiled at the Hispanic flamethrower. "Besides superhuman agility, I can create good luck. If we get shot down, I can increase the chances of us making it out OK." 

"Kid, remind me to tell Ace to take you to Vegas with him." Vorona laughed. "He'd break the bank ten times over with you around!" 

"Oh ha ha." Longshot rolled his eyes.

"Aren't you a little young to be here, Spyder?" Mayday asked the gray-skinned pre-teen. Spyder shrugged. 

"Hey, I wanted to help. I want to be just like Spider-Man! He always swings in on his webs and saves the day!" Spyder grinned. 

"Hey look!" Firestar pointed downwards. She saw the waving Flint, Lifeline, Iceberg, and Roadblock. "The guys!" The helicopter landed near the guys.

"Are you all alright?" Falcon asked the Joes.

"We're fine." Lifeline sighed, holding the snake-like Cobra Commander. "This snake was Cobra Commander. Hard to believe."

"The BET was fired." Falcon said simply. "It fired an intense energy beam into the sky."

"Spoooooooresssss…" Cobra Commander hissed. "Ssssssssporesssss…make me like thisssss…BET mature ssssssporessssss…" 

"Oh my God! If this spore thing is true…" Iceberg gulped.

"Then we got no time to lose! The others are in huge trouble!" Falcon nodded. "Let's go!" _Serpentor__, you're mine!_ He mentally vowed.

Well then, things are about to heat up! What'll happen next? Can the Rawhides turn the tide? Will Cobra Commander be restored to normal? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!    


	26. Fights! Fights! Fights!

GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!

To Red Witch: Well, here's some more fun, explosions, and insanity! Enjoy! By the way, I read the new story! I love it!

To Sparky Genocide: Well, the Commander _will_ be human again, thanks to someone you didn't expect. I really do believe that when he returns, he's going to slap some of his accomplices around for a while. (Cobra Commander: You hear that, you jerks?! I SHALL RETURN!!!!)

To Wizard1: Where are you?! 

It's Profile Time Again! *Crowd hoots, hollers, cheers, claps, chants, and screams* This time, we look at a member of the Cobra squad. He's the resident insane nerd of Cobra, Dr. Mindbender

Dr. Mindbender

Real Name: Unknown

Cobra Scientist and Mind Control Specialist 

Birthplace: Unknown (possibly somewhere in Europe)

Bio: Not much is known about the past of Dr. Mindbender, but there are many rumors regarding it. The generally accepted story is that he was a kind and honest orthodontist who had been experimenting with brainwave stimulation as a way to relieve pain. 

When one of his experiments went awry, Mindbender's mind was well, bent, and he was transformed into a vain and amoral person. Now believing he was free from society's rules, Mindbender continued his experiments, often going into areas and techniques other scientists found disgusting. This reputation got him recruited into Cobra.

In Cobra, Mindbender created the Battle Android Troopers (Later modified by the mutant Dreadnok known as Virus). Shortly after that, he started work on his most ambitious project ever: The creation of a perfect warrior to ensure Cobra's success. Using the DNA of such historical figures as Napoleon, Alexander the Great, and Julius Caesar, the mad doctor created Serpentor. Through some unknown means, Serpentor gained all the memories of the historical leaders his DNA was made from. Serpentor proved to be not just a fantastic warrior, but also a brilliant tactician and charismatic leader. Despite this, GI Joe destroyed him.

Mindbender tried again, this time behind the Commander's back, and enlisting the Dreadnoks to help him get the DNA. They got it, but they also got DNA from such figures as Marilyn Monroe and Ed Wood, causing Serpentor II to become a drag performer!  
  


Mindbender's other most famous creation is the future Misfit known as Xi. Mindbender created XI as part of a unit of half-man, half-snake creatures intended to be assassins. Xi, who got his name from the Roman numerals for eleven (Xi was the eleventh in his unit), was the only survivor and ended up in the care of GI Joe.

Mindbender still works for Cobra. The egocentric Mindbender is often at odds with the arrogant Virus. Even though Mindbender works mainly in genetics, and Virus's specialty is electronics/mechanics, their egomania causes them to argue constantly.   

Chapter 26: Fights! Fights! Fights!

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(The Alps, outside Cobra-La)

"We should get going! Who knows what's happening to the other guys!" Longshot said. 

"Agreed." Falcon nodded. "Let's go! Firestar, Beast King! You two know where that energy blast came from?"

"Yeah." The two mutants nodded.

"Then scout ahead and find out where it's-"

"Wait, Falcon!" Mayday pointed at a tunnel. "My infra-red vision found this tunnel!" Falcon nodded.

"Okay." 

"Well then, let's use it to sneak in!" Burner groaned.

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(Cobra La)

"YAHHHHH!!!!!!!!" Sgt. Slaughter and Carmella Unuscione engaged Nemesis Enforcer in battle. The genetically-created warrior tried to punch out the Sarge, but he was knocked backwards by a forcefield-covered Carmella.

"I'm a member of the great Unuscione family of wrestling, pal!" Carmella snarled. "Fighting is in my blood!" Nemesis Enforcer snarled. With a screech, the winged creature charged, but Carmella swatted him off. 

"Help the others, Unuscione!" Sarge ordered. "I got this guy." Carmella blinked.

"No offense Sarge, but he's real tough." 

"I'm tougher, kid." Sarge smirked. Carmella sighed.

"Those Misfits are a bunch of costumed clowns!" Carmella grumbled. Despite this, she obeyed Sarge's orders, and went to help the other kids. Sarge smirked at Nemesis Enforcer.

"Let's dance, big man." Meanwhile, the Misfits were trying to fight Gilgacon.

"HA!!" Red Dragon and Gilgacon started trading blows. 

"Me smash you!" Gilgacon puched Jake, but the dragon only smirked. 

"Learn to talk right, pal. Then _maybe_ you may be able to beat me." Jake threw Gilgacon through a wall. He then helped up his beaten comrades. "That won't keep him down for long, knowing my powers." Carmella raced up to Jake. 

"What happened here?" She wondered.

"A big moron called Gilgacon." Jake grumbled. "Help the others. I'm going to take down Gilgacon." Jake leapt into the hole he created with Gilgacon's help. Carmella grumbled. 

"Serpentor!" A familiar voice roared. Serpentor turned around and found himself on the receiving end of a sneak attack by Falcon. Firestar created a ring of flames around the two combatants before helping the Joes. _Thank you, Firestar._ Falcon glared at Serpentor III. "Because of you, my brother's in a coma, and he may die." Serpentor III smirked. 

"The funny part is, I was aiming for you." Serpentor smirked. Falcon glared at Serpentor.

"You're mine now, Serpent Breath." Falcon punched Serpentor hard, causing him to stagger. With great speed, the tyrant unsheathed his snake spear. Falcon's eyes widened.

"Remember this hey!" Serpentor III dropped the spear as the snake Cobra Commander attacked him. "Get off me!" Falcon eyed the flying chariot that Serpentor used as his personal transport. Falcon glared at Serpentor III, then jumped on the transport and flew off. _Now to find the BET._ Meanwhile Serpentor III threw the mutated Cobra Commander off him. The Commander slithered away, and he disappeared like he was being teleported away. 

Well, things are really heating up now! Can Falcon shut off the BET? Can the Joes stop Golobulus's plan? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly! 


	27. Final Victory!

GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!

To Red Witch: Well, here's the new chapter for you! Enjoy, and I hope it was as good as the last!

**Author's Note: Hi folks! Okay, you're going to see a fight between Falcon and Golobulus. I'm going to take some liberties with Golobulus's powers because I don't remember at all how it went in the movie.**

Chapter 27: Final Victory!

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(Cobra La)

Lieutenant Vincent R. Falcone, the GI Joe codenamed Falcon, hijacked the flying chariot that Serpentor III used as his personal transport. He rode the chariot into the room containing the BET. Guarding the BET was the leader of Cobra La himself, Golobulus. Falcon snarled as he stopped the chariot and leapt off. 

"Who are you?" He snarled.

"I am Golobulus. Leader of Cobra La. You cannot stop us, Falcon. We will reclaim our planet."

"Your time has passed, Golobulus." Falcon glared.

"You can't defeat me, Falcon. No human can. You humans are filth. A blight on the Earth. The Earth never needed you nor wanted you." Golobulus's red seashell-shaped eyepatch flipped open, revealing a pink glowing eye, similar to Cyclops's eyes. "You see, I have power." He fired a pink laser from his eye, and Falcon found himself running for his life. Meanwhile, Sergeant Slaughter was beating the snot out of Nemesis Enforcer. 

"HA!!!!!" Sarge took down the warrior with a mighty Scoop Slam. "This one's for Duke!" He smashed his fists hard against Nemesis Enforcer again. "And this one's for me!" He smashed Nemesis Enforcer again. "And _this_ one is for the United States of America!" He smashed Nemesis Enforcer so hard it knocked the Cobra La warrior cold. Althea and Siryn managed to engage Pythona.

"Hold still, you filthy humans!" Pythona snarled as she tried to strike the two mutant leaders. 

"Hey Snake-woman! Let me show ye why that I am known as Siryn! _WAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!_" Theresa Rourke wailed with her sonic voice, causing Pythona to cover her ears and close her eyes tightly. 

"AAAGH!!!! That scream! Stop that infernal scream, you wench!" 

"I can do that for ya." Althea smirked. Using her hydrokinesis, she summoned some water to wrap around her arm and form a huge watery fist. She punched Pythona hard with the fist, knocking her cold. "Well, that'll shut her up for a little while."

"Aye, Wavedancer." Theresa agreed, landing next to her East Coast counterpart. They heard a crash. They saw Gilgacon flying through a wall. The genetically-created cyborg was bashed to pieces, and his arms were ripped off. Jake stalked out in his Dragon Mode, carrying Gilgacon's arms. He smirked, revealing his sharp teeth.

"I beat him with his own arms." Jake grinned, holding up Gilgacon's arms. Althea and Siryn winced.

"Hey, Red Dragon!" Siryn winced. "Try not to hold up those things in front of us." She rubbed her stomach in an attempt to ease it. "Hoo boy."

"Thanks, Jake. I really needed to see that." Althea's face turned slightly green. Jake noticed Golobulus try to blast Falcon. 

"Hang on, Falcon!" Jake flew into action, smashing into Golobulus. Falcon took advantage of the distraction and raced to the BET. She shut the Broadcast Energy Transmitter off, and the energy beam shut off. Golobulus threw the wrestler off. Golobulus laughed.

"You're too late, human." Golobulus smirked. "The spores over your planet have matured and they are ready to burst. Once they do, your world will end. Mankind will be reverted into snakes, and Cobra La will rise and retake our rightful places as rulers." A laughing Golobulus left triumphantly. Falcon snarled. He cursed up a storm until he got an idea. The Joes and Misfits gathered around the device. 

"We heard. What do we do?" Lady Jaye asked.

"I got an idea." Falcon ran to the BET and switched it on. He started turning some knobs and pressing buttons on it. The BET's energy beam grew in width, and even the machine started glowing. "Go! I'll overload the machine! It'll destroy the spores!" Jinx and Sergeant Slaughter grabbed him.

"Big rule of the Renegades, kid: Either we all go home, or none of us go home!" Sarge and Jinx dragged Falcon away.

"C'mon, everyone! Let's get out of here!" Hawk ordered. The BET's whine was growing louder and higher every second as the Joes and the Misfits got out of there as fast as they could run or fly or whatever. The BET exploded, sending a huge burst of energy into space. The energy burst fried the spores, as well as Cobra La, and caused them to exploded. The fried spores fell harmlessly to Earth. 

"WE DID IT!" Hawk proclaimed. The Joes celebrated. The Renegades hooted and hollered, and gave each other hugs. The Misfits cheered. 

"Thanks a lot, guys! You nearly trampled me!" Lady Jaye groaned.

"Hey! I got a call from Stretcher! Duke's going to be okay!" Paul yelled. The Joes celebrated. Falcon smiled at the sky as the fried spores rained down. 

"Thanks, big brother."

"YO JOE!!!!!!"

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(Bayville, New York)

Senator Robert Kelly watched the spores rain down, and he scratched his head. 

"What's going on here?" He failed to notice he breathed in one of the spores. Suddenly, he clutched his heart, and he started having a seizure. Meanwhile, Duncan Matthews also noticed the spores.

"What's going on here?" He wondered. He breathed in a couple burnt spores. Suddenly, he grabbed himself and screamed real loud in pain. At the X-Mansion, a certain voice was heard yelling.

"**_OH NOW I KNOW THE STARCHILD HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH THIS!!!!!_**" The voice of Scott Summers roared. Then was heard the sound of something hard and metallic hitting his head. "**_OWWW!!!!_****_ JEEEEEEEEAN!!!! THAT HURT!!!!_**"

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(Virus's Lab, Dreadnok HQ)

"This had better be bloody worth it, Commander." Virus said to a big cylindrical gray chamber in his lab. A pair of eyes peeked out through a small window. 

"Oh it will be Virus. It will be." Cobra Commander hissed through the cylinder. Using a sample of his original DNA, Virus built a chamber to restore Cobra Commander. "Once we get Serpentor, we'll destroy GI Joe and the Misfits! And Althea will be all yours." Virus giggled madly. It was the only reason why he was doing this in the first place!

_Soon, Althea.__ Soon, we'll be together again. We'll take walks down __London__ like we used to do when we were kids._

Hoo boy! Looks like Virus and Cobra Commander are going into business! What will come of this? What'll happen in the future! Find out soon! This is L1701E, signing off!


End file.
